To assume I will having a c-section(38 Posts)
So I'm 17 weeks today and due 7th Jan.
Mine and DH first baby, we are both crazily excited.
I would love nothing more than to have a natural birth or even be able to give it a try.
Bit of a long story but 3 years ago I was in a car accident I broke 6 vertebrae in my back, had rods and nails put in to support my spine and had some vertebrae replaced with metal ones. Also broke my pelvis at the same time too. So as you can imagine my back is pretty painful at the best of times although I can manage to work and do most "normal" activities.
My DH is in the forces and we live abroad and the medical care here is amazing. My midwife told me at my first appointment though that they will no doubt want me to have a c-section which is understandable.
I am just dreading having more surgery after 3 horrific ops on my back and all the pain that comes with it. I previously asked my neurosurgeon who treated me if I would be able to give birth naturally one day and he said I would without problems. I keep doubting myself thinking maybe I shouldn't opt for an elective section and at least try but then I'm so concerned that I may damage my back more if it doesn't go to plan (one of the screws snapped last year so is floating around in there somewhere but they couldn't get it out and I get pains in my legs a lot from it now).
Aibu to assume I should just have a section and not risk damaging myself but to be sad that I couldn't try a natural birth?
Natural birth is overrated. I hurts. I have had two c sections due to medical issues and was very happy with my "birth experience". It's messy, bloody and painful whatever option you end up with.
Have a look at gentle c-section. If I ever have another baby this would be my choice.
I have Scoliosis and was fused at 15.
I had two c sections.
I believe the pregnancies made my back worse but not the sections. I dread to think what a vaginal birth would have done to it. My worry at the time though was for the safety of my dc.
Agree with MrsW; a birth is something that leads to a child. If a natural birth is likely to lead to you struggling to take care of your child then surely a C Section is the best option? Is there any way you could get some counselling to talk through your fear of the operation?
Mind you, I made my MW laugh when she asked if I was scared of birth. "Nope" i said "but I'm petrified of the following 18 years"
I agree with MrsW, it's overrated. In fact i only know 1 person who had a natural birth. As long as the baby gets here, the delivery method isn't important.
I completely agree, I want the section on the basis I don't want to risk not being able to care for my baby in the future and the fact there will be less risk to my baby during the birth.
I'm definitely not afraid of the operation, just hate the recovery and having to be looked after and have people doing things for me! I know that's irrational and I obviously want whatever is best for me and my baby.
I know either way is painful and hard I guess I would just like to have the option as I know many other women would like to as well!
A friend of mine had had a back injury - nothing like as bad as yours. During labour her back just sort of gave out and she had to have ventouse and episiotomy. There is a lot of strain on your back during labour.
I would add that if you have had a spinal injury they are unlikely to give you an epidural as they quite sensibly don't want to mess anything up. This both means obviously no epidural for natural childbirth but also a general for c-section.
You should talk to the doctors who will take care of you regarding your options. In your position, I would follow whatever they recommend is safest for you and baby. The whole 'too posh to push' crap has given people the impression c - sections are the easy way to give birth. They aren't. However, they are a safe and effective way to deliver a baby. Natural birth is too. But all that matters is your health and the baby in your arms. Good luck!
I had two sections due to previous surgery and honestly they are nothing compared to what you have been through. Your consultant who said you could have a natural birth one day might not say it regarding a day January, given the complications, it is not a green light by any means. They will be able to advise you but do listen and plan to have the nicest section possible.
Think of it in terms of time. For, what, one or two days(?) you'll struggle to pick up your baby - that's a good chance for your partner to bond and get used to his new role doing
all most of the housework and cooking. Then, for 6-8 weeks you'll be have to snuggle down with them in the house with a few short walks to drink nice coffee and eat nice cake, but unable to drive or do much heavy lifting. TBH I had a vaginal birth and did pretty much the same for the first couple of months (I accept it's different when you have a choice though!). Then there's the other 17 years and 10 months of running round after them!
I had an EMCS and was out of bed the next day, out of hospital in 3 days and shuffling round with a newborn at home perfectly well. Yes, you have to take it easy for a few weeks, but I am sure the same could be said for vaginal births, particularly if there is tearing, or stitches.
Thanks for all the comments they have made me feel so much better.
I have a friend who is a nurse and (unintentionally) keeps telling me how horrific her c-section was 2 months ago and i think that has definitely been playing on my mind!
I will be more than happy to shuffle round, eat cake and snuggle my baby whilst I recover
Hey! I'm due same day as you with DC2. There is no shame in opting for a c-section. Both types of labour have their positives and negatives as you mentioned up thread. You should just do what is right for you. Having not walked in your shoes I can't say for sure but I think I'd opt for c-section.
Don't listen! C sections are lovely
Much much better than all that pain and screaming.
I was terrified before my first one last year. It was such a relaxed and happy experience for us all. The recovery is also nowhere near as bad as I was expecting.
Now I'm quite looking forward to my one in December
If your surgeon thinks a natural birth would be safe then I would be inclined to trust him/her.
However, you may want to consider how you would cope with pain in labour, many women experience. A lot of pain in their backs during labour and it may be that the effort and strain of pushing ( and believe me you literally end up pushing with your whole back and lower body!!) might be harder to deal with due to the pre existing areas of damage.
After my second child I had pushed so hard, without being fully in control that my back and abdominal muscles were so weakened I could not maintain a standing position for 4 days.
I have never had a C section however so cannot compare how that would be pain wise etc.
Also if you fractured your pelvis might this not be the most difficult aspect of a birth, the pelvis has to stretch and shift to accommodate the baby, etc.
Good luck whatever you decide to do.
I have had two EMCS (and have often heard electives are easier as you haven't also had the trauma/exhaustion of labour first) and I honestly felt almost back to normal after 2 weeks.
I mean I was taking it easy and resting when I could but I had good recovery times. Second time round I was on my own with newborn and 20 month old toddler after 10 days and we all made it out to playgroup! I was given all clear to drive by GP 4 weeks after.
Like all births, different people have difference experiences but, if it helps, my c section recoveries were good so don't base all your thoughts on your friend who clearly had a harder time, they are not all like that.
It sounds like you have access to quality professional healthcare. I'd go with their advice.
Congratulations and best of luck.
I thought I had a relatively easy
but still agonizing "natural" labour (it was induced so not that natural) but I found out a week later from midwife that me and baby were actually in a rather dangerous position as she was face first coming out and they usually end in emcs.
Anyway the thought of being so exhausted after days of stop/start again contractions, a fast and very painful induced labour and then having to face an emergency csec, well it would have been just awfull
Really, have it all planned ready. It will be a much more enjoyable and calmer experience if you know what's going to happen and you can plan ahead. Congratulations XX
Aibu to assume I should just have a section and not risk damaging myself but to be sad that I couldn't try a natural birth?
The last person who said that to me had a damaged bladder through labour and a catheter in, was in and out of hospital for weeks.
A sectoin is a controlled environment, like any surgery of course things can go wrong, but goodness compared to what can go wrong in labour!! Its nothing, and in labour when your with a MW doc may not be available you may not have had an epidural etc, if something goes wrong in surgery you have pain relief etc and top professionals right with you.
Also emergency sections are v different to planned sections.
I think to be able to get one so easily is a gift I really do, I have had both and having my baby delivered via section was a beautiful amazing birth, compared to labour, exhausted, mentally, emotionally, physically, in pain below....
My back hurt for years after labour....not a twinge after section....all down below fine, no probs going to loo....
After my second child I had pushed so hard, without being fully in control that my back and abdominal muscles were so weakened I could not maintain a standing position for 4 days
same here couldnt straight for a week and in pain years after, dull pain but pain non the less.
Nothing after section.
C-sections are great! I had one a few months ago and it's been fine. Considering I'd never had surgery before I was a bit worried but it was an emergency c-section so didn't have a lot of time to think about it! But I would definitely have another one with the next baby. I've just started running again to build up my stomach muscles so life gets back to normal pretty quickly.
Don't get too hung up on a natural birth, I was very much going down the water birth relaxing music route until the first real contraction hit and then it was a case of 'forget that hippie whale birthing shit, give me drugs now!!!' You don't get a medal for the best childbirth, as long as the baby arrives safely and you are okay then do what you need to do. I'm kind of skeptical now about the natural childbirth stories tbh. I'm sure most of these earth mothers were off their faces on drugs at the time. Men have big fish stories, women have childbirth stories
I've had a natural delivery and I've had two sections, one emergency and one planned. Out of my three deliveries my most recent was the best experience and it was a planned section.
I went to hospital on the morning of the section and sat in a room on the ward with DH. A MW came to introduce herself and she was my MW who would be staying with me from before theatre right the way up until I got to the postnatal ward. I got changed into a gown and stockings then the surgeon, the anaesthetist and the paediatrician came to introduce themselves and to see if I had any questions. We walked down to theatre and I waited in a little room while DH got changed into some scrubs. My MW stayed with me. When DH got back we all went into theatre. I was a bit nervous and told them so. The anaesthetist put a cannula in my hand and then gave me a quick hug before doing my spinal, the nurse hugged me while the spinal was done. It didn't hurt, just some pressure and they chatted to me all the way through. Once it started to work they lay me down and they really took their time to make sure it was fully working before they started. They had their ipod in a docking station with music playing and everyone was chatting, it was really relaxed. There was some tugging and rummaging - totally pain free - and then a cry, my baby They lifted him up for us to see and asked DH if he wanted to cut the cord. He said no (he didn't want to see the surgery end of things!). They took the baby into the corner for the paediatrician to quickly check him over the he came to me. They tucked him into my gown for some skin to skin then DH had a cuddle while I chilled out while they stitched me back up. Once it was all done they moved me to recovery, DH stayed with me, and I had DS stripped to his nappy and tucked in my gown for more skin to skin and breastfeeding. I had a blood pressure cuff on that took a reading every few minutes and a few different bags hooked up to my drip. I was in there for around four hours as I had low blood pressure and they wanted it up a bit before I went to the ward.
Once I got to the ward I was in bed until the following morning. I had a little sidecar cot that clipped to the side of the bed so I could get DS in and out for myself, if I needed anything that was out of reach I just buzzed and someone came to help me. Next morning after breakfast they came and unhooked my catheter and helped me stand up. Standing up for the first time is the worst bit but it's quickly over. Two nurses walked me to the shower, one either side, and I was asked if I wanted one to stay with me (I didn't). I had a shower then they walked back with me.
I stayed in hospital for two nights then went home. I had blood thinning injections for a week and the dressing was on the wound for five days (the MW came out daily to check it and change it if needed). My wound was sealed with a string with a bead on each end, it's great as it's easier to care for than stitches (you basically leave it alone) but as the wound starts to heal it goes tight. On day 10 the MW removed the string and I did an audible sigh of relief, I felt a million times better once it was out!
I did take things easy but I was shuffling about well enough and a eight days after delivery managed to shuffle round the shops with a few rest stops and a pub lunch along the way recovery honestly wasn't as bad as I was expecting and they give you painkillers to take home with you. I had diclofenic, paracetamol and oramorph if I wanted it.
There are loads of threads on here with tips for section preparation and recovery if you use the search function
Natural birth is not overrated, it's amazing! Well, it was for me & I forgot about the pain immediately after the birth.
Otoh, I think having a c section can be a lovely experience in its own right, too. In your situation I think I'd opt for a cs. Natural birth would put great strain on your injuries.
Good luck with whichever you decide.
Standing up for the first time is the worst bit but it's quickly over
Actually this was worse part for me, I fainted and its quite common so always make sure when you first move you have people with you but this may be common after surgery anyway?
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