DF and I are getting married next June but it's becoming increasingly frustrating that he seems to think so much of his life needs to remain "private " (almost secret) from me. What pisses me off further is that this is a complete contrast to what he expects from me.
The latest one is that his mum has just given him £5k. Great. We've discussed it, I've said it's his money, he decides what happens to it etc etc and he's insisted he'll use it to sort our finances. Lovely. Now I've just seen a "private" skype conversation (it popped up when I put the computer on) where he's told his son that grandma is also giving him and his brother £1k each. Again, lovely but why would he not mention it to me? Why keep that private/secret? He knows all about the money my mum gave my kids, why would he not think to mention it like I talk to him about stuff like that? If it was just a one off it wouldn't be so bad but he's done it a few times. His son asked "us" to pay for a car - a big conversation took place over a couple of days between him and DP yet it never got mentioned to me once. I only found out they were discussing it as he left his Facebook open and his son replied whilst I was using the pc.
A few months ago dp came home from picking up his kids and said "looks like ds won't need to stay with us for a week now" ... I was like "eh???" And he said oh ... I told you ex was having an operation and I agreed with her that ds could stay with us whilst she recovered but they've sorted it do it doesn't matter". He did NOT discuss this with me at all.
And then DSS says last weekend "so you're still ok with me and girlfriend coming away with you next year then?" DP mutters "yeah no big deal is it". I say "what's this?" And he says "oh when we go to Bath I said we could take them down at the same time, they won't be staying with us though, don't worry". I should fucking hope not, it's our honeymoon!!!
So yeah he just never involves me. The latest one (him not mentioning to me that his mum has given his kids money and slyly breaking it to them behind my back) has just broke the camels back I think. I tell him everything.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
To think in a marriage - there shouldn't be so much "privacy"
58 replies
ToForgiveIsCanine · 10/07/2014 11:31
OP posts:
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.