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to think after spending my last fiver to buy cards they should write them

(30 Posts)
moolady1977 Sun 15-Jun-14 11:28:19

grrrrrr i spent my last fiver on 3 cards for my dc to give their dad my dh for fathers aibu to think they should at least write in the bog eyed bloody things they are 14,12 and 9 not babies it should take seconds ,,, im not doing it i refuse and if he dares says that i havent got him a card im gonna rip the bloody things up and chuck them at him grrrrr

CoffeeTea103 Sun 15-Jun-14 11:35:26

Yanbu, they aren't babies. Have you asked them to do it?

Itsjustmeagain Sun 15-Jun-14 11:35:49

why would you spend the last of your money on a card?? they could have made one free if they wanted to !

having said that yanbu to think they could at least sign their name.

Chocotrekkie Sun 15-Jun-14 11:38:11

A fiver for 3 cards shock.

I got my Dh's from the kids for 29p each in the card factory.

WynkenBlynkenandNod Sun 15-Jun-14 11:38:30

What's happening when you tell them to go and write the cards? Mine (kind of similar ages) needed reminding again this morning as forgot last night but did then get on with it.

defineme Sun 15-Jun-14 11:38:42

They should have made them. My 12 yrold did one on the computer and 10 year olds painted ones.
I would be worried about kids that can't be bothered to even do that. Why can't they?

KiaOraOAotearoa Sun 15-Jun-14 11:42:14

'Rip them and chuck them at him'???!!!!!!
I'll go fetch my pearls in a minute, in the meantime: what???!!!!


KatieKaye Sun 15-Jun-14 11:42:34

Why on earth did you buy cards for them in the first place? As you say, they aren't little children. If they are really unable for whatever reason to buy their own cards, why didn't you buy one from all three? Or tell them to make their own?

In any case, at their ages they should be using their own pocket money to buy the cards, how to plan, budge, take responsibility and care for others, all of which are important life-skills so you are doing them no favours by stepping in and sorting everything out. Father's Day is plastered all over the shop, media etc so they will be well aware of it and can have no excuses.
Your DC sound very ungrateful into the bargain. Perhaps you have to allow them to grow up?

moolady1977 Sun 15-Jun-14 11:44:17

yes they have been asked yes they have been reminded why wont they do it because it would mean getting off their arses and walking 5 or 6 steps .... yes mum has stopped wiping their bums and they dont like it ,,, think whats winding me up is they wanted the cards for him they picked them and grrr now they are just sat there

wafflyversatile Sun 15-Jun-14 11:44:23

What's wrong with one card from all three?

wafflyversatile Sun 15-Jun-14 11:45:08

Or them making them? It's not a great use of your last fiver unless even if you are getting money tomorrow.

Hakluyt Sun 15-Jun-14 11:47:05

I feel sorry for the poor old dad concerned. There something going wrong here if they don't want to acknowledge Father's Day.....

KatieKaye Sun 15-Jun-14 11:50:20

It is their problem, not yours.
Your DC clearly don't care about anyone except themselves. Have they always been this selfish? TBH they sound very indulged indeed and not very nice. "Asking them" when you are doing them a favour? No way. Reminding them when they jolly well know (it's hard to avoind the fact today is Father's Day) is not on either.
Time to start telling them "I want never gets"
However, if you have only recently stopped doing things like this, perhaps they are finding it hard to adjust to not having you do everything? Maybe it is a reaction to this?

ilovesooty Sun 15-Jun-14 11:53:46

Why did you buy them for them? Why are you enabling such selfish and lazy behaviour from children old enough to take responsibility? What's the point of seething away? Go out and leave them tooit and vow to make some changes.

ilovesooty Sun 15-Jun-14 11:56:33

In fact it sounds as though they're used to others doing everything for them. You're reading a set of not very pleasant people if they continue to expect and you continue to enable. Does their father chivvy them along on Mothers' Day too?

SavoyCabbage Sun 15-Jun-14 12:00:49

Put two of them away for the next two years for a start.

pissedglitter Sun 15-Jun-14 12:07:26

Very stern voice
"Get off your arse, sign the bloody card and go give it to your father with a fucking smile and a hug!"

I have had to remind my children to text/phone dads today

pissedglitter Sun 15-Jun-14 12:08:15

Oh and stop buying expensive cards
Card factory and home bargains is your best places to buy nice but cheap cards

ilovesooty Sun 15-Jun-14 12:10:21

I can't help wondering if you make their beds, cook all their meals and do all their washing and ironing too. I bet you do.

moolady1977 Sun 15-Jun-14 12:17:16

they are 14 12 and 9 so yes i cook clean wash and iron for them

Hakluyt Sun 15-Jun-14 12:27:39

14 and 12 certainly should be taking turns with cooking and ironing. 9 should be helping cook, ad doing other things.

Nobody past babyhood should be waited on hand and foot.

ilovesooty Sun 15-Jun-14 12:31:38

Why am I not surprised? How long are you going to wait on them hand and foot? The older two should be cooking their share of meals and doing their washing and ironing and the youngest should be lending a hand and have their own jobs to do. No wonder they're so lazy.

littlewhitebag Sun 15-Jun-14 12:39:39

Your children are not babies and it would serve them very well for their future if you stopped treating them like they were. They are very well able to go to the shops, choose and buy a card and write it. If they can't mange that then dad gets no card. Not your problem. They also need to use their own pocket money. If they have no money they make a card.

It sounds like you are doing far too much for them. They are all well old enough to do chores around the house. You are making a rod for your own back and they will have not a clue when they leave home.

ShatnersBassoon Sun 15-Jun-14 12:42:02

More fool you. They should be sorting it out between themselves.

KatieKaye Sun 15-Jun-14 12:49:00

Do your children do anything for themselves? Even the youngest should be able to cook an easy meal (pasta with pesto, beans on toast, mashed potatoes), help change a bed, do dusting and hovering and iron simple things like pillow cases as well as hanging out washing, cutting the edges of the grass, doing weeding etc. These are all things they need to know how to do in order to be able to look after themselves.
Are they expected to save part of their pocket money for family presents, holidays etc or do they just spend it all on themselves?
Is it totally unknown for them to spontaneously do something nice for another person, e.g. buying you a small bunch of flowers, washing the car without being asked?

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