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WIBU to buy my neighbour some high-waisted Simon Cowell trousers so I don't have to see his arse-crack on a Sunday afternoon..?

(23 Posts)
elahrairahforprimeminister Sun 30-Mar-14 14:07:48

He does a lot of bending/squatting whilst tinkering with his car.

I can't really afford a fence, besides it might get in his way.

Lovely bloke, I just don't want to see his man-bottom whilst eating my lunch or have to sit in the dark.


Any suggestions?


MillyStar Sun 30-Mar-14 14:09:47

Can you buy my dad some aswell please!

His arse crack is a common sight in this house, how do they not feel the breeze?

FrigginRexManningDay Sun 30-Mar-14 14:10:08

Buy a peashooter.
Hours of fun to be had grin

WorraLiberty Sun 30-Mar-14 14:13:44

He reminds me of my Dad's next door neighbour! grin

She just has her arse crack on permanent her leggings stop about a foot short from her hips.

Not a nice sight when you're having a BBQ and she chooses that moment to week out her boarders grin

EverythingsDozy Sun 30-Mar-14 14:13:47

They have braces in debenhams at the moment. I had to buy DD some boys ones because they don't do them for girls! She has a serious bum crack problem and she has no hips (being only 3yo) so a belt would be no good!

WorraLiberty Sun 30-Mar-14 14:14:14


ForalltheSaints Sun 30-Mar-14 14:15:07

Take a photo, print it out, and drop it through the letter box when he's not about.

elahrairahforprimeminister Sun 30-Mar-14 14:22:33

Take photos?

But he'll know it's meeee!


And he might think it's a come on. Or that I actually like his arse and lower his trousers further..!


SunnyL Sun 30-Mar-14 14:27:28

can you buy my SIL some too please? I swear I've seen her crack more than my DHs.

qazxc Sun 30-Mar-14 14:30:11

I'll be done with my over the bump maternity jeans in about 3 months, they reach half way up my back and i'm on the larger side, if that's of any use to you. grin

qazxc Sun 30-Mar-14 14:42:37

Yes, Do not take a photo and post it, it might encourage him more. He might end up wearing something like this

PPPpickUPaPenguin Sun 30-Mar-14 14:44:50

I think the photo is a good idea, attach a note. I do like you as a person, alas your crack puts me off my dinner, would you like me to treat you to some SC trousers for when you tinker with your car?

FairPhyllis Sun 30-Mar-14 14:46:18

Train your dog/cat/budgie to attack arse cracks on sight.

WorraLiberty Sun 30-Mar-14 14:55:15

Do you ride a bike?

You could thank him for the handy parking space...

qazxc Sun 30-Mar-14 15:45:23

Maybe you could throw him off the sent by putting a note with the photo saying "I know what you're doing and I like it you little tease. Love Neil XXXX"

MissDuke Sun 30-Mar-14 15:47:55

Ha ha @ the love letter from Neil!

OwlCapone Sun 30-Mar-14 15:49:16

You could try not looking. Unless he actually has it pressed up against your window.

Fakebook Sun 30-Mar-14 15:52:04

Could you buy him one of these? Post it through the letter box? grin

Aeroflotgirl Sun 30-Mar-14 15:55:20

Fakebook PMSL I need one too.

badbride Sun 30-Mar-14 16:12:32

YABU. The average household has approx £530 in small change lost in cracks and crevices around the home. Undertake a spot of bumcrack archaeology when your neighbour bends over to tend the begonias and you could be quids in grin

elahrairahforprimeminister Sun 30-Mar-14 16:28:06

YABU. The average household has approx £530 in small change lost in cracks and crevices around the home.


Does it really??

badbride Sun 30-Mar-14 16:30:29

Over the course of a year, apparently so, according to this survey

So depending on how brave you are/ how deep the bumcrack is, you could make it a regular fishing expedition...

KittensoftPuppydog Sun 30-Mar-14 16:32:37

My (male) gardener used to wear a g string. He was about 50, balding, with a long comb-over. Nice

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