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To tell Dh it is not ok to leave 10yr old ds and 6 yr old dd alone in the house?

(260 Posts)
StartRight Tue 25-Mar-14 21:56:14

Dh is making me feel that I'm making a mountain out of a molehill but I came back from work today (later than usual as had a meeting) to find Dh in the car on the drive about to take ds2 to beavers.

He was going to leave ds1 and dd1 in the house while he dropped ds2 off! They are only 10 and 6.

Dh says they were both settled watching tv and he would only have been gone for 5mins.

However I am appalled and feel shocked that he has considered doing this. I'm really upset and feel cross but can't be cross as Dh is making out that I'm over reacting.

Am I?

EatShitDerek Tue 25-Mar-14 21:57:40

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Greythorne Tue 25-Mar-14 21:57:49

I think it's FI e

Greythorne Tue 25-Mar-14 21:58:03


CrohnicallyChanging Tue 25-Mar-14 21:59:18

I wouldn't be happy with the 6 year old staying, even with the 10 year old as children can get very silly when left together. I'd leave the 10 year old alone though.

5madthings Tue 25-Mar-14 21:59:49

It depends on the child but many kids would be fine with being left for a bit at this age. Certainly the 10yr old should be capable of being left.

A lot depends on sibling dynamics Ie do they fight?

enriquetheringbearinglizard Tue 25-Mar-14 22:00:29

I never did. Not because of a fear of actual danger, but because of the fact that they were MY responsibility and also because I didn't think it right to put duty of care onto a 10, or whatever the elder year old.

3littlefrogs Tue 25-Mar-14 22:01:32

I would have left the 10 year old, but not the 6 year old.
Not fair to expect a ten year old to be responsible for a 6 year old and i would worry about an argument or sillyness.

Cluffyflump Tue 25-Mar-14 22:02:20

I would leave my DS (12) alone for a bit, and I have since he was 10.
I would not leave my 6 year old with him though.

BurdenedWithGloriousPurpose Tue 25-Mar-14 22:02:45

I leave my 9 year old but not with my 6 year old as they'd beat each other.

But if yours aren't evil like mine like that then it's fine for 5/10 minutes.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo Tue 25-Mar-14 22:03:01

Leaving a 10 year old is fine. I don't think I'd leave him in charge of a 6 year old though (although 5 mins isn't long...)

pixiepotter Tue 25-Mar-14 22:03:32


MirabileDictu Tue 25-Mar-14 22:03:47

Not in the slightest bit fine. Agree with all who say the 10yo shouldn't be made responsible for younger sibling.

StartRight Tue 25-Mar-14 22:04:19

Maybe I am overreacting then! 10 yr old ds is very sensible and I wouldn't worry about him. They don't argue really as they are both closer in age to ds2.

I feel uncomfortable about my 6 yr old dd as she is very young and it's not a 10 yr olds responsibility to look after her!

shallweshop Tue 25-Mar-14 22:05:30

Agree that it's fine for the 10 year old but I wouldn't have left the 6 year old too.

EatShitDerek Tue 25-Mar-14 22:05:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Slapperati Tue 25-Mar-14 22:06:06

For five mins I'd leave a sensible 10 yo and 6 yo in front of the TV. What is your DH like normally?

StartRight Tue 25-Mar-14 22:06:59

Cross post! Maybe not the crime of the century from Dh then but certainly it is valid for me to have concerns.

I've told him I never want him to do it again

hippo123 Tue 25-Mar-14 22:07:06

Yabu, like your dh says they were probably so engrossed in what they were doing they would have hardly noticed. I also think it's good to give an older one a bit of responsibility.

Minorchristmascrisis Tue 25-Mar-14 22:07:10

I posted an almost identical thread earlier today but my two are 12 and 8. Most people thought it was fine. I wouldn't be happy with a 6 year old though.

BillyBanter Tue 25-Mar-14 22:07:11

Its a judgement call and you and DH see things differently. I don't think is worth getting to het up about.

usualsuspectt Tue 25-Mar-14 22:08:50

For five minutes, I'd say it was ok.

AwfulMaureen Tue 25-Mar-14 22:08:56

I do it. Sue me. Mine are the same age and I leave them for ten mins at a time....rarely but sometimes. I have a mobile and so does DD1. She and DD2 know the rules and the front door is locked...they can get out the back and stay in the sitting room watching tv. It's a matter of how mature the DC are in my opinion. I am confident that mine would be fine if "something" happened.

BrianTheMole Tue 25-Mar-14 22:09:05

Depends on the children really and how sensible they really are. Is it really 5 mins tops?

notnowbernard Tue 25-Mar-14 22:09:47

Mine are 10 and 7 I'd leave in the scenario OP describes

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