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Dh and dc's

(14 Posts)
Anydrinkwilldo Wed 26-Mar-14 22:21:45

Opinions please
Had a few 'words' with dh this evening. Dinner was ready, he fed ds1 and I had my dinner (while holding a grumpy ds2) Then for his dinner he sat in the kitchen by himself while I was watching the two. This happens every evening. I may have slightly exploded at him and told him I felt very hard done by coz he gets to eat breakfast & lunch with no one pulling out of him while mine is a few bites while running around after ds1, or eating one handed to feed ds2 etc. And then I have to be 'on duty' again during my dinner but because he's eating after us he thinks it's ok to sit by himself reading the news on his phone while eating his dinner. He can't see where I'm coming from because going to work isn't exactly a rest (his words). But I'm trying to explain that he's getting time to eat/pee etc without two kids. Am I being unreasonable?

Sirzy Wed 26-Mar-14 22:25:13

How old are the children? Sounds like the are pretty young so for now until they are old enough to feed themselves why not feed them first and then you and dh when they are in bed?

curiousgeorgie Wed 26-Mar-14 22:27:12

I second what Sirzy has said. Definitely eat after they go to bed.

Anydrinkwilldo Wed 26-Mar-14 22:30:03

Ds1 is 2 and goes to bed at 8/8.30, ds2 is 2 months

MamaPain Wed 26-Mar-14 22:31:20

Eat separately from them as pp has said or can you not whack them in a high chair/rocker/playpen in front of the telly for 15 minutes?

What do you on normally do to mange them when you need time alone to pee/shower/ sex etc

BratinghamPalace Wed 26-Mar-14 22:31:30

YADNBU but nor is he. Having them physically all over you all the time is utterly exhausting but he does not know that as it does not happen to him.

Ledkr Wed 26-Mar-14 22:34:02

We always eat when our youngest is in bed.
It's our chill time and we chat and have a glass of wine.
We ate together today as I had something to do but it resembled a chimps tea party and I won't be doing it again in a hurry!

littlebluedog12 Wed 26-Mar-14 22:39:40

Why does be need to feed DS1? Could you move towards all eating together round the table at the same time?

We have the same age gap, it's tough when they are small. However DH was never home on time for dinner so I always had to juggle both kids while eating my dinner. And he got to eat his in front of the telly after they were in bed!

If the baby is old enough, stick him in the high chair with some toys while you eat, and encourage DS1 to start feeding himself more.

Anydrinkwilldo Wed 26-Mar-14 22:42:18

Mama sex, what is that-it sounds familiar.....
If I go to the toilet ds1 is usually watching in with me, ds2 in the swing. Ds1 won't sit, he doesn't even sit down to eat his own dinner! We could wait till bedtime is over but that is nearly 9 which is a bit late for me.

Anydrinkwilldo Wed 26-Mar-14 22:43:51

Ds1 is great at feeding himself, but he could take an hour/gets distracted/has a tantrum. For breakfast & lunch I leave him to his own devices, dinner is the only one he's fed

MamaPain Wed 26-Mar-14 22:50:57

Why on earth is he in the toilet with you? Start setting some boundaries.

It is unfair that your DH gets. All this alone time but I really think you need to take control and put your DS1 in a high chair or a play pen and eat your tea without being harangued.

StarGazeyPond Wed 26-Mar-14 22:58:48

DS1 needs to sit down for his meals - he'll soon learn than if he doesn't sit still then he gets his meals taken away (tantrum or not!).

MamaPain Wed 26-Mar-14 23:01:02

Completely agree with Star, he needs to eat at the table, nicely. That mean setting a time limit and following through regardless of tantrums.

Get back some control and then maybe you won't have so much hassle.

morethanpotatoprints Wed 26-Mar-14 23:11:53

Maybe get ds1 in bed sooner? 7pm?
Both of you eat together after this.
Ask him to help at meal times?
Tell him what you want?

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