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sure start women so rude

(83 Posts)
Happypenguin2014 Wed 20-Aug-14 13:45:51

Poped into the local sure start centre today with an old school friend, who we've recently been back in touch. She has a gorgeous 8 month old daughter who's teething.

Df had to fill in a form so I held baby. She started crying, not major but a grumpy cry.

The women from sure start said " aww poor girl, she needs socialising "

ERM no. Baby was teething and wanted her mummy.

Aibu to think she's a muppwt.?

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Wed 20-Aug-14 13:47:38

Sounds like the Sure Start lady needs socialising.

Hope you told her that.

ShatnersBassoon Wed 20-Aug-14 13:48:41

The Sure Start

Kantha Wed 20-Aug-14 13:48:59

grin I've done some voluntary work with them. Fundamentally well meaning people, but they drove me nuts with their form filling and 'do-good' intentions.

ShatnersBassoon Wed 20-Aug-14 13:51:24

The Sure Start volunteers I've met all seem to overestimate how knowledgeable they are about child development.

icanmakeyouicecream Wed 20-Aug-14 13:52:13

I find they are mostly full of shit.

SaucyJack Wed 20-Aug-14 13:52:48

This is precisely why I won't go within 30 foot of a Shart centre.

You think you're going for a nice afternoon out with your baby, but what you really get is a load of judgey women looking for any reason possible to criticise your parenting so they can report you to SS

soapboxqueen Wed 20-Aug-14 13:57:43

My sure start was lovely but can't comment on others. I suspect the woman was assuming that the baby didn't like to be away from its mum and was too clingy. Though why she felt the need to comment on it is beyond me.

I think she was just rude busy body

Happypenguin2014 Wed 20-Aug-14 14:01:18

Sadly its put my friend right off. Only toke her there so we could groups that they could do.

I had major issues with shart haha when my D's was younger,always judging my parenting!

UriGeller Wed 20-Aug-14 14:01:53

God I hate the words "socialising" and "socialisation".

It means absolutely nothing but has become another way to make parents feel like they aren't doing it right.

TremoloGreen Wed 20-Aug-14 15:01:24

Socialising is what you do to dogs!

Thebodyloveschocolateandwine Wed 20-Aug-14 15:07:12

She sounds unhinged.

Run for the hills.

LapsedTwentysomething Wed 20-Aug-14 15:11:29

I did go to some sure start stuff but much of the content was deeply patronising.

MintyCatLeaf Wed 20-Aug-14 15:40:13

She sounds bizarre. hmm

Tikimon Wed 20-Aug-14 16:54:13

Babies get exactly zero from being together, they just stare and do their own thing. It's the mother's that benefit.

I think from 2 years old and on though it can be beneficial.

The worst that will happen if your child isn't around other children is that they'll be mature for their age when they start school because they've been hanging around adults. Nothing wrong with that. smile

Bue Wed 20-Aug-14 17:04:30

I worked with community midwives based in a Sure Start centre for one of my degree placements. So much of what I saw made me go hmm The information given in the baby/breastfeeding group was utterly patronising, but worse was the fact that you were not allowed to take a hot drink within about half a mile of a child. We had to pass through the enormous playroom to get from the office to the clinic room (there was never a child within arm's reach) and the midwives were forced to sneak their cups of tea through when the receptionists weren't looking.

KnittedJimmyChoos Wed 20-Aug-14 18:53:49

Oh no this is why I steer clear of them, I am sure they do good though but its sounds its gone mad.

Really Bue any other stuff you can share with us? I always feel totally watched and judged when had to pop in.

greeneggsandjam Wed 20-Aug-14 19:59:48

Weird. Who says things like that??

WhatsMyAgeAgain Wed 20-Aug-14 20:24:18

Mine gave me lots of shit advice about dropping bottles (ebf) to get little one to sleep through. Told me I shouldn't let baby demand when he wants milk (ebf on demand). Explained he won't be able to demand anything when I'm back at work full time so I'm not going to refuse him milk now. They changed their tune and said that I must make the most of my time with him.

Morons. I enjoy chatting with the other mums so put up with their crap advice.

ebwy Wed 20-Aug-14 21:10:49

Mine told me that my eldest would be maladjusted if we didn't take him to their groups. his school nursery staff laughed and said he's perfectly normal when I told them (3 years later, having never used their groups)

Happypenguin2014 Wed 20-Aug-14 21:25:49

I used to go a few times a month, when I decided I didn't like it anymore, they phoned social services because they hadn't heard from me lol

beccajoh Wed 20-Aug-14 21:31:51

My local one is great. Really can't fault them. The staff is lovely, as are many of the people I've met there.

LittleMisslikestobebythesea Wed 20-Aug-14 21:43:23

I went to my local one once, the staff were so patronizing, we didn't go back! The woman got stroppy when toddlers wouldn't sit for a long time for her story, even the adults were getting restless!

I didn't like the way they talked to us like we were children either! hmm

I know some people will benefit from it, just not for us!

BlinkAndMiss Wed 20-Aug-14 21:45:22

Mine was great, the staff were really lovely and helped me loads.

I think it was a misguided way of trying to get your friend to attend groups there, I don't think it sounds like a criticism. They heavily rely on numbers so they are desperate for people to attend, she was probably just making conversation and saying that the baby would enjoy it and not cry.

I think the pp calling her 'unhinged' is a bit far. And why on earth they would call ss because you didn't attend is beyond me, OP were you supposed to be attending or was it your own choice to attend?

Wrcgirl Wed 20-Aug-14 21:46:18

Oh my, our sure start centre is lovely, none of the negatives above

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