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to think he should have stepped up even just this once.

(34 Posts)
oxfordmumma1 Mon 28-Jul-14 18:47:59

So dd3 aged 22 months is a mummys girl. Partly as dh really had very little to do with her in her early years and me breastfeeding of course. When we go out as a family it is normally me who deals with her.
So on Friday I had a colonoscopy under sedation. Dh grudgingly agreed to take day off. He dropped me off and picked me up. However, he also needed a blood test. So I thought he would take dd2 and dd3 with him to get blood test and than pick me up. But no, he comes to collect me less than an hour after procedure and said I need to have a blood test. Do you want to wait in cs4r with dc. As I had been told I shouldn't be responsible for young dc for 24 hours I declined. Although probably our 8 year old could have alerted someone if anything happened.
Anyway we all traipsed to blood test area. Dd, of course wouldn't sit still. However, it was me who got up when she went exploring. I waited for dh to move but no he just sat there.when I moaned he said well I could be called in. But his was number was nowhere near. After 2nd attempt I actually asked dd to go after her for me. Can't believe I said that.
Aibu to expect a bloody day off parenting following a colonoscopy.

HighwayDragon Mon 28-Jul-14 18:49:40

Your partner is a shit

BookABooSue Mon 28-Jul-14 18:51:35

YANBU. If he was unable to cope with the dcs and a blood test, he should have scheduled the blood test for a different day.

burgatroyd Mon 28-Jul-14 18:52:51

I don't like the sound of him

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks Mon 28-Jul-14 18:53:22

I remember your last thread.
Sorry your DH was so unhelpful.
Those first few hours after a colonoscopy when you have sedation are the worst! You don't feel yourself at all do you?
He was being very unreasonable, and actually very mean.
YANBU at all.
((gentle hugs))

TruJay Mon 28-Jul-14 18:53:47

Bloody hell, what a sod! I bet u felt horrendous, yanbu to be angry at all.
There is no excuse! I hope u are feeling better now.
Think u need to have a talk about sharing parental responsibility, what he did was rotten.

oxfordmumma1 Mon 28-Jul-14 18:58:34

Tbh I didn't feel horrendous. I was still a bit wobbly though.

Humansatnav Mon 28-Jul-14 19:00:44

He is beyond ridiculous.

MintyChops Mon 28-Jul-14 19:01:59

Oh that's really crap of him. Why the hell didn't he either get it done before collecting you or else on a different day? I would be very, very cross with him.

PleaseJustShootMeNow Mon 28-Jul-14 19:05:37

YANBU your partner sounds like a selfish arse.

LuisSuarezTeeth Mon 28-Jul-14 19:22:06

I remember your other thread.

He's a tool.

Happy36 Mon 28-Jul-14 20:31:14

Hope you are feeling better after your colonoscopy.

I haven't read your other thread but based on this one I'd say you would be reasonable to sit down with your partner to tell him that you felt he didn't fulfil his responsibilities this time and could behave differently to provide a more helpful role in the family in any similar situation in future.

Take care.

Pobblewhohasnotoes Mon 28-Jul-14 20:38:55

Is your DH always this much of a selfish unthinking tool?

TheRealAmandaClarke Mon 28-Jul-14 20:40:34

I hope you're well.
I'll do his next blood test if you like grin

LynetteScavo Mon 28-Jul-14 20:59:34

Poor you.

In your shoes I would be angry.

Fairylea Mon 28-Jul-14 21:02:00

He sounds absolutely horrendous.

When I had a colonoscopy I got home and literally just about passed out on the sofa. And slept for 12 hours. There was no way I could have gone to the doctors and supervised children!

I'm really angry for you.

Castlemilk Mon 28-Jul-14 21:05:12

Next time, have a DH-ectomy.

Have it under local so you can immediately throw a 'FREE AT LAST - AU REVOIR MANCHILD!' party.

He's a knob. Hope you get shot soon.

Staryyeyedsurprise Mon 28-Jul-14 21:53:04

OP to my ropey memory this is at least the third thread in a relatively short space of time regarding you feeling unsupported by your husband. I think you need to talk to him. Something's not right, either with perception, communication or the relationship.

FWIW YANBU on this.

oxfordmumma1 Thu 31-Jul-14 00:47:55

Thank you for replies. Serious discussion definately needed. I feel fine now but the one opportunity I had to relax a little was taken away.
It was bizarre really. He was happy for me to run around after 22 month old dd within an hour of colonoscopy but wasalso saying I sshouldn't drive for more than 24 hours.
Funny also how the even of my colonoscopy coincided with his medical condition flaring up.
Just feel like I need a break.

Wibblypiglikesbananas Thu 31-Jul-14 00:50:34

You don't need a break, you need a divorce! The way he treated you was appalling!

oxfordmumma1 Thu 31-Jul-14 00:55:44

I think he just didn't realize how big a procedure it was.
I have had blood test before and just take little one with me. (Fortunately she slept last time) .
I suppose he isn't used to it. Need to have a big discussion as things can't continue as they are,
Thank you

StillFrigginRexManningDay Thu 31-Jul-14 08:19:21

I have not read your other threads but based on this your husband is a grade A arsehole.

KnackeredMuchly Thu 31-Jul-14 08:50:25

You need a break up.

kentishgirl Thu 31-Jul-14 11:35:27

So dd3 aged 22 months is a mummys girl.

Partly as dh really had very little to do with her in her early years - why is this?

and me breastfeeding of course. - makes no difference at all to the role of the other parent. Why are you allowing this as an excuse?

oxfordmumma1 Thu 31-Jul-14 13:12:12

Well he claims it is because of breastfeeding. I feel though it is due to him having little involvement in the early days. Works long hours with a long commute.
She also wasn't planned and tbh it took him longer to adjust to new family dynamic. Wrong but that's how it was.

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