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To find these episodes of Location Location Location very funny

(210 Posts)
Summerbreezing Fri 09-May-14 09:37:26

The ones where the couple want a house 'full of character', so Kirstie shows them a quirky cottage, a cleverly restored barn, and an old mellow farmhouse; which are all rejected on the grounds of 'too near the road', 'not enough garden', 'nowhere to store our six racing bikes' etc.

The couple then go off and 'discover' a three bedroom semi in a gated development at the edge of the village, put in a 'cheeky offer' and buy it. A few months later Kirstie has to go around for a visit and ooh and aah at their John Lewis sofa and homebase cushions and decking out the back and tell them how 'clever' they've been and how the made 'the decision that was right for them', and all the time you can almost see the bubble over her head thinking "WTF? shock. That lovely cottage was twenty grand less that this boring box".

Disclaimer: Can't afford to live in beautiful old farmhouse with antique furniture myself so not mocking semis and homebase. But I just saw a repeat of one of those programmes and it made me smile.

thenightsky Fri 09-May-14 09:41:00

ahahha... infuriating people, but you have to laugh. I remember one where the woman shushed everyone, cupped her ear and said 'listen.. I can hear traffic'. A faint distant hum apparently. You could see Kirsty and Phil trying not to piss themselves.

CogitoErgoSometimes Fri 09-May-14 09:41:23

YANBU I think the format is hilarious. Baffling when the couple are standing in some farmhouse kitchen big enough to park a jumbo jet and they look round with a sneer and say 'it's a bit pokey'. confused

Chivesmum Fri 09-May-14 09:42:20

It's the ones where they go 'oooo it's quite poky isn't it' when the living room is larger than my ground floor and they have a field for a garden!!!! Ggggrrr

Wishfulmakeupping Fri 09-May-14 09:42:34

I love Location x3, but this always happens! People make the strangest choices on there. I'm always envy and hmm at the budgets though- seriously you are in your 20's with a budget of 350k plus how?! How?! <and breathe>
I do love Kirsty though I want to see her rock up in a pair of jeans one episode though just for the shock value smile

itsmeitscathy Fri 09-May-14 09:42:56

I adore Location, Location, Location - that's exactly why.

Plus I love Kirstie and Phil.

BEEwitched Fri 09-May-14 09:45:54

I'm not from the UK, we bought a 3-bed semi box last year and I find the small rooms hard to get used to sometimes - so what usually happens to me is, Kirsty shows them a house that's quite nice, then you see the bedroom and/or the downstairs office and I think "oh, that is so small" and she and the people ooh and aah and go 'oh, that's a generous space'!

Disclaimer: a standard double bed where I'm from is 2mx2m so you can imagine bedroom sizes are different!

LaurieFairyCake Fri 09-May-14 09:48:47

It brings out my inner jealous bitch - I do give her hoose room much

700k to spend when they're in their 20's - fuck ofv

Stinkle Fri 09-May-14 09:53:37

I love watching this. The people on there make me laugh.

I was watching one a little while ago when they rejected the most beautiful house on the grounds that the family bathroom was too small.

There was a downstairs loo and an en-suite. The bathroom had all the required elements - loo, bath and sink, plus a separate stand in shower plus room to swing quite a few cats.

What exactly do they do in there?

No wonder these people haven't found anything having already views 100s of houses. Phil & Kirsty must have the patience of several saints

Pobblewhohasnotoes Fri 09-May-14 09:53:49

I love it!

The people on it drive me nuts though with their £150k budget but they want a five bed detached with massive garden, dining kitchen, no traffic noise and only on one particular road and a commute of ten minutes. Then can't understand why that's unachievable. Compromise? What's compromise!

Or the ones that have a million to spend but just can't find anything! Oh how hard life must be!

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Fri 09-May-14 09:54:03

We love Location and the bonkers buyers grin

Mrsjayy Fri 09-May-14 09:56:35

I watched one that they wanted quirky Phil showed them loft flat doodah nah too quirky , he then showed them a a lovely split level livingroom upstairs place, NAH no heart in it, they ended up putting that cheky offer into the middle of London apparentment they could have went and looked at themselves, with a silly balcony and square rooms,

escape to the country does my head in, the beautiful farm house 3 reception rooms blah blah, oh the sun doesn't come into this room at 2 pm BUGGER OFF YOU TWAT

Stinkle Fri 09-May-14 09:56:35

It's Escape to the Country that makes me confused the most.

People seem to think they can sell their 3 bed semi in town and buy a 10 bed mansion with land "in the country" for the same money.

x2boys Fri 09-May-14 09:56:59

Ah I love these programmes especially when they rave on about what such good value for money it is for only £700,000 you get all of this BTW I would never be able to afford anything like £700,000 unless I win the lottery! I also love it when they say I know/ you only have a budget of £250,000 but we have found this great home for just £400,000 because people can just magically come up with an extra £150,000!

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Fri 09-May-14 09:59:06

Escape to the Country pisses me right off - there's never updates and they never actually buy any where, I'm sure they just for a jolly day out!

We sold our first floor flat in London and bought a 3 bed in the country grin Not a mansion!

Pobblewhohasnotoes Fri 09-May-14 09:59:16

I love how on escape to the country they always make them do some crap activity and have to pretend to be interested and ask questions.

Mrsjayy Fri 09-May-14 10:00:19

Place in the sun home or away (is that what it is called) is one of my favourites, wander along a spanish beach with 100,0 euro in their pocket and they want beach front they end up with a holiday apartment grin

Mrsjayy Fri 09-May-14 10:01:06

love how on escape to the country they always make them do some crap activity and have to pretend to be interested and ask questions.

yes cos i am sure all country folk do sausage making on a tuesday afternoon

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Fri 09-May-14 10:01:12

My parents used professional relocates when they moved abroad and they were USELESS! Phil and Kirsty they were not grin

Stinkle Fri 09-May-14 10:02:30

I've never seen anyone buy anything on Place in the Sun. I'm sure they go on that for a freebie few days away.

And Wanted Down Under, most of them have never been to Australia, know nothing about Australia but it's always been their "dream for a better quality of life". Then they find out it's just same shit - better weather

Pobblewhohasnotoes Fri 09-May-14 10:03:34

yes cos i am sure all country folk do sausage making on a tuesday afternoon

We do. Along with glass blowing on a Wednesday and stained glass window making on Thursdays.

Mrsjayy Fri 09-May-14 10:04:26

there was a couple on Place in the sun a few months ago one of the men had lived in teneriffe for years but wanted the woman to find him a house, he just wanted on telly and somebody to try and get him a deal,

ColdTeaAgain Fri 09-May-14 10:07:14

Haha yes love those moments on Location where you can tell K and P are dying to tell them how stupid they're being but have to be polite.

Hate Escape To Country because I'm jealous because it always seems to have a couple with pots of cash and NOTHING they see is ever good enough. "Oh but it doesn't have a separate outbuilding for my pottery hobby." Fucking build one then!!

SomethingAboutNothing Fri 09-May-14 10:08:06

I love LLL, Kirstie and Phil are fab!

I worked with someone whose in laws had been on Escape to the Country, they bought one of the houses they were shown and are very happily living the country dream with pigs in their back garden smile

nochips Fri 09-May-14 10:10:40

My favourite Location one was the couple with the list of 36critical items, including a gravel circular drive. Phill found them a house which fit EVERY SINGLE ITEM and the woman rejected it based on....... there was only one road leading to the house and she might 'get bored' driving the same road every day.

What a time waster.

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