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To be totally effed off my one of my neighbours

(10 Posts)
GeoffLeopard Thu 20-Mar-14 11:59:09

She moved here about 18 months ago. A friend of mine said she'd met someone who was new to the area & looking to meet other mum friends with kids (both hv 2 kids under 5)so she put us in touch. I invited her round and we hit it off, lots in common. She even pointed these things out to me.

We were friendly for a while, she invited me to hers and her to mine and I had a few get togethers with other neighbours that I included her in. Our children play nicely together.

For some reason tho no idea why, she 'changed' around the time she witnessed my next door neighbour being burgled last summer and rang the police. When she was asked to be a witness she refused (her dad had had a bad experience or something). Ever since she told me this she's been odd with me though I barely made a comment on her decision so can't think why. Last autumn we were supposed to catch up but I had to cancel as my DD had a meningitis scare. When I explained her reply was odd "oh well whatever I can rest at home" no ref to my DD. Her amd her family came to our open house Xmas drinks in december & she was fine though I got the distinct impression she was trying to play up how close she is to some of our other neighbours. "You must come round for dinner!" But a large whiff of sycophant in it. Now barely a hello since.

Admittedly she has a 3 month old baby but she started being offhand with me long before that. Maybe she's just 'not that into me' lol which is fair enough but she's just plain rude now. Ignores me if we pass in the street or will just talk to my DDs. It's just weird.

AIBU to feel aggrieved as I went out of my way to welcome this person to the neighbourhood?

Quoteunquote Thu 20-Mar-14 12:39:40

Not coming forward as a witness really tells you a lot about a person,

all the rest well that's just odds and ends, probable noticed by you because of a heightened sense of awareness because of the cowardly non witness action.

Who wants a friend who chooses not to do the right thing, hardly someone you want around.

cozietoesie Thu 20-Mar-14 12:53:11

Do you know if she's received any harassment since she told the police?

GeoffLeopard Thu 20-Mar-14 13:09:49

Well Quote ur right. It pissed me right off... I've always been taught you have to be prepared to stick your neck out for what you believe in. My mum famously and publicly sacked our window cleaner in front of customers (we had a chip shop) because he refused to be a witness to a burglary.
Cozietosie I doubt she's had harassment since though I don't know. She didn't tell many people and kept her nose out after the fact.

Since I posted I remembered us having a conversation about grass last summer. We both had our gardens done and they had AstroTurf and we had grass. I had never heard of AstroTurf in a back garden and wonder if she thought I was being snobby? I get the impression the details are important to her.

LadyCybilCrawley Thu 20-Mar-14 13:15:44

Any chance she knew who
the buglers were and is either feeling awkward around you or fears being found out for protecting them?

GeoffLeopard Thu 20-Mar-14 13:16:53

No I doubt it LadyCybil, they were a traveller gang.

ArtexMonkey Thu 20-Mar-14 13:22:11

What was the 'bad experience' her dad had? When was it? It's a bit unfair for people to judge her as cowardly if he got kneecapped or something.

The rest of it sounds like it could be deliberate rudeness, or simply that she's a bit socially inept, and you sound like you could maybe possibly be overthinking things slightly. Also, can i just say, this is totally irrelevant, but i love your name?

GeoffLeopard Thu 20-Mar-14 13:30:15

Artex she said he'd felt pressurised from the police I think, no physical attacks or anything. Yes I'm a serial overthinker so no doubt I am. And she's obviously v busy at mo so not concerned about neighbours feelings (fair enough). I know, my name's hilarious right? I'm a catch ha ha! Seriously, any name that sounds like a band is ace in my book and may I congratulate you on your name!

GeoffLeopard Thu 20-Mar-14 17:46:08

Bump

whiteblossom Thu 20-Mar-14 19:20:19

Why don't you just ask her?

Would you even want to be friends again after the way she has treated you?

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