My DD is 2 and a half and has got speech delay. I referred her myself to speech therapy when she was 22 months old as I realised she was delayed when I filled in a developmental profile for her. Looking back I should have referred her earlier as she didn't make as many noises and babble as much as other babies. However, being my 1st I didn't realise how significant this was.
Speech therapy has been useful for giving me hints and tips on encouraging her to speak but we are only seen every 3-4 months. I have tried private speech therapy but she didn't seem as good as the NHS one to be honest.
On her 2nd birthday she was saying only 'mama' and 'dada'. Now at 2 and a half she has about 75 words (some very clear, some not so clear) and can use 2 word phrases 'mummy car' 'daddy gone' etc.
I was reading online last night to try and get some tips on how to start encouraging her to put 3 words together but all I seemed to come across was how children with speech delay are always behind academically which leads to many of them disliking education.
Being a former teacher this upsets me greatly and I feel as if I have completely let her down by not recognising she had a problem earlier. I think I have done everything right to encourage her to speak...as a baby I talked to her none stop, she watches little TV (certainly less than her normal speaking friends) and we have always gone to a baby group/class every day. Maybe I do something wrong that I just don't see.
A few months ago lots of people were pressurising me to get her into nursery as they said this would help her speech. I found her a lovely Montessori nursery but she only went 3 times. She absolutely hated it and cried all day. She went from being a very sociable, happy little girl to a very clingy one. Luckily, after 2 weeks of not going to nursery she was back to her old self and everyone comments how affectionate and confident she is. I did find a nanny to have my 2 children for just 1 morning a week (8am-1pm). She is lovely and comes into our home. My DD loves her and is very happy to stay with her while I go upstairs to get some housework etc. done or the Nanny takes the children to the park.
This leads me to believe that it was the nursery setting that upset my DD, possibly because she couldn't really communicate with anyone. Therefore, maybe it is inevitable that she will go on to have an unhappy school life and be unable to reach her potential academically. I hated school as I was painfully shy so I have done my best to make my DD as sociable as possibly. However, it seems I have condemned her to the same unhappy experience as I had.
I have set up a room as a learning space for her which contains all Montessori equipment, art/craft materials etc. I plan activities for my DD every day and we have a lot of fun. I am so scared of her leaving this place where she is happy, secure and safe and going off to a nursery where she is destined to fail all because of her speech. According to what I have read she will be behind in everything because she has speech delay. Someone even suggested the other day that I claim DLA for her. Has she really got a disability that will affect the rest of her life?
I was so stressed this morning that I frantically tried to get her to say some 3 word phrases. She tried her hardest but didn't do great. We both ended up in tears. I feel like the most dreadful mother in the world. Heaven help my newborn if I can't even help my 1st child to succeed.
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AIBU?
To feel hopeless and sad that my 2 and a half year old DD has virtually been written off academically already
267 replies
OlderMummy1 · 20/07/2014 08:43
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