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To want to scream at my husband sometimes???

(31 Posts)
redhead78 Wed 26-Mar-14 20:15:41

We're going away with my mil this weekend which has been arranged for months. Since booking it I have been diagnosed with gestational diabetes which has totally affected daily life for me and made my emotions even more haywire.
My mil thinks all I have to do is "not eat cakes and chocolate", despite having explained to her that it's much more complex than that and that I can basically have hardly any carbs, no white flour based things at all and no cereal etc as well as severely limiting chocolate and other sweet stuff.
My hubby has been as supportive as he can be but he has no idea really the planning that goes behind a weekly menu/shopping/preparing meals etc, let alone the havoc the gd has further created in this regard. He goes off to work every day and sees me eat one meal (dinner with him, which I haven't had to change much, just add more veg instead of pasta/rice/potatoes etc) and do one blood sugar reading. Then for the rest of the day I'm constantly trying to think of new things we can have instead of sticking to the same meals all the time, taking 3 other blood sugar readings and basically food has become the centre of everything for me. If I've just eaten then I'm thinking of my next test readings. If I've just done a test I'm thinking about the next meal to prepare.
I don't think I've been unreasonable in that I still give hubby sandwiches/crisps/chocolate bars in his pack up every day and he still has the cereal based breakfast that he likes (he cycles to work so needs the calories!).
BUT they're now on the phone to each other planning what to take for this weekend and I'm having to listen to them planning what treats they can take but that I "won't mind" because I don't like them anyway. Example, they're taking cinnamon raisin bagels, rather than plain ones because I only like the plain ones. And they're only taking chocolate with fruit and nuts in as I only like plain chocolate.
They seem to think that this will make it easier for me to sit and watch them eating these things as treats whilst I basically sit there eating either nothing or carrot sticks.
Part of me feels like I'm being totally unreasonable expecting them not to eat these things in front of me but part of me wants to scream at them for being so selfish! Neither of them seem to have any idea what a struggle I'm going through every single day for the rest of my pregnancy but at the same time I don't want to be accused of being selfish and stopping them enjoying themselves.
I don't begrudge eating the way I have to currently for the sake of my baby, but is it too much to ask that the few times I do eat meals with other people (and I'm only talking very close family members) that they show some support and eat what I can?

TheseAreTheJokesFolks Wed 26-Mar-14 23:33:56

Wholemeal pasta
Tsatsiki with tikka.

WilsonFrickett Wed 26-Mar-14 23:35:17

You won't be pg for ever, so here's what I would do.

Make a meal plan for 7 days of things you like.

Eat it on a weekly basis for the rest of your pg.

Stop letting 'what will we eat tonight' become a big issue that controls your entire day, you won't suffer if you eat a restricted, yet controlled diet, for the next few months.

For the weekend away, make sure you pack some treats that you want. Ask DH and mil not to have big chats about their treats in front of you, and left them bring what they want - again with the proviso they don't have a big long discussion about what they're eating.

Just let it go a little bit. You are making your diet into this huge thing and I understand why you are doing it, but it needn't be your main focus for th next however many weeks. Just get it sorted and file it under 'humdrum' then look forward to your baby. And your weekend away.

TheseAreTheJokesFolks Wed 26-Mar-14 23:40:49

Berries in moderation

Plain chocolate square if I had pangs....kept me going btw

Lots of recipes online if you like baking

Carrot sticks great with hummus for snacking...eating little and often and lots of snacks helps prevent big fluctuations but you are still pregnant so cannot and should not starve yourself xxx

deakymom Thu 27-Mar-14 06:35:50

totally understand the frustration here i have a food intolerance for ten years i still hate people eating cakes in front of me YES i know i can get gluten free ones but they are a,three times the price (at least) b,nothing as tasty c,hard to find

then i go to peoples houses and its all would you like a biscuit? (its been 6 years ffs you should KNOW by now?) cake anyone? (i cant eat gluten) but its mr kipling!? (try telling people it really doesn't make a difference on the brand they are just confused)

they will see on your weekend away how hard it is for you just remember to breathe deep xx

RedFocus Thu 27-Mar-14 07:19:08

I chose to do low carbing and it's easy! It's not their fault that you can't have carbs and after the baby has been born you'll be back to normal soon enough. Stop moaning!

Onsera3 Thu 27-Mar-14 07:20:26

Yeah I guess I think YABU as I wouldn't have eaten those foods anyway during pregnancy. Eg white flour? No nutritional benefit whatsoever so would be in a little treat (like cake) once a week maybe.

I never had any GD symptoms but there were plenty of times I had to be around friends and family eating stuff I couldn't really. I didn't want to fill up on treats as they had little nutritional benefit.

Similarly, I wouldn't have expected people to stop drinking alcohol around me or not eat pate or soft cheese etc
even though I like these things.

It sounds like there was a lot of refined stuff and simple carbs that should have been cut from your diet anyway so maybe instead of looking at is as you missing out you should think of it as a chance for you and your baby to get better nutrition.

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