I'm about 12 weeks pregnant following a missed miscarriage at 13 weeks at the beginning of this year. I'll put the disclaimer in here that I realise I am completely obsessing and this is probably an irritating post but I'm just so frustrated.
First things first, I had cramping and minor spotting at 6ish weeks. I was aghast and convinced I was losing this baby, too. I finally got an appointment at an EPU at 7 weeks and had an internal scan, which I quickly discovered was by a student (I wasn't asked to consent), who tried to insert the probe into my anus twice and then very brutally shoved it into the correct orifice without so much as a cursory wipe. I was so taken aback by the fact she found a heartbeat I barely had a chance to think about how to respond to the violation or to really look at the screen.
Fast forward a couple of weeks and my tummy had really popped (uterus palpable halfway between pubis and belly button) and sickness had hit full force. It got me to thinking whether the spotting and cramps was thanks to a twin, vanishing or not. I pulled out the pic the tech had given me and see something but it isn't clearly a second sac - see pic, bottom right. I thought perhaps it's conceivable that my evidently unqualified sonographer might have missed something at this early stage. I certainly didn't get any explanation at the EPU - just the usual 'there can sometimes be pain and bleeding in pregnancy that's normal' chat. I have since gone google crazy and discovered other pics at 7 weeks for twins that look similar, also for vanishing twins, also for bleeds. I've posted the pic elsewhere and got little response and thought I'd just wait for my next scan and perhaps get some answers, but even though I booked early at about 7 weeks (and my MW confirms she put in scan request then) I rang up the us department yesterday having not for a date through and the reception said she just booked me for a week and a half from now!
Now I know it is ridiculous but every day feels excruciating, I just want answers. If there's a bleed that's potentially a risk, I want to know. If there's a twin, obviously I want to know! If there was a vanishing twin, I'd still want to know and to value that life as I did the last baby I lost. The more time elapses, the less likely it is I'll get those answers (it may well be reabsorbed).
AIBU to be so het up that I can't seem to get any answers? That I have to wait so long?! (I suspect yes - but can someone please give me an opinion on the pic?!) also that I think early pregnancy care can be so effing insensitive? I pleaded with the us receptionist for a cancellation to have my scan closer to 12 weeks on account of being worried due to the MMC and she was so rude and cold!
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To want some answers?! Pic attached
38 replies
Mashoona88 · 29/04/2014 11:50
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