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to wonder if people are at all concerned about being 'outed'?

(285 Posts)
Rochiana54 Sat 10-May-14 17:27:36

Some threads are so specific I.e. the thread about friends asking guest to bring dessert and a drink to dinner. If friend was a mnetter and read this post she would instantly know it was about her.

DrankSangriaInThePark Sat 10-May-14 17:29:36

It's up to them how much they want to share I suppose.

And HQ are always very willing to delete threads for privacy reasons. even when none exist and the OP is just getting a slamming

Sirzy Sat 10-May-14 17:30:22

I would imagine if people were that bothered they would change some details.

Personally I am not too bothered about being outed, but doubt I post much that would risk outing me, or that anyone would care about enough if they did know me

ilovesooty Sat 10-May-14 17:32:02

Given that it's the usual reason for name changing (even of the goady variety) I imagine people are.

thornrose Sat 10-May-14 17:32:34

I'm always surprised and disappointed more people don't pop up on threads and say "Oy, that's me you're talking about!"

ThursdayLast Sat 10-May-14 17:32:53

It's super easy to forget that all these lovely and funny nicknames have real life people that you might actually know behind them!
I'm sure I've been guilty of identifying over shares. And I'm 99% certain I've been posted about.

On those occasions I get the willies for a week or so, but soon forget to be careful grin

TheFarceAndTheSpurious Sat 10-May-14 17:34:56

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

thornrose Sat 10-May-14 17:36:47

Oh, I didn't realise your example was a real thread OP! That's not on.

GarlicMayHaveNamechanged Sat 10-May-14 18:08:30

YABU to start an AIBU that isn't.

YA also BU to start a TAAT.


Perfectlypurple Sat 10-May-14 18:14:17

I always remember the one where the op started a thread about her childs party and another mum trying to gatecrash by making it a joint party.

The other mum did an oi that's about me type thing and said it wasn't truthful. I don't think the original op came back to the thread once the other mum explained what actually happened although I may be wrong on that bit.

BOFster Sat 10-May-14 18:17:25

I'm not especially bothered about being outed/recognised on here- I've actually made a few good friends after that's happened. And I don't think I've ever slagged any real life person off on here, so there's nothing too awful that would come back to bite me on the arse I hope.

GarlicMayHaveNamechanged Sat 10-May-14 18:18:16

The dinner party poster was being perfectly reasonable on her thread. It was the other posters trying to make a Thing about it.


GarlicMayHaveNamechanged Sat 10-May-14 18:19:52

<considers biting BOF on the arse>

<decides to have an apple instead>

ManWithNoName Sat 10-May-14 18:21:34

I once read a thread and I knew the woman quite well in RL.

The thread was so specific about an event that she had been involved and I knew about that it was impossible to be anyone but her. I also know she lives in my city as she had said where she lived.

I have forgotten her username so in reality she ONLY outed herself for 1 day. The risk is really small.

RandallFloyd Sat 10-May-14 18:23:56

Nah, I overshare like a motherfucker.

I try to retain a semblance of anonymity but I wouldn't be particularly bothered if anyone did 'spot' me.

ManWithNoName Sat 10-May-14 18:24:56

No one here knows who I am.

My rules are:

1. don't ever mention where you live;

2. don't mention your children's school;

3. don't post pictures of your home or anything that is identifiably near your home or belonging to you.

4. don't ever mention MN to anyone.

TequilaMockingbirdy Sat 10-May-14 18:49:14

I'm not bothered at all. I have a photo of me on my profile, tell people my name and I'm careful to say nothing that could get me into trouble. I also have mnetters on Facebook.

Some people really need to be careful though if they want to remain anon!

Rochiana54 Sat 10-May-14 20:36:10

The farce

Apologies if I offended you. That was not my intention.

OddBoots Sat 10-May-14 20:41:48

I don't write anything here I wouldn't want linked to me - I've posted about things I know make me identifiable but I'm happy with that, it keeps me on the straight and narrow.

tigerdriverII Sat 10-May-14 20:42:41

I spotted a client of mine on here once. I'd given her some legal advice she didn't like and she posted the same question on Employment Issues. I didn't respond on the thread obviously but I was pleased to see that everyone agreed with what I had said ( of course).

GreenEyedGoblin Sat 10-May-14 20:44:24

I've been on mn for quite a while now, but am a serial name every week or so usually.

I think it's scary how much you can give away about yourself. Before mn I was a regular on another parenting forum before it got shite

There are a couple of mnnetters that I actually recognise from there because of identifiable usernames and kids names/jobs etc.

One in particular is now fairly anonymous on MN...but I could tell you where she lives, her kids names and ages, her job, her relationship history, and I would recognise either her or her kids on the street. She would have no idea who I am. I find that really, really weird and not something I would want for myself (I am not a stalker btw! All things that were picked up from her being a regular on the other site)

hotcrosshunny Sat 10-May-14 20:45:27

I don't think there as many mumsnetters as we think so the risk is low fingers crossed

LRDtheFeministDragon Sat 10-May-14 20:46:22

I wouldn't mind people on MN figuring out who I am in RL. Quite a lot of MNers know me in RL anyway.

I wouldn't be so keen on it the other way around - I wouldn't post the way I post if you could google my RL name and come straight to my MN threads. To find me on here, someone would need to be a MNer. I think quite a lot of people seem to feel similarly? Else why would we go to meetups and so on?

Skina Sat 10-May-14 20:46:22

I don't put anything particularly specific on here, and if I needed to post for help/thoughts, I'd name change and perhaps alter details.

Summerbreezing Sat 10-May-14 22:03:59

I nc frequently and also change small details of events if I think someone might recognise me. I have also never told anyone I post on Mumsnet. (Hopefully I've covered my tracks).

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