Told to put my 'podge' away!

[junkfoodaddict]

Today I went to PIL for Sunday dinner. I was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and dining room, leaning back in an informal manner whilst keeping check on my sleeping 2 year old in our car through the kitchen window.
FIL (he's 85 coming up) was sitting in his chair and rather rudely told me to 'put it away'. I turned to look, frowned and confused and he continued to say 'put your podge away! You look like you're carrying one!'
At first I was gobsmacked (mouth literally fell open) and my MIL shouted from the kitchen telling him to shut up and stop being rude. He continued to say he can say that because 'She's my DIL'. MIL then turned to me and said he was so rude, to which I replied 'yes, it is cheeky to say something like that'.
I was sooooooooooooooooo mad! 85 or not, he, nor anyone else has the bloody right to give an opinion on the size of my stomach when it hasn't been asked for and certainly not in an uncouth manner as his!!!!
Rant over!

[ThatOtherTime]

Grrrr, what is it with some older men that makes them think they can say anything they want.
I guess some have a reason such as mild dementia or whatever but some are just rude. like my dad

[Floggingmolly]

Ill mannered old bugger!

[Pumpkinpositive]

Well, assuming dementia is not a consideration, and he's one of these sorts who likes to "tell it as it is", no need for you to stand on ceremony with him, is there?

Anything about his appearance you think could be improved by a blank cheque made out to Harley St?

[OurMiracle1106]

At least your MIL told him to stop being rude he probably got an earful after you left

[Tryingtobetidy]

YANBU

[MammaTJ]

If he can give it out, he also has to take it! Feel free to be honest with him about all his failings in future, after all, you are his DIL!

[FunnysInLaJardin]

God, my Dad was like this. His Alzheimers is a blessing sometimes I tell you! Rude old people can just fuck off IMO

[Mrswellyboot]

I would have got in the car and smiled sweetly and said 'oops, I forgot to get my phone'

Then I would have gone somewhere nice with the baby :)

I'm not even joking.

[PansOnFire]

He sounds like a twat; don't get mad, get even :) Since he's your FIL you can speak to him in any way you please, he's just confirmed that himself.

[WooWooOwl]

Was there something on show that you probably should have put away though?

[LEMmingaround]

well if your screen name is anything to go by??? i say this as a reformed junkfood addict! But yes, very rude.

[LEMmingaround]

err, recently reformed and i probably have more podge to put away than you do!!!

[Yambabe]

more unreasonable to leave a small child asleep in a car in this warm weather imho......

[pointythings]

I'd be saying something along the lines of 'get your wrinkled snout out of my face'...

[Twilightsparklesmama]

What yambabe said without the ''in this warm weather' part

[southeastastra]

i'd have told him to fuck off quite frankly

[RandomInternetStranger]

I'd have told him to shove his walking stick up his backside which apparently you can say being his DIL...!

[Financeprincess]

I'd write it off as old bloke stupidity. At least your MIL told him to shut up. She obviously takes no nonsense from him!

Younger men are much less likely to carry on like this. That is progress!

I had a summer job when I was 19, in my university vacation. I remember being in the canteen one day and going to get some ice cream after lunch. One of the older blokes - quite senior - said, "you'll put on weight eating that", in a reproving way, as if that was the only thing I should have been concerned about. I didn't know how to deal with it then, but if it happened now I'd let him have it!

[member]

I'd have reminded him that I'd have a big say in his care arrangements in the coming years [nasty]

[devoniandarling]

This is very rude, but does remind me of watching a workshop my dd attended for ballet where the teacher told one of the (rather larger) girls to "put her lunch away". She meant to pull her tummy in and pull "up" but my mother nearly choked!

[C3P0]

Loss of executive function is a well established feature of the initial stages of dementia. It's likely that he simply lacks the capacity to moderate his behaviour. Be patient. You may well end up like that one day.