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to want to choose the mothers' day present for the mil?

(14 Posts)
stripyleopard Sat 29-Mar-14 10:10:29

So my dh is usually an excellent present buyer, all my presents are carefully considered and he's very generous. But when it comes to his mum he seems to have a bit of a blind spot and always buys the same perfume/bracelet/flowers thing. This wouldn't be such a problem except I buy all the other family presents and her partner told me that mil feels we put more effort into other people's presents - mil would never mention this directly of course and is always grateful for her gifts. The problem is that dh sees her as a mummy not a person iuswim, and doesn't think she's changed since he was a child. I make suggestions but they are normally rejected because he 'knows what she likes'. I don't want to upset him but feel a bit sorry for her!

ilovepowerhoop Sat 29-Mar-14 10:12:33

I dont get involved with what dh gets for his mum and he doesnt get involved with what I get for mine.

givemeaclue Sat 29-Mar-14 10:13:18

Leave him to it.

defineme Sat 29-Mar-14 10:13:29

This is hard, but you have to respect it's his mum.
Dh bought mil a pair of hideous(in my opinion) £2.99 slippers for xmas and he was so proud of his choice-I said nothing, although I did mention how dh had chosen them. Mil wears them with pride.

FunkyBoldRibena Sat 29-Mar-14 10:14:31

I would tell his mother's partner that if he wants to tell her son that he needs to put more effort in then go ahead as he chooses all of his mum's presents and will be devastated knowing that she has said this.

fuzzywuzzy Sat 29-Mar-14 10:20:01

Do not get involved, tell MIL partner your DH chooses his mums gifts himself.

BillyBanter Sat 29-Mar-14 10:22:15

Did you tell her dp that it its because you choose all the other presents but your DH insists on buying this one and is happy that his choices are best? And, therefore her dp needs to address him if he wants the situation to change as your suggestions fall on deaf ears.

Laquila Sat 29-Mar-14 10:22:41

Could you not both choose her a smaller present each?

usualsuspectt Sat 29-Mar-14 10:23:04

Mothers day gifts are flowers and chocolates.

No need to buy lavish presents.

Leave him to it.

tobiasfunke Sat 29-Mar-14 10:24:46

If you like her get her a small Happy MIL's Day gift to go with whatever tat your DH has bought her.
I symapthise my DH buys terrible presents- they always have to be practical.

Laquila Sat 29-Mar-14 10:24:56

I suggested that my husband get my MIL a necklace for her birthday a few years ago - he said, "no, she's already got a necklace"...I pointed out that that wasn't the point of necklaces, or indeed of presents, and he was genuinely baffled.

Nocomet Sat 29-Mar-14 10:26:10

DH loved his mum deeply and still really misses her, 14 years after she died. Buying Mothers' day cards was still my job.

All cards and presents are my job, I need to sort something for DSIL today.

I can't imagine having a DH who wouldn't be delighted to delegate Mothers' day gift choosing.

PunkrockerGirl Sat 29-Mar-14 17:29:13

Laquila, that made me laugh grin

stripyleopard Sat 29-Mar-14 19:18:01

Thank you for your sage advice. I will leave him to it smile

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