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To think nursery should respect my wishes about suncream?

(98 Posts)
SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:27:13

I covered my DS1 (2yo) in once a day sunscreen this morning (as written on the suncream slip for nursery that I will do, I haven't actually given permission for them to apply it really) to find he had been covered in the nursery's suncream several times today. When I questioned them about it and said that I had put P20 on him this morning as I had said I would do and had said this morning when I dropped him off that I had done.

I was told that he had been doing water play (it's water resistant up to 80 minutes in water and I have told them this) and how one of the other nursery staff used a once a day on holiday and went in the pool was "burnt to the bone". I tried telling them that he has really sensitive skin and it's only the P20 that doesn't bring him out in rashes and was completely dismissed with them repeating about their work mate who was burnt on holiday....

I was then told that "well you look like you could do with some suncream too". My shoulders are a bit red but really that's none of their business, my kids are always covered.

DS is now covered, face, arms and legs in angry red rashes and I know it was their cream as it goes higher than I put the cream on him on arms/legs. I am fuming.

Shenanagins Tue 17-Jun-14 23:32:37

I can understand why nurseries do this as they don't want to run the risk of a child burning whilst in their care. However if you told them he was allergic to many brands of sunscreen they should have asked you to provide them with a brand they can apply.

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:35:50

When they asked me to sign the sunscreen slip with the manager, I talked about using a once a day instead and was told this was fine and they had no problem with it. I didn't actually get very much in detail with it as I had believed that the agreement was that I put the cream on in the morning, maybe if they thought I hadn't put it on him but I told them I had this morning.

It's more the fact she didn't seem bothered when I did tell her I didn't want random cream applied several times a day due to skin issues with other types. Seemed to believe she was in the right because her friend was burnt on holiday using a once a day cream.

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:38:02

I should also add that the person I spoke to today, I actually know as she was one of the staff in the after school care I went to and was also a neighbour.

Thought I should add but I don't think that it matters either way.

IAmTheGodOfTitsAndWine Tue 17-Jun-14 23:38:27

No, this isn't right. I'm a parent representative at a nursery and the staff are ignoring your wishes and acting in a 'we know best' manner. You need to ask for a meeting with the manager and tell them just how unhappy you were with the way the staff ignored you.

yummumto3girls Tue 17-Jun-14 23:41:12

I have used P20 on all three of my children for similar reasons, however despite what it says on the bottle I would reapply during the day. Nursery cannot let children go all day without reapplying cream. They are unreasonable to apply something that he is allergic to, mine comes home from nursery feeling all greasy and horrible, you need to send the P20 in for them to reapply.

ColdCottage Tue 17-Jun-14 23:41:16

You have protected your child's skin, informed his care staff and given them clear instructions and reasons not to apply any additional cream.
They wouldn't given your child or medication if you informed them not to would they.
If on the other hand you hadn't put cream on your child (or told them if you had) you could understand most adults just wanting the best for child but this is not the case.

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:41:57

I'm going to ask for a meeting when he's back on Tuesday. I think the manager will understand, she's nice and had no problem with my wishes about creams.

Just wanted to check that this wasn't the usual thing and that I wasn't being unreasonable to go in and say I wasn't happy.

18yearsoftrying Tue 17-Jun-14 23:43:34

The nursery staff had a legal obligation....they could not afford to be sued for neglect by allowing your DS to get sunburnt as in the eyes of the law, this is what would have happened.

It was a tough judgement call for them to make....I know, I've been a qualified nursery nurse for 20 years and very recently undertook the paediatric first aid course. They had a choice of preventing the sunburn by presumably allowing him to play in the shade, applying lotion which would have prevented the sunburn and then dealing with the aftermath of the reaction to the lotion.

I'd talk to the manager and summarise your wishes in writing in a formal letter.

DrCoconut Tue 17-Jun-14 23:44:06

DS's nursery has parents supply their own sun cream. It works as everyone can send what suits their child.

ColdCottage Tue 17-Jun-14 23:44:16

Agree best to send own product in for top up just in case there are a number of water play occasions in the day.
P20 works fine all day for me but sure it varies on others.
I'd send clear instructions if I did send it in as would only need to be topped up once if a long day rather than multiple times like normal cream and its expensive.

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:45:15

Yum I have never had a problem with the length of protection it provides, I'd rather not re-apply when it isn't needed as I don't want to risk a reaction for no reason. I will send the P20 in just to avoid this in future but it really isn't needed.

Cold Funnily enough we had the medication discussion today too, because DS also has hayfever and will need piriton, so I needed to get a prescription.

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:46:43

18 It's not what would have happened as he was already protected with the cream I put on him. He is now covered in an itchy rash, but that's okay?

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:47:39

Dr Our nursery is the same which is why I was so surprised that they had used their own cream.

RawCoconutMacaroon Tue 17-Jun-14 23:48:06

Photograph the rash. Ask for an urgent meeting with the manager and emphasise to them that due to allergy NO suncreams are to be put on your child unless supplied by you.

WooWooOwl Tue 17-Jun-14 23:48:38

Just give them some p20 to use. Your son doesn't have products he can't tolerate used on him, the nursery gets to do their job properly, you don't have to deal with rashes, no one gets sunburnt. Everyone's a winner.

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:48:52

I hadn't thought of taking pictures, I will do that in the morning. Thanks. smile

SchroSawMargeryDaw Tue 17-Jun-14 23:50:51

WooWoo I wouldn't be happy with P20 several times a day either as no doubt the continual re-applying will also end up giving him a rash. Part of the reason the P20 doesn't leave him a red mess is that it isn't constantly being put on his skin.

Would a letter from a Doctor work if I could get one?

IAmTheGodOfTitsAndWine Wed 18-Jun-14 01:06:19

I'd speak to the manager and point out that the P20 instructions say to apply however frequently (is it genuinely a once a day thing or do the instructions say every six hours or something like that? It's been ages since I used it!) and that since you applied it at x time, it's not due to be applied until Y time. Tell them they are absolutely not to apply it any earlier in case of a reaction. If they're funny with you, use the example a poster said upthread - they wouldn't give a dose of Calpol before it was due and this is exactly the same thing.

Our nursery used to provide suncream but always allowed parents to supply their own in case of reactions, if that's what they wanted. When my DS first started there as a baby, he had mild eczema and we realised that washing powder made it worse. Nursery happily washed his bedding seperately in soap flakes for us, with no fuss whatsoever. Nothing was too much trouble to make sure his skin didn't react. THAT is the attitude all providers should have, not this 'Don't be daft, we know best so we'll ignore the silly parent' that is coming across from what you're saying.

CrohnicallyExhausted Wed 18-Jun-14 07:15:10

If the nursery are concerned about it falling on them if he gets burned then I would write a letter to be kept on his file. Something along the lines of "due to allergy I expressly forbid any member of staff to apply sun cream to DS, or allow sun cream to be applied while in nursery's care. I take full responsibility for applying p20 sun cream in the morning, as directed on the packet. I understand the risks involved in using an all day product, so if DS does get sunburned I will in no way hold nursery liable."

I expect nursery are concerned that they would get into trouble (eg with OFSTED) and would be failing their duty of care towards your son by not applying something. Therefore rather than just failing to give permission for cream to be applied, you need to make it clear that they don't have permission, and that you take full liability.

HoneyDragon Wed 18-Jun-14 07:24:12

Even P20 will need to be reapplied. It's good but not perfect. I'd send it in ....they won't excessively reapply it. But a top up after water play is never a bad idea.

Insist they use yours.

Tanith Wed 18-Jun-14 07:37:54

Have you given written permission or signed a form to allow them to apply suncream?
If not, they absolutely should not be applying it - OFSTED would take a very dim view. I know of childminders who've been downgraded because they didn't have signed permission.
I, too, have a child who is allergic to most brands. They're risking anaphylaxis, not just a rash, and I would be complaining to the manager.

Petrasmumma Wed 18-Jun-14 09:41:42

The nursery applied a product against your express and direct wishes? Yes, I'd say there was a problem. The staff sound rather challenging too.

I'm with Tanith on this. Suncream can contain all manner of rather harsh chemicals so it's not surprising some children will react, some to a very serious degree. Some parents would also be unhappy about children being subjected to things like Octocrylene for a start.

Take in a bottle of P20 so they have something which meets your choice for your DC and make a full written complaint. I don't see how they could object after that or they would be knowingly damaging your child which is actionable in negligence.

17leftfeet Wed 18-Jun-14 09:50:22

My dd had such a bad reaction to sun cream aged 3 that her eyes swelled shut and her mouth and lips started to swell

I would be livid if they had used something on my child that they had been told they were allergic to and I would certainly be complaining

beccajoh Wed 18-Jun-14 09:52:24

Send in a bottle of your chosen sun cream with instructions. They've not actively tried to harm your son, quite the opposite in fact. He's got a rash, not had an anaphylactic (sp?) reaction, even if the rash is unpleasant. Complain about the lack of paperwork.

Dermatologists recommend sun screen be applied every two hours regardless of what the bottle says. 8 hours is UP to 8 hours. Water resistant is not water proof (I'm sure you probably know that, but some people think it's the same).

Damned if they, damned if they don't by the sound of things. How would you have reacted if your son had come home sunburned?

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