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AIBU?

To be sad I might have a dairy intolerance?

54 replies

MsMarvel · 22/04/2014 12:43

For the last while (if I'm perfectly honest, it's been a few years now) that I've been noticing a bad reaction to dairy products.

It's usually more noticeable if I'm eating out, for example I can't have carbonara if I'm out for dinner, or any other rich creamy sauces. A cheese burger will disagree with me as well. I'll end up vomiting a few hours after eating, as well as my stomach churning for the whole of the following day.

I've tried to just put up with it and pretend it's normal, but I seem to be constantly either feeling sick or actually vomiting, so have realised that I need to cut out dairy. But it makes me sad that there's going to be so many things I can't have any more. Also, how strict do I need to be? Should I go to the doctors about the stomach pain and vomiting first, or will they just tell me to cut out dairy and see how I get on?

Any tips on the best way to cut out dairy without having a complicated diet?

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Impatientismymiddlename · 22/04/2014 12:46

It isn't that difficult once you get used to it. My child is allergic to dairy, wheat and nuts any he can still eat a very varied diet.
Visit your doctor and let him know that you are going to try an exclusion test diet and then just go for it. Just be sure to check the label on everything as lots of things have small amounts of dairy.

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MsMarvel · 22/04/2014 12:51

It's little things that I'll really miss though. I love milky tea and don't think I could get used to having it without milk.

So I would need to avoid milk, cheese, cream, is yoghurt ok?

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Impatientismymiddlename · 22/04/2014 12:54

You would also need to avoid butter and normal margarine. Lots of processed foods have milk in too (things that you wouldn't expect).
You can just use soya milk or rice milk in your tea or you could try lacto free if it is the lactose that you are allergic to rather than the dairy.
They also do substitute cheeses and dairy free margarine. There isn't anything that you need to miss out on, you just need to get used to the slightly different taste.
You can even get dairy free chocolate.

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AryaOfHouseSnark · 22/04/2014 12:54

Do you think it's lactose you have the intolerance too ? You can buy lactose free dairy products now. So all may not be lost.
But no yanbu to be sad about it. There are so many creature comforts we all take for comfort that when we can't have them you really feel it.

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FizzyPink · 22/04/2014 12:54

You really need to see a dietician. I had to cut out dairy when I was 15 but to be fair I'd never drunk milk or anything like that anyway so it wasn't really a big deal for me. It depends on your allergy what you need to cut out. Some people have a lactose intolerance while others are allergic to another milk protein. You need to have an allergy test before you cut out foods.
For the future, I find taking the time to work out what 'normal' things are safe means I can usually find something to eat when out and not have to carry around dairy free snacks.

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Impatientismymiddlename · 22/04/2014 12:55

Yoghurt had to be avoided too as yoghurt is essentially a milk product. But you can get soya yogurts.

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MsMarvel · 22/04/2014 12:57

Hadn't thought about butter, thank you for adding that one! Which substitute milk tastes closest to really milk? Will get something to keep at work because that's where I drink all my tea!

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Impatientismymiddlename · 22/04/2014 12:57

You need to have an allergy test before you cut out foods.

That isn't always true as some dieticians recommend an exclusion test diet instead as not everybody who has an allergy shows up enough of the ige antibodies on allergy tests, but they still have obvious allergy symptoms.

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DoJo · 22/04/2014 13:03

If you are lactose intolerant, then the Lactofree products are just milk without lactose, so they taste exactly like milk and you can even get little one-serving pouches which you can take out with you to places where you think you might be offered a cup of tea. The cheese is a little bland, but if you like Edam etc, then it has a similar texture and taste, and they do cream cheese as well if you like that, which can be a good way to substitute cheese in cooking. Their yoghurts taste like normal ones too. It's all a bit more expensive, but it does last and Tesco often have offers so you could stock up when it's cheaper.

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ilovepowerhoop · 22/04/2014 13:05

You could try excluding lactose first and then if no difference you could cut out all dairy

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quietbatperson · 22/04/2014 13:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MsMarvel · 22/04/2014 13:08

Right I've booked a doctors appointment for next Monday, Is it better to avoid dairy now, or eat as normal in case they want to do any tests next week?

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quietbatperson · 22/04/2014 13:09

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Pagwatch · 22/04/2014 13:10

Dairy allergy isn't too bad. Perfectly nice alternatives to ice cream, butter etc etc.
I am currently shadowing DDs allergies which involves gluten and soya and nuts and raw egg too . It is amazing how quickly you get used to things. My palate is changing so I don't miss many things now.

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quietbatperson · 22/04/2014 13:11

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mistlethrush · 22/04/2014 13:14

Some dieticians are hopeless - one told me I couldn't be lactose intollerant as I had not been formally diagnosed and that as I could eat yoghurt and cheese I wasn't - whereas I can get away with cheese and yoghurt and can't cope with milk (and this is any type of milk inc. goat and sheeps) - and this is a well-recognised form of lactose intolerance.

However, what you describe sounds much close to what a friend has - which is an intollerance to cows milk - if he eats something that has it in it bounces within the hour. He is lucky as he just needs to avoid cows milk - but can have sheep, goat and buffalo milk products.

To work out what you can have, go totally dairy free (in terms of milk products - should be find on eggs!) and once fully fit, add just one thing in, possibly starting with goats milk products, and start wiht things like yoghurt or cheese and don't try anything else new for a week, but if you're OK, add another item of that type in. Leave cows milk to last. Hopefully you might find that you can eat some of these things - you could try lacto-free products if you think that might be the issue.

There are lots of alternatives of course, but you will have to find one that you can cope with the taste of.

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MsMarvel · 22/04/2014 13:16

But if I exclude it myself and notice a difference, what else will they be able to do other than say 'cool, keep it up'?

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mistlethrush · 22/04/2014 13:17

Nothing. That's what I've done the past 30 years.

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Impatientismymiddlename · 22/04/2014 13:20

If you exclude it and see a Difference why would you need a doctor to do anything?
The best confirmation is one that you can try and test and no for sure exists. The best test is the one which you can do yourself.
Medical tests do have their uses, but even they are not 100%.

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blueseashore · 22/04/2014 13:22

In response to your milky tea question, I have found Koko milk (coconut based milk) the best in tea and coffee.

I am currently dairy and soya free as breastfeeding my cows milk protein/ soya intolerant DS and you get used to it. Totally fine at home, bit of a pain when eating out though.

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Impatientismymiddlename · 22/04/2014 13:22

Oh any my child was officially tested after being gluten. No dairy free for over 3 years. His ige reactions came back as being off the scale and the doctor immediately said he needed an epipen and needed to carry it at all times. Having the test didn't change anything though as we already knew he had the allergies and were already very careful.
So in answer: going dairy free now will not affect any tests that the doctor wants to do.

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whois · 22/04/2014 13:23

As people have said, there is a difference between being lactose intolerant and having a dairy allergy.

Lactose intolerance is totally easy to manage because things that just have trace in probably won't affect you. Most people are fine with plain yogurt (probably not the 'creamy' ones) and can tolerate a little bit of hard cheese because the lactose levels are low. Lactose is harder to digest with fat (aparently) so ice cream and soft cheeses are worse. Cream a massive no no. Marge is unlikely to affect you if you are lactose intoerent.

You can buy lacy offer products anyway, and also things like goats cheese ice cream and abviosult goats cheese as cheese! Also there are lots of dairy free milk and cream substitutes (soya, almond, oat).

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sashh · 22/04/2014 13:24

Is it dairy or lactose intolerance?

If it is lactose you can probably (most people can) tolerate a certain amount incorporated in to other food so a bit of cream in potatoes fine - carbonara not so much.

Also you can actually buy the enzymes at health food shops, might be worth trying.

It is also worth trying goats' milk.

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dancersdad · 22/04/2014 13:43

DW was diagnosed with anorexia-triggered lactose intolerance, which we were told would fade with recovery. That was two years ago.

There's really not a lot you can't eat on a lactose-free diet, you just have to make sure you're using soya/lacto-free alternatives and do a lot more of your own cooking. DD and I are more or less lactose free by convenience.

With DW she was put on a controlled diet in which everything she was potentially having a reaction to was cut out and then reintroduced to find the culprit, but the circumstances were different.

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WilsonFrickett · 22/04/2014 13:47

Both the things you mention making you sick (spaghetti and burger) contain wheat/gluten and are very rich. I don't think excluding dairy or lactose will do you any harm, and might give you some insight into what's causing your problems, but you might be barking up the wrong tree altogether so keep an open mind.

could just as easily be IBS, or simply that you can't take very rich food.

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