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AIBU to think Stephen Lawrence should be allowed to RIP

(87 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

vexedfoxy Wed 26-Mar-14 06:04:29

Most people on here are parents (as am I) and the thought of the loss of a child whatever age is horrific. However does there come a time as in the Lawrence case when everyone should allow the victim to rest in peace. I am not using the AWFUL term 'closure' or 'moving on' but just allow death in peace and be with your memories of the loved one however it happened. Those involved everyday have to be with their thoughts and consequences for the rest of their own lives.

ihatethecold Wed 26-Mar-14 06:11:33

His mother will never let that happen.
She is now in the House of Lords. She will make sure nobody forgets.

I'm not sure I would either considering the guilty got off!

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Wed 26-Mar-14 06:21:55


She is his mother and can act as she pleases.

vexedfoxy Wed 26-Mar-14 06:22:10

The ones convicted are in prison. Should every person who is killed have their relatives in the House of Lords? Be a bit crowded with all the service peoples families?

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Wed 26-Mar-14 06:24:22

The families of anyone killed are also free to make a political career should they wish to.

saintmerryweather Wed 26-Mar-14 06:27:25

The dead are always in peace, its the people who are left behind who are in torment. You sound like youre saying they should get over it

Backonthefence Wed 26-Mar-14 06:33:34

He is dead he no longer cares it is his family that is left behind and this is how they find peace YABU.

HavantGuard Wed 26-Mar-14 06:34:07

I'm sure his family will be grateful to you for telling them how they should be behaving.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Wed 26-Mar-14 06:48:17

He is in peace.

His family are not which is hardly surprising.

MaryWestmacott Wed 26-Mar-14 06:52:48

You don't mean "Stephen Lawrence should be left in peace", you mean "Stephen Lawrence's mum should stop talking about it".

BeckAndCall Wed 26-Mar-14 06:54:00

His family have been working hard not only to ensure that those guilty are made to face justice but also to ensure that the investigation process is made more fair for future victims and those who obstructed the case are called to account. And that even where that obstruction is seen in a big trusted institution it is not tolerated and we don't just accept assurances at face value because of a blind faith in that process.

So, YABU. If his parents feel there is still work to be done then I admire them for doing it.

sashh Wed 26-Mar-14 06:54:17

I think he is at peace.


His parents took his body to be buried in Jamaica and the location is secret so the grave is not vandalised.

There is a memorial plaque where he died that is often vandalised.

The police did a crap job, they blamed Stephen, spied on his family, one of the investigators was/is a friend of the father of one of the killers.

Only 2 of the four killers have been convicted.

His mother has acted with dignity at every step of this nightmare. She is the reason we know a lot about how badly the met can and do behave.

Stephen should not be forgotten and his memory should not be allowed to fade until at least the police have been held to account and the 'bad apples' removed.

I would though, ask the BBC, to stop calling him, "the murdered black teenager, Stephen Lawrence".

I never met him, I have never knowingly met his family or friends. What I do know is that he was a young man studying for A Levels. He had friends and family who loved him.

He did not die because of the colour of his skin, he died because some thugs thought the colour of his skin mattered and attacked him.

Thymeout Wed 26-Mar-14 06:57:14

This was a lot more than a tragic death. It was a racially motivated murder that corrupt police officers tried to cover up and prevent those responsible from being brought to justice.

Doreen Lawrence's campaign led to a massive investigation into institutional racism in the Metropolitan Police to the benefit of the entire community.

It is beyond insulting to imply that she did this to further a political career.

Oscarandelliesmum Wed 26-Mar-14 06:58:46

Well put Sassh. yabu

scarlettsmummy2 Wed 26-Mar-14 06:59:47

Totally agree with thymeout . It goes way beyond a murder.

meditrina Wed 26-Mar-14 07:00:42

I would never tell a mourning family when they should "move on".

Nor a grieving community (remember that comedian who said Liverpool should, just weeks before the Hillborough admissions? Got some support, but he ended up apologising unreservedly)

I think it is especially tactless when investigations into police actions are still running.

TidyDancer Wed 26-Mar-14 07:01:18

OP, are you referring more to the M&S campaign? I wonder if that aspect is bothering you? I overheard a conversation at work yesterday and that made a few people uncomfortable (although afaik they couldn't articulate why).

roadwalker Wed 26-Mar-14 07:01:53

Stephen, if he is anywhere, is untouched now by anything going on in this world
Why should anyone but his family get to decide how they manage and what they do
I find his parents inspirational
How they coped with such dignity after the loss of their son and the terrible way they were treated is incredible

JeanSeberg Wed 26-Mar-14 07:06:28

What was the m&s campaign about tidy?

SanityClause Wed 26-Mar-14 07:06:32

She's not in the House of Lords for having a dead son, but for her work in exposing institutional racism.

The Lawrence family did not choose for him to be murdered, and for them to be thrown into the public eye.

As you say, they have to be with their thoughts and the consequences of his death for the rest of their lives.

MrsMcColl Wed 26-Mar-14 07:07:02

YABU. I am genuinely shocked that anyone would think this. The Lawrence family have done an extraordinary job - no doubt at huge cost to themselves - of bringing to light appalling corruption in the police service that is supposed to keep us all safe. Personally I am grateful to them for that. Frankly, how dare you suggest that Stephen's mother shouldn't keep speaking out until the truth is fully known and action is taken to make sure a police 'investigation' like this never happens again.

WottaTheOdds Wed 26-Mar-14 07:08:05

Agree with all the others who say that Stephen IS in peace. And I would imagine that the only way his mother can begin to make sense of it is and to fine peace of sorts, to do what she has done to try and ensure that it cannot happen again.

You are being beyond unreasonable. The most charitable take I have on what you have said is that you are naïve, but this

Should every person who is killed have their relatives in the House of Lords? Be a bit crowded with all the service peoples families?

is just plain nasty or worse.

FrancesNiadova Wed 26-Mar-14 07:11:25

Stephen Lawrence was a fine young man, working hard studying for his A levels. He was brutally murdered by a gang of thugs who got away with it.

Stephen should never be forgotten; his mother is right to keep her bright son's memory & the injustice of his murder in our minds.

If Stephen's Mum now wants to further her campaign & follow a political career, then fine. I can think of several politicians who have gone into politics with less laudable motives.

As to his plaque being vandalised, well this is just despicable. A camera should be put up & those doing it should be charged with criminal damage.

Generally, I am proud of our country & all it stands for, but we let Stephen down, shamefully.

LottieJenkins Wed 26-Mar-14 07:12:38

YABVU............ If it was my child I wouldn't rest till all the people who were involved in my son's death were behind bars!!

WeAreDetective Wed 26-Mar-14 07:12:47

I could not disagree with you more, op!!

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