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AIBU?

About Mother's Day!

55 replies

ilovemydoggy · 30/03/2014 16:07

I have just seen a post on Facebook about someone moaning that they didn't get breakfast in bed and only got a card and bunch of flowers! I'm sure there's more on here and people will be upset about what I am saying. But don't these people know that they are lucky enough to be celebrating Mother's Day and the best present they was even given was their children. There is plenty of childless women out there today who wishes that they had someone to call them mummy! Rant over.

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SilverOldie · 30/03/2014 16:20

Very well said Ilovemydoggy. I was going to start a similar thread but you beat me to it.

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WorraLiberty · 30/03/2014 16:20

YANBU

It grinds my gears to read all the diva stuff from grown women.

My 2 nieces will be having a shit Mother's Day again because their Mum (my Sister) died suddenly on Mother's Day when they were only 8 and 9yrs old.

They've already had to struggle through March 25th (the date she died) but as it was also Mother's Day 13yrs ago, it's like there are 2 anniversaries of her death to get through.

They learnt a long time ago to stay off the internet around this time...to prevent them reading all the ungrateful whiny crap.

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gordyslovesheep · 30/03/2014 16:23

oh Worra that's so sad x

I totally agree btw - I can't abide the way adult women suddenly turn into petulant children over the lack of tat being thrust upon them because they produced a child

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Joules68 · 30/03/2014 16:25

Plenty of divas on mumsnet today!!

Ridiculous.

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PPPpickUPaPenguin · 30/03/2014 16:26

I started a thread, saying how blessed I feel. YANBU.

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Lovethebubbles · 30/03/2014 16:27

Totally agree! Someone very close to me is going through IVF so in my opinion all mothers should be thankful to have their beautiful children. I also feel for all the people who have lost their mum's. People should be more careful about what they post on Facebook.

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Perfectlypurple · 30/03/2014 16:28

I 'only' got a card and flowers from my dsd. That's plenty in my opinion. She is a teenager so no getting up early! However it was her decision, unprompted to get me flowers and in the card she put a nice message thanking me for everything I do for her. It's lovely that she thinks to do this herself.

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sarahandmallard · 30/03/2014 16:29

Gordy, "just because they produced a child"? That's your definition of a mother, is it? Think majority would disagree that is the definition of a parent, either gender.

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FanFuckingTastic · 30/03/2014 16:30

I feel blessed, even with my babies not here, because I have them and they are wonderful children and I DID THAT!!! Go me! It's a tough family day here too, not just because my children aren't here, but because my granny and my auntie are dead, so there are two holes where there should be mothers to celebrate. So I also spend this day thinking about how lucky I am, and how sad it is to miss these two fabulous ladies from our lives, and make sure their daughters and sons know I am thinking about them too.

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morethanpotatoprints · 30/03/2014 16:32

I totally agree OP and think it poor taste.
There are several threads on here today where a mum can't celebrate with a child through severe illness and bereavement.
Some people are so entitled and incapable of counting their blessings.
We are all ill here, taking it in turns to drag ourselves to the kitchen to prepare and cook tea.
Its only a flu virus we will get over, lots of folks won't get over their feelings of grief today.

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SilverOldie · 30/03/2014 16:36

So sad for your nieces Worra Sad.

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MorrisZapp · 30/03/2014 16:37

YABU. Two completely different issues, being sad about the people who are not here and feeling unappreciated by people who are.

I don't think it's remotely diva to want an acknowledgement on Mothers Day. You might as well shut down MN for existing when some people have suffered losses relating to motherhood.

Loneliness doesn't just affect those on their own. It affects people who feel ignored and taken for granted too.

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ilovemydoggy · 30/03/2014 16:37

Think some people just need to think before they post. The Facebook one was moaning so much that her dh must have got the hint as now she has posted. How lucky I am a new ted baker bag just for being a wonderful mummy.

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WorraLiberty · 30/03/2014 16:42

If you're in a lonely relationship feeling unappreciated, how is an empty token gesture on Mother's Day going to help?

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justasmallone · 30/03/2014 16:46

I do agree... However a bunch of flowers and a card isnt a lot to ask? And I don't think I'm being a princess, I was up at 3.15 due to the clocks changing and did a seven hour shift.

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InAGrump · 30/03/2014 16:50

I think you can be a diva on mumsnet but it's crass on Facebook as people might be struggling with fertility issues

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justasmallone · 30/03/2014 16:52

Agree Worra.

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KiwiBanana · 30/03/2014 16:53

It's silly how worked up some people get isn't it. I got a card and a chocolate bar from my 4 year old, he also made a flower pot thing at school for me. The best bit of my day though was him bursting in our room at 6am to sing me a song about Mother's Day, I was so chuffed that he'd remembered on his own that the time didn't matter!
I feel very blessed to have him :)

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MorrisZapp · 30/03/2014 16:58

I meant the feelings of being unappreciated come when your loved ones can't be arsed making a card, cooking for you or whatever it is you thought they might do.

Which makes you feel rubbish.

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GiveItALashJack · 30/03/2014 17:00

YANBU.

My DS is 8 and he is adamant that I needed something to mark the occasion, After thinking about it,I told him I wanted a day of cuddles. As much as possible. He hasnt left my side for most of the day,.

His dad did help him with a card and a token but I think that is more out of guilt that he didnt acknowledge my birthday recently (ltb!), but we have been having a tough time.

I am struggling for the last 3 years TTC baby no 2. I feel lucky no matter what happens, because I have my son. I cant even imagine what it must be like for people who want one or people like Worras nieces (Flowers btw, I am sorry)

You cant ask people not to celebrate a day or moan about the lack of celebration, that is their right, but a bit of sensitivity wouldnt go amiss.

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mrssmith79 · 30/03/2014 17:05

My dsd came over last night with a card, flowers and some lovely earrings. All from her own pocket and all totally unprompted. For a few minutes I felt like a'real mum' not some barren old hag who'll never have children of her own. Some people ought to count their blessings on days like this instead of getting hung up on materialistic crap and one upmanship.

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andsmile · 30/03/2014 17:05

We'll fact is I am a mum and I value my role as a parent and I think it reasonable for that to be shown on a day designated to Mothers.

If I want to complain about that I will, because that is my situation to work through not yours.

I have had fantastic support on here today, if I hadn't posted for fear of upsetting someone who has any emotional triggering child related where would that leave us.

I am fed up, you can't complain about anything because there is always someone more entitled to be upset than you are so you should just shut up say nowt.

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YellowDinosaur · 30/03/2014 17:06

I had 2 beautiful hand made cards from my smiling boys. That is more than enough for me.

However I do agree with Morriszapp that feeling unappreciated and taken for granted can be soul destroying in a different way to those who can't have children / have lost them or their mum. Not as bad clearly but it can Grind you down.

So yanbu about demanding princessy mums. But yabu about those who are unappreciated. Although in fairness they'll probably not be moaning on Facebook will they?

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andsmile · 30/03/2014 17:08

giveit you are where I was a few years back. I yearned for my second just as much as first.

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fuckoffbeaker · 30/03/2014 17:10

Its not just mothers day the divas appear though isit, we gomthru thensame thing on valentines, easter, christmas etc etc

makes me laugh and I secretly have a little flutter as to who will be the first to grump

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