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to wonder why people treat babies' weights as a competition?

(75 Posts)
Macocious Wed 23-Apr-14 18:46:28

So I was in a cafe today and overheard a woman talking about posting on Facebook that her baby was in the 75th centile for weight. She said her cousin commented something along the lines of "Wow, 75th centile? My baby is in the 2nd". She said to her friends "I thought, 2nd centile?! Does that even exist? How is your baby even alive?!"

What a stupid comment to make! My baby is small and looks very much alive to me. Don't some people realise they need to learn when to keep their bloody mouths shut? AIBU?

Sparklingbrook Wed 23-Apr-14 18:55:07

I know what you mean. Even average isn't any good for some people either. It's really annoying.

Luckily as they get older and the red book gets shoved in a cupboard nobody even mentions centiles.


Ruushii Wed 23-Apr-14 18:55:49

But it is a competition.

My baby is the biggest and fattest so NER NER NER

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye Wed 23-Apr-14 18:58:20

My 'friend' weaned her baby at 2 months and was shoving peanut butter on toast in her mouth at 4 months so her baby would get as fat as possible.

Is a competition for some.

I have no idea what these centile things even mean.

FrancesNiadova Wed 23-Apr-14 18:58:38

I don't know why people are competitive about anything regarding babies: rolling over, sleeping through the night, crawling, walking, 1st words etc. It's completely bonkers. Each baby is beautiful & wonderful, celebrate rather than compete.

Kveta Wed 23-Apr-14 18:58:48

And length. Competition over who has the longest baby can get quite heated! It is ridiculous.

Tambajam Wed 23-Apr-14 18:59:38

I work supporting mums who breastfeed and often mums with 'fatter' babies are just as tearful and worried about it as the mums with teenier babies.

Sparklingbrook Wed 23-Apr-14 19:00:00

I must measure DS1 (14) and see where he is on the centiles. I think the red book goes up to Age 20 IIRC. grin

PeachandRaspberry Wed 23-Apr-14 19:00:52

I think in your example they were clumsily commenting that the baby is actually very small, no?

TheScience Wed 23-Apr-14 19:02:10

People are weirdly competitive about how fat your baby is, how early you can wean them and how young you put them in forward facing car seats grin

Then of course once they are toddlers you want a slim one who taught themselves to read by their 3rd birthday...

HandragsNGladbags Wed 23-Apr-14 19:02:40

Don't worry, by the time they hit toddlerdom the competition is whose child is skinniest and tallest. Fat is only acceptable in babies ime.

It's all complete bollocks obviously.

chocchips Wed 23-Apr-14 19:04:54

My 21mo dd is 25th centile for weight and I am constantly reminded how she is behind my friends dd when she was the same age (friends dd is 4month older). Really really f**king annoying!

IWillOnlyEatBeans Wed 23-Apr-14 19:08:01

My sister is totally delighted that her 9 month old is roughly the same size as my 15 month old. She keeps asking me to weigh him so she 'can compare properly'.

It's all a bit odd, YANBU

Nocomet Wed 23-Apr-14 19:08:27

Utter bollocks, both mine were 6lbish
As teens both of them are taller than me, the lighter is a size 12 and the heavier a 6

rabbitrisen Wed 23-Apr-14 19:11:44

Agreed Handrags.
Suddenly you look at your own baby and think, uh oh.

phantomnamechanger Wed 23-Apr-14 19:12:33

My 1st baby was 9 lb 13.5 oz at birth! Do I win? grin

I didn't feel like I'd won much when she was being yanked out, nor when I could not wee for 3 days and needed a blood transfusion due to fainting from being very anaemic due to heavy blood loss. Of course she was gorgeous but TBH I would not have minded her being a few lb lighter and easier to deliver!

As with all these daft competitive things (and you will hear oh so many) either nod and smile, or ignore.

FengMa Wed 23-Apr-14 19:12:58

Not a stealth gloat, but I get a bit frustrated with EVERYONE I meet (stranger or no) commenting on how big my boy is for his age, as I did on people commenting on my enormous bump. Didn't anyone's Mum teach them that it's weird/rude to pass comment on people's bodies (unless to point out its striking resemblance to Elle MacPherson)?!

TSSDNCOP Wed 23-Apr-14 19:16:11

Phantom I'll raise you 10lb 4oz

My undercarriage was like the Bayeux tapestry sad

Thouneedsbedamned Wed 23-Apr-14 19:19:04


DS was in the 97th percentile for height at birth.

He is a just above average height at 9 years old.

I got sick to the back teeth of people saying "oooh he will be a tall one wont he?" I have no bloody idea, he is 7 days old!

I am a shade over 5ft and his father is 6 foot fucking 4 it could go either way.

phantomnamechanger Wed 23-Apr-14 19:19:40

TSS god yes, I forgot to mention the episiotomy and the bloomin stinging stitches. Still went on to do it again, eventually.

was very hmm and shockat tales of people being back in action in the bedroom within days <hollow laughter>

happy2bhomely Wed 23-Apr-14 19:19:52

One of my five weighed 11lbs when he was born. The only competition I noticed was everyone hinting at how much more bucket like my fanny must be compared to theirs!

Thouneedsbedamned Wed 23-Apr-14 19:21:50

happy Who the fucking hell says bollocks like that? What a set of twats. (Pardon the pun)

JimbosJetSet Wed 23-Apr-14 19:26:06

DD has been on the 99.6% line pretty much from day 1. My NCT group would have the 'who's got the heaviest baby' competition between themselves and ignore me and DD! I promise I never gloated - I didnt do anything special to get a big baby, and I never understood the issue with weight. She is now 3.5 years and still on the same percentile but not hugely tall, so I am now rather concerned that she will always be big, but not in a good way. There is definitely an advantage, in my eyes, to having a baby that is not particularly high up on the graphs in their red book.

Goldenbear Wed 23-Apr-14 19:26:44

Where I live the overriding false pride is around having small babies and skinny, small toddlers. There is a strong element of lentil weavery and although not ALWAYS said I think people believe the smaller baby is indicative of the breast fed baby and 'evil' formula is associated with the chubbier baby. These sentiments are still demonstrated at infants school- for example at the recent school Easter Egg Hunt, lots of parents were surprised and expressed concern over the chocolate bunny reward!

happy2bhomely Wed 23-Apr-14 19:28:18

Seriously, you would not believe the comments I got. Apparently, my DH would no longer be able to feel the sides. I would cough the next one out. Charming stuff hey?

DS had a 40 ish cm head and the broadest shoulders. He was a home birth, and to be honest, did do me a fair bit of damage internally despite not needing a single stitch. The comments were not appreciated.

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