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To think you shouldn't constantly TALK to someone who is reading a book?

(60 Posts)
AwfulMaureen Tue 15-Apr-14 23:13:47

Staying at my Mum's for the past week prior to moving into new place. We talk all day long as she only works in the morning for a couple of hours...we're together a lot.

in the evening, I sometimes try to read while she watches her tv shows...she keeps bloody talking to me intermittently!

lessonsintightropes Wed 16-Apr-14 16:58:28

<hides behind thatbloodywoman>

ThatBloodyWoman Wed 16-Apr-14 16:51:24

Twas a little unnerving Objection

<edges away>

Objection Wed 16-Apr-14 16:47:40

Crikey, its light hearted to post that once but vaguely threatening twice.
Computer malfunction, sorry!

Objection Wed 16-Apr-14 16:40:33

Kill her.

Objection Wed 16-Apr-14 16:40:31

Kill her.

lessonsintightropes Wed 16-Apr-14 16:38:06

I knew DH was a keeper when he let me read uninterrupted. YANBU.

ThatBloodyWoman Wed 16-Apr-14 15:12:54

I listen politely to the first couple of interruptions, then announce 'can you ve quiet now,I'm trying to read'.
I don't pussyfoot around.I give a clear request.
If they continue to talk, I then glare and tell them to shut up.

SuburbanRhonda Wed 16-Apr-14 15:08:51

If I'm reading and someone interrupts, I put my finger on the sentence I'm reading and look up distractedly, to let them know I'm going back within seconds to my more interesting pursuit.

DH knows the look and has learned not to bother trying to engage me when I'm reading grin

Oldraver Wed 16-Apr-14 15:05:24

My OH and DS still does, interrupt or look over my shoulder when I'm on the laptop. I've trained OH out of it and its an ongoing work with DS.. To me its not different from reading a book but they seem to think its ok to interrupt, OH is a big book reader and he wouldn't like constant interuptions but a screen seems fair game

rumbleinthrjungle Wed 16-Apr-14 15:00:16

This is why I only read in the bath where I can lock the door and get some peace!

My DM also has this brilliant habit of inviting me to watch a film with her, putting the film on and then talking to me about completely unrelated things the entire way through it. Then asking at the end if I enjoyed the film.

"No idea Mum, I didn't hear one word of it."

Jjou Wed 16-Apr-14 14:49:26

DH gets miffed if I 'ignore' him by reading a book. Conversely, on the rare occasions he's engrossed in a book he gives me a blow-by-blow account of exactly what's happening in his at any given time.
Drives me batty!

kentishgirl Wed 16-Apr-14 12:15:34

I'm from a reading family so don't think it's rude to read around other people when you are both just chilling out doing your own things.

Ex used to get really annoyed by it (twat) although he was only glued to Sky or Fox news on TV continually, and actually had no interest in talking to me either.

New chap is a reader! Thank God! I think it would have been a dealbreaker otherwise, having experienced living with a non-reader.

ThePrisonerOfAzkaban Wed 16-Apr-14 12:05:33


I used to read 2-3 books a week since I've been with my dp I've not got though 1! In 2 years, every time I try to read I keep on getting interrupted and give up on the book!

AntiDistinctlyMinty Wed 16-Apr-14 11:53:22

Early on in our relationship DH stayed over on a Saturday night. I woke up before him so sat up and started reading my book. He got up about ten minutes later, went and made a pot of tea and got back into bed with his own book. We sat there for hours just reading together. I knew right there that he was the man for me grin

DF on the other hand constantly interrupts reading/tv when they come to stay - it drives me (and DM) up the wall!

AMumInScotland Wed 16-Apr-14 11:24:32

YANBU. If one person is watching the TV, and another person wants to read a book, why shouldn't they be able to coexist in the same room? The idea that you ought to go to another room because you're not bein 'social' is a red herring. You can be sociably quiet together, and involved in your own pursuits, while still in the same room.

I'm trying to remember a quote from something I read once where, in the main character's family, picking up a book was seen as a 'cry for help' in that, if you were reduced to doing something so incredibly boring, you must actually be looking for attention, so they would all immediatley try to find you something 'better' to do with your time.

TulipOHare Wed 16-Apr-14 11:15:30

YANBU. Have experienced this before with flatmates and it's bloody irritating. Luckily I am from a family of readers so don't get it from them. It's not unusual (at Christmas, family get-togethers etc) for us all to be sitting around in silence each engrossed in a book. It's not rude, it is peaceful and relaxing.

Grennie Wed 16-Apr-14 10:35:29

I think if you are only visiting for a fortnight, YABU.

pictish Wed 16-Apr-14 10:33:21

sgb - I'm not sure it's a gender thing. I talk to dh when he's WoWing, much to his consternation sometimes, and OP says it's her mum that's guilty.
We're mostly women who live with men, so stands to reason our complaints would take that direction. I think men very likely complain of the same...talking during football/reading/WoW.

FunkyBoldRibena Wed 16-Apr-14 10:31:55

See I also read in the bath or go to bed to read as my OH watches sports and shouts or mutters constantly at the TV - he isn't trying to interrupt me but it's so annoying and I need peace and quiet when I read.

FunkyBoldRibena Wed 16-Apr-14 10:30:23

Can you wait until her TV show starts and then start talking about your book/friends she doesn't know/some random celeb she doesn't like, loudly. Shut up when the adverts are on [or if she presses 'pause'] and then start up each time she starts watching it. When she says 'do hush up dear' explain nicely that she has been doing the same to you and you just want to read!

Kerosene Wed 16-Apr-14 10:23:57

If DH hadn't interrupted my reading, we'd never have got together. OTOH, I was reading at the bus stop, which is a less focused experience to reading on the sofa.

He knows the rules now. Besides, it's nice for us to be able to be in the same space, even if we're doing different things. You don't have to be constantly talking to enjoy each other's presence.

Our flatmate, however, is another story. "Oooh, what are you reading? Is it good? What's it about? I once read a book like that, but it was about something completely different and the cover was red or maybe it was blue? The main character was a man that thought he was a dragon, and they played space football with severed heads...."
Dude. I've got my headphones on, nose in a book. The main light is off and I've just got the reading light on. I'm only in the living room because DH is playing a videogame (with you! He's waiting for you to get back!) that involves lots of shouting at each other over the network and our computers are in the bedroom. None of this is a signal of being open for conversation.

SolidGoldBrass Wed 16-Apr-14 10:01:31

I wonder how gendered this is. Given that there is a general perception that if a woman is doing something and a man comes into the room, she is supposed to turn her attention to him immediately...

shoppingbagsundereyes Wed 16-Apr-14 09:57:59

My dh does this. I only get my kindle out in the evenings if he is watching something I'm not interested in. He then comments on the programme I'm not watching while I'm trying to read. I tend to go to bed.

ScrambledEggAndToast Wed 16-Apr-14 09:45:02

Slightly different but my DP will talk to me when I am watching my favourite shows about the most inane thing even when he can see I am engrossed. It will usually be something along the lines on "mum and dad's next door neighbour's grandson is off to Majorca in October". Big wow, I have never met this persongrin

Seeing as I have about 3 programmes that I really like you would think he would let me watch them in peace. When the rugby is on, I let him watch it quietly as I know he enjoys it. Grrrr.

Callani Wed 16-Apr-14 09:32:08

YANBU - the worst thing? When someone sees you reading and says "seeing as you're not doing anything, will you just..."

Drives me mad! Actually, I am doing something, I'm reading!

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