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Wedding anniversary party and present

(76 Posts)
HarlotOTara Tue 25-Mar-14 21:16:34

Dh and I have been invited to a 10th wedding anniversary party. I was thinking of giving a card and a tin of beans - as a joke as 10th is tin I think. Dh brought home the invite which has a poem asking for money instead of presents so they can go away for the weekend.

Aibu to think this is a cheek and rather crass?

They've asked for presents? shock

Cheeky buggers. Wedding requests don't bother me at all but this is stupid. It would actually put me off going at all.

Musicaltheatremum Tue 25-Mar-14 21:20:06

What a cheek! What are people coming to? I like your idea.
Bring a bottle or a dish is one thing but money is outrageous. My husband and I had 50th parties over the last 2 and a half years and for his people brought small things and booze and for mine I said no present but charity donations if wanted. Several people brought me small things and lots of booze.

TwixTime Tue 25-Mar-14 21:28:11

Is it just me or are friends getting more expensive to gave these days?!

HarlotOTara Tue 25-Mar-14 21:35:19

My dh doesn't want go now. I have no intention of giving money.

Here is the poem:

Our married life has already begun,
Ten years of adventures already done
We do have everything under the sun (don't need more then! )
So we both thought we would make a suggestion
To save you from all the searching and guessing
We would love a weekend away for some fun

A small sum popped in a card,
And placed into our Moneybox,
Any amount would be appreciated
Now that we have saved you all the fuss
We can't wait for you to celebrate with us!

Bloody awful poem - that alone would stop me doing as they want. They seem a nice couple although I don't know them very well - dh knows the bloke

GiveTwoSheets Tue 25-Mar-14 21:37:34

Seriously people do this kind of bollocks? I'm embarrassed just reading the poem

ENormaSnob Tue 25-Mar-14 21:40:08

That is ridiculously cheeky.

lessonsintightropes Tue 25-Mar-14 21:41:43

I'm not cheap when it comes to wedding presents and don't mind a cash contribution (poems make me boak though) such as a contribution towards the honeymoon.

But... I don't even send anyone an anniversary card, let alone buy them a gift. None of my older siblings celebrate theirs any other way than privately, and even my parents just gave each other a card and went for a meal rather than inviting/involving us in it, so it just seems strange to invite other people to give you a gift. I totally get parties - but if I ever hosted one it would be catered with drink/BYOB with absolutely no presents expected and would TBH flabbergasted to receive one.

Celticlassie Tue 25-Mar-14 21:42:57

Why the hell do people seem to believe that asking for money in poetry is less greedy? wink

pluCaChange Tue 25-Mar-14 21:43:35

Yuck. I can understand a "pome" on an occasion like a wedding, when gifts are traditional, but it's sheer, disingenuous cheek to pretend people have to give you a present for your anniversary, and that you're graciously letting them off!

WaitMonkey Tue 25-Mar-14 21:44:22

Am beyond shocked that people. think this is acceptable. shock

HarlotOTara Tue 25-Mar-14 21:47:21

There is food and a bar on the invite but even so, maybe an envelope with a poem saying 'fuck off'. Actually I have a coaster saying that which I bought on Saturday - maybe I should give them that, it has a dog on it

fluffyraggies Tue 25-Mar-14 21:47:57

Nooooooooo -

People are asking for money at anniversaries now?

<face palm>

where are peoples manners?

MarthasHarbour Tue 25-Mar-14 21:48:11

That poem is basically crap! Hardly any of it rhymes and it isnt even a limerick.

My literary critique aside wink yes they are being bloody cheeky, DH and i even get cringey when my sisters send us anniversary cards (which is delightful of them yes but we acknowledge our anniversary privately).

I would go to the party bringing your tin of beans! grin

StrawberryCheese Tue 25-Mar-14 21:50:18

That's really cheeky. I mean, a ten year anniversary isn't even a special thing is it? I didn't know people had anniversary parties unless it's a silver or golden anniversary. I like your tin of baked beans idea!

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks Tue 25-Mar-14 21:50:25

Stick two pennies in the card. One from each of you. Put a poem in with them along the lines of lucky pennies, or 2 pennies to rub together....
The poem is so grabby!

MyNameIsKenAdams Tue 25-Mar-14 21:51:47

Well done to you both for making it to ten years
But sadly your invite has confirmed my fears
In days gone by
Dont ask me why
Anniversaries were marked with just cheers

These days, it seems that cash is king
And your poem has cemented such a thing
We wont pay
To send you on your way
Just be happy you're still wearing the ring

CarryOnDancing Tue 25-Mar-14 21:52:19

Send the beans and write:

"Your invitation poem planted a seed and made me think your party is motivated by greed.
Giving my hard earned money just seems like a sin so instead please enjoy our congratulations in the form of this tin." grin

MyNameIsKenAdams Tue 25-Mar-14 21:53:04

Oh Carrys is much better!!

WooWooOwl Tue 25-Mar-14 21:54:03

That's disgusting!

It's bad enough for weddings but for an anniversary!?

That's just vile!

But if you fancy the piss up on them with your mutual friends, then go along and just take a card. I would never normally think it's ok to turn up to an event like that empty handed, but rudeness is clearly acceptable to these people, so the tone has been set.

But the baked beans idea was crap too tbh.

Bunbaker Tue 25-Mar-14 21:55:27

This is beyond crass. I bet they get a few people not going. Why do they think it is OK to send out a rude, grabby invitation?

TwixTime Tue 25-Mar-14 21:58:17

kenadams thanks for making my night grin

Roseformeplease Tue 25-Mar-14 22:02:09

Here's a tin that's full of beans
We hope will give you both the means
To climb like Jack
And both bring back
A fucking huge golden goose

(Ps - your poem was crap too)

My thoughts.....

MyNameIsKenAdams Tue 25-Mar-14 22:04:18

Or just write in the card

"If you wanted a weekend away, why not just do that instead of spending money on a party?"

Hissy Tue 25-Mar-14 22:10:18


Good thinking! smile

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