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to admit my life is crap?

(109 Posts)
venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:09:02

I have a crap job, which pays so crappily I can only afford to live by doing a ridiculous amount of hours, which means I have no spare time to do anything I enjoy couldn't afford to anyway

Because of my crap job I never get to see friends, meeting a partner is out of the question, any sort of social life falls flat on it's face as my shifts change constantly.

Because my crap job has crap pay I live in a crap area, I eat crap because I rarely have time to cook, I look crap because I have to wear a horrible uniform, and I feel crap because I am exhausted ALL of the time.

No one will convince me my life isn't CRAP.

AIBU ? grin

LaurieFairyCake Wed 25-Jun-14 20:10:43


Change jobs - it literally couldn't be any shitter

You only get one life

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:11:39

Oh, if it were that easy Laurie ...!

Fideliney Wed 25-Jun-14 20:11:40

Sounds a bit erm crap.

YANBU to conduct an audit of your situation. What's your plan?

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:13:13

Hard to say, just at the moment, but I'm stuck with crap life for at least 6 months.

At the very least. Possibly more like 12.

It feels like a jail sentence!

MrsWinnibago Wed 25-Jun-14 20:14:25

Have you ANY options? Why are you stuck for that specific length of time?

Pumpkinpositive Wed 25-Jun-14 20:14:48

Does sound ... crap. thanks

How long has it been like this?

reddaisy Wed 25-Jun-14 20:14:49

Fideliney is right, you need a plan! What do you do, what are your qualifications? What would you like to do? I feel much better when I have a goal to work towards

Linskibinski Wed 25-Jun-14 20:15:01

Ooh really crap day? No pun intended. If you could have your dream job, what would it be? If you could fix one thing in your life, what would it be? If you work that out you at least have a place to start changing things. Sorry you feel rubbish thanks

weatherall Wed 25-Jun-14 20:16:04

What is your job?

If you are working lots of hours even on min wage surely you should have some down time and leisure?

Chocotrekkie Wed 25-Jun-14 20:16:04

Start looking for other careers - just go onto any job site and see what's in your area.

Read through some of the ones you like the look of - what do you need to do to stand a chance.

Teach yourself online - excel, word, PowerPoint tutorials are free or very cheap.
College Courses, open uni etc etc.
Do you need to volunteer somewhere to get experience ?

Make a 5 year plan and set some goals - small steps but all aiming towards the dream.

fairylightsintheloft Wed 25-Jun-14 20:16:42

ok so what CAN you change? You could make sure you always do your hair and make up, you could look at your diet and see if you can make some changes so you feel better - not all healthy food is expensive or time-consuming. The social life thing is hard with changing shifts but is there anyone who lives near that could sometimes be on standby for a quick drink or cinema? Sorry if these sound superficial but if for whatever reason you can't change the big things, do what you can that makes you feel better.

Fideliney Wed 25-Jun-14 20:16:45

When you are really stuck, you need tiny steps forward.

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:17:46

Dream job is out of the question (no, it really, really is. Well, it isn't, but not without a sacrifice so huge I'm not prepared to make it, so yes, out of the question.)

I'm stuck for reasons I can't really divulge - just very identifying. I am a qualified professional but can't use that qualification <yet> - so for now at least I am stuck as I do need to eat, wear shoes, pay council tax.

It's just so, horribly CRAP.

STOPwiththehahaheheloling Wed 25-Jun-14 20:18:47

Ok so pick one of those things and make a plan to fix it. Job probably a long term fixer. What about your social life. Decide now that you are going to meet up with friends once a month (pay day might be the best day for that grin) and get texting. Do you get paid this weekend? Text/call your closest friends and tell them you are fed up of not getting out enough so will they take pity on you and meet for coffee/ walk in the park/cocktails at a bar/ or come over for dinner at yours. It doesnt have to cost loads or take a massive chunk of time.

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:20:56

Weatherall minimum wage just won't cover living expenses properly.

I can only live, really, by doing crazy hours. My job works in the sense that I'm only paid for the time I work, but I have split shifts, so to use today for example, I worked 6-11, 12-14 and 16-20. Not worth going home in between but not paid for those times, so really, I've done a 14 hour day but been paid for 11 of those hours.

Beastofburden Wed 25-Jun-14 20:21:05

Awww. Am sending virtual chocolate and hugs.

What will change in six to twelve months? Is there anything you can do to make sure it is only six months? That means the crap is wearing off by Christmas.

Something really stupid, like keeping a diary, might be all you need to get to Christmas, if you know that's how long it has to be. You could write a great blog about life on a crap job, like Jack Monroe.

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:22:12

It's not just the cost, it's the time. My hours are pretty anti social and whole I do sometimes see friends once a month doesn't make up for the other 30 or 29 days that are crap.

Timetoask Wed 25-Jun-14 20:22:36

Well, if you cannot give details of your situation, then the only thing we can give you is some serious hand holding, and to tell you to think of the POSITIVES you do have.
You have job
You have your health
A place to live
What else do you have? I bet lots more.

Regarding the social side, you don't need to spend money. Find a friend that might want to meet up once a week for a brisk walk somewhere for chatting and exercising.

Frogisatwat Wed 25-Jun-14 20:24:17

Oh that is crap. 14 hours and 11hours pay. Crap crap crap.
why can't you use your qualification yet?

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:27:29

I can't really explain, sorry, it's a long story and uses so much detail that it identifies me immediately. I'm trying to get it sorted though.

Meeting friends isn't about money. It's the fact I have no time, it's the fact my life is crap and I find it hard to be around those who have quite a nice life really, and the fact they are hard to pin down!

Sounds like you've got some future options venturingforth - it's just that you're a bit stuck for now. But not as stuck as some people might be? Does that help at all?
And I agree that looking at small things you can change, or even small things you can appreciate as they are, could be helpful.
I like the "daily gratitudes" thread - it's lovely over there.
We post about how glad we are to have a hot cup of tea, see and smell our fresh washing drying on the line (one particular poster has a fresh line-dried washing fetish!), or for the roof over our heads.
But we're a weird lot, it might not be everyone's cup of tea brew grin

STOPwiththehahaheheloling Wed 25-Jun-14 20:30:00

So you actually dont want to spend your free time with friends?

Fideliney Wed 25-Jun-14 20:30:57

So you do have a plan to get on to more regular fixed hours in 6-12 months? Is that right?

venturingforth Wed 25-Jun-14 20:33:50


It's what might happen if I can't get sorted and if this is the rest of my life that haunts me.

Yes, I'd love to spend free time with friends, or the old me would at any rate. The new me works 14 hour days 6 days a week and is pretty much worn out constantly, so doesn't always feel massively sociable at the end of a 14 hour day, and on my day off (a weekday) friends aren't up for coming out as they are all at work.

I'm not on trial at the stand, you know.

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