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To think DDs reaction wasn't "not normal"?

(133 Posts)
lalala2 Tue 08-Jul-14 20:47:25

I was out for lunch today with my dad and DD (just turned 3) when a woman came and sat right beside DD as I was cutting up her food and the woman put her face right up to DD and told her to eat up, told her to blow on her food, to use the fork etc and asked how hold she was. DD looked down as she's very shy with strangers and I said "how old are you?", "you're 3 aren't you?" And DD said yes. I said sorry she's really shy, she's starting playschool on Monday so I'm hoping that brings her out of her shell a bit.
The woman then said "that's not normal! No I'm sorry but that's just not normal, she should be able to speak to me!!!" Then she turned to my dad and said "the problem is she's S.P.O.I.L.E.D"

My dad just tried to make a joke about it but the woman was getting really angry and was looking at DD shaking her head saying that's not right!! I was really polite to the woman but I'm fuming a little bit at her cheek, there's nothing wrong with DD, we have a tiny family (just me and DD and we see my dad occasionally) so she's just not used to adults being so forward I think it caught her off gaurd!

AIBU or was DDs reaction totally abnormal?

littletreesmum Tue 08-Jul-14 20:48:56

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mercifulgibbon Tue 08-Jul-14 20:49:05

Why did you let that woman treat your dd like that?

Weathergames Tue 08-Jul-14 20:49:16

Was the women pissed?

Icimoi Tue 08-Jul-14 20:49:55

YANBU, the woman's entire course of conduct was abnormal.

runningonwillpower Tue 08-Jul-14 20:50:18

Your daughter is normal.

That woman isn't. Not only does she sound weird, she sounds a bit scary.

Run next time you see her coming.

mrscumberbatch Tue 08-Jul-14 20:50:23

Your Dd is totally normal. I'm a grown woman and wouldn't be happy with that encounter

TucsonGirl Tue 08-Jul-14 20:50:36

The woman sounds like a nutter and it amazes me how some women (and it is always women in my experience) think they have the right to be overfamiliar and tell people what they are doing wrong in raising their children!

Flywheel Tue 08-Jul-14 20:51:19

Your dd if fine. Don't be too hard on the woman - I would imagine she has issues herself, as her behaviour was certainly not normal.

Littledidsheknow Tue 08-Jul-14 20:51:30

Whaaat? You should have got security to have the mad bitch removed. Your daughter is very normal, 3 of my five were very shy too.

LondonRocks Tue 08-Jul-14 20:51:39

She sounds demented and R.U.D.E.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine Tue 08-Jul-14 20:51:45

Your DD is normal, the women obviously had some sort of issues

ikeaismylocal Tue 08-Jul-14 20:53:20

I think the abnormal person in this situation was the odd woman.

I think you shouldn't apologise to people when you dd is shy and you shouldn't say that you hope playschool helps her become less shy, I think it's fine to say "she's a little shy" in a factual way but to connect negative emotions (apologising and hoping she gets less shy) could make your dd feel ashamed of her shyness.

I8toys Tue 08-Jul-14 20:53:28

She sounds like a loon. What gives people the right to make comments like this - never apologise for your daughter acting like this- she was right in not talking to such a strange woman.

miffybun73 Tue 08-Jul-14 20:54:25

YANBU, I would assume that the woman was drunk and/or mentally ill sad

CC77 Tue 08-Jul-14 20:54:42

YANBU, the woman was completely out of order. Horrible, judgemental person!

HaveYouHeardOfGoogle Tue 08-Jul-14 20:55:41

I wouldn't have been able to bite my tongue if she's spoken to/about my child like that. Don't know how you were polite to her, she was a rude bint!

MrsTerryPratchett Tue 08-Jul-14 20:56:25

My DD (3 yo) is the opposite and I get shit about that. Some people will have a go at small children no matter what they do. Ignore. And, teach your child that her feelings and opinions are important.

lalala2 Tue 08-Jul-14 20:56:40

I never thought of that ikea, I'll make note of that thank you!

When she was telling DD to eat etc she wasn't being nasty but after her tirade of "that's not normal" etc I got DD to move and sit beside her grandad.

Really annoyed I wasn't quick enough or brave enough to pull her on it though sad

Only1scoop Tue 08-Jul-14 20:57:34


'Not normal' vile witch I'd have been fuming angry

KatieKaye Tue 08-Jul-14 20:57:46

She sounds very peculiar. And very rude - to come over, shove her face into DDs and keep on talking when you were trying to eat. The final comment was OTT.

Your daughter sounds absolutely fine. TBH I wouldn't have blamed her if she'd dived under the table in an attempt to get away.

I'd say the weird woman doesn't get out very much

EugenesAxe Tue 08-Jul-14 20:58:05

Really how did she think SHE was normal, when she shoved her mush right next to someone she'd never met before?! I don't care if someone is 3 or 53, everyone deserves personal space.

I've never heard of shyness being blamed on someone being spoiled, and can't see it myself.

Wickeddevil Tue 08-Jul-14 21:04:21

Oh my, I don't think I'd have been responsible for my own actions if a random stranger had told one of mine to blow on her food. You must be very kind hearted and patient OP.

And I second ikea's point that being shy isn't a negative

What a loon that win an is

Wickeddevil Tue 08-Jul-14 21:04:58

Woman is. I hate the ipad when it thinks it know better grin

SaucyJack Tue 08-Jul-14 21:05:41

It's pretty clear from what you've said that the woman has bi polar or some other MH problem.

I don't really get the point of this thread tbh. There are people out who say strange things. Not exactly front page news.

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