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MIL really winds me up..

(18 Posts)
Suzyjane1 Sat 29-Mar-14 21:08:36

Nothing massively shocking at all. I just find her overbearing. Asked her if I could have her key (to my house) as I had lost mine. She responded "Yes, but if I could have it back please as it's handy to have..if I need to get in.." she doesn't need to get in as rarely looks after our dcs and she has really wound me up. It's like she's stepping on my toes. REGULARLY. This is just one silly example of how things occur. When she comes round she knocks and quickly knocks again and then lets herself in. Has even come upstairs when I've been drying my hair!!! Does anyone else find their mil ott?!
Other examples are her questioning whether kids are safe to.. Climb a tree, sleep on a bunkbed etc etc.. As if her judgment with kids is better than mine and my husbands..

Suzyjane1 Sat 29-Mar-14 21:10:28

I suspect a personality clash is going on too.. Sorry. Had to let off steam!

AgentZigzag Sat 29-Mar-14 21:10:35

Keep the key and brave any wrath/hand wringing/drama tantrums.

It's your house and your DC, don't let her overrule you.

TaliZorahVasNormandy Sat 29-Mar-14 21:12:18

Dont give the key back and just ignore her when shes around, she'll get the message eventually.

morethanpotatoprints Sat 29-Mar-14 21:14:44

I would never give my mil a key to our house and we get on fine.
She wouldn't ask for one neither.
Keeping one another at arms distance has been so good for our relationship and I love the woman, because I know what to expect from her. grin

Odaat Sat 29-Mar-14 21:16:01

Jeesus, I will not even her started on my mil. Overbearing doesnt touch it!

I think, like you, there was a personality clash too. My mil is plain nut though....(so she clashes with everyone)

Suzyjane1 Sat 29-Mar-14 21:16:02

Thanks. Absolutely not giving key back. EVER. Doesn't help that i am feeling hormonal atm! LOL

schnockles Sat 29-Mar-14 21:18:31

My MIL has a key to our flat. The only time she has ever used it I was in labour and she decorated the flat and filled our fridge and freezer as a surprise. That's how it's supposed to be. She'd never dream of bringing it with her when she was visiting as she'd know I was in...!

Sounds like you need a decent rant and to keep that key smile

Suzyjane1 Sat 29-Mar-14 21:27:04

Schnockles your mil sounds lovely!

Glad to hear I'm not alone in this. As the mother of 3 ds's, I will be v v aware of cutting those apron strings! Or are they famous last words?! ;)

junkfoodaddict Sat 29-Mar-14 21:30:02

Keep the key and give her a really old one that nobody knows what it opens. You'll know soon enough if she's letting herself into your house. You can always claim that you got a key cut from DH/DP and accidentally gave her the wrong key back. grin

FunkyBoldRibena Sat 29-Mar-14 21:30:58

You don't have to feel hormonal to be concerned at her ridiculous comments and intruding on your life.

Moomey Sat 29-Mar-14 21:40:14

I definately have a personality clash with mil.... so does DH!

She does nothing wrong, she's just overbaring and talks to much about random crap that I don't give a shit about, like going on about how her hairdresser had a baby. She thought I'd be interested as I'd just had a baby :/

I dread her coming to stay as it's soooo tiring listening to her!

deakymom Sat 29-Mar-14 23:03:42

im pretty sure everyone is having a personality clash with my mil at the moment she is fussing and mithering about everything because she bought us a holiday (which is great) hubby tried to talk to step dad about the route down which way is best etc we want to start off early go somewhere up the coast first then on to the campsite its quicker if we don't go on the motorway she wants us to go on the motorway because it is safer than the normal roads hmm they have lots of bends in them shock she went on and on and on till her husband told her to stop it! (he is usually patient with her) she is ringing to tell us about the holiday site (again) then reminding us we have to take bedding for the baby (again) then fretting about will dp drive fast down a twisty lane (he really wants to say yes but is sticking with no) she wants to check on our house while we are gone (hell no the last time she used £10 of gas on hot water cleaning a clean floor because it looked grey IT IS SUPPOSED TO BE GREY! she washed everything she could find over and over again her words to me where ive washed them twice but you might want to do them again)

im grateful for the holiday but i might be "breaking" our phones after texting we are there safe!

TestingTestingWonTooFree Sun 30-Mar-14 08:53:46

Deakymom, I can understand why your MIL is frustrating, but it sounds like she has a fairly high level of anxiety. It doesn't sound like anything she's done is malicious or intended to piss you off.

mrsjay Sun 30-Mar-14 10:37:28

why has she got a key in the first place dont give it back just casually let it go ,

ThePinkOcelot Sun 30-Mar-14 10:44:03

My a Mil has a key for our house, but only in case we lose one of ours, it's not actually for her to use.

My a mil used to annoy me until I read about other mils on here and now I think she's a saint.

HowContraryMary Sun 30-Mar-14 10:47:22

I find it odd. We all had keys to each others houses. I wouldn't expect my parents to knock any more than they would expect me to.

Out of curiosity - when you leave home do you give your key back to your parents?

wowfudge Sun 30-Mar-14 10:51:03

I'd be furious at my own mother (who has keys to our house and we have keys to hers) if she knocked then just let herself in instead of waiting for me to open the door. Some people have no manners or idea. They never think how they would feel if someone did the same to them.

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