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AIBU?

About getting DC to school

103 replies

Gerrygiraffe · 20/03/2014 09:51

We moved house last year and as a result we are almost two miles from school. There is a school closer to home but it is AWFUL so we decided to keep DS1 in his school.

I don't drive so we walk everyday. DD started in pre school this year. Both DC seem to pick up every bug going.

A few times recently, when DS has been ill I haven't bothered taking DD to pre school as it is a long way for DS to walk if he is poorly. It is a bit easier to take DS when DD is ill as she can go in the pram.

I also admit that if they are under the weather due to the walk I have a few times reported them as sick whereas if we lived next door they would probably have made it to school.

DH says I should try and get the DC to school wherever possible but AIBU to think we are OK to do what I do? They don't miss much school and are doing really well.

If we moved them to the local school their education would be shocking and they love their current school.

What do others do with a long walk?

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FrigginRexManningDay · 20/03/2014 09:56

Could you get a buggy board?

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Seeline · 20/03/2014 09:59

Is there not a bus to get you a bit closer rather than walk all the way?
I think it is a bad habit to get into - the children will think that they don't have to go to school for very minor things, which will get hard to sort out when at senior school etc.

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mymiraclebubba · 20/03/2014 10:08

Sorry but I think Yabvu!! You made the decision to keep them at a school that far away when you don't drive someone should be making every effort to get them there. Can you not get a bus/taxi?

Being ill and keeping them off is one thing, being tired and grumpy at the thought of a long walk is completely irresponsible imo (sorry) esp as you day if you lived next door you would send them

Either move them to the closer school or find better ways of getting them to school

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GertBySea · 20/03/2014 10:14

I think you need to make a better plan. I don't really think it's ok to keep them off now, but as they get older it will definitely start to matter more. You'll need to have arrangements in place for that time. Is there anyone living out of area like you, who could help with lift in exchange for you walking their kids home on nicer days?

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Seeline · 20/03/2014 10:14

Also what happens when DD starts school too - you can't keep one off school just because the other one is poorly.

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SapphireMoon · 20/03/2014 10:15

Bet the school near you not that bad. What is wrong with it?
However, if you choose to go to school a couple of miles away buggy board maybe an option.

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JockTamsonsBairns · 20/03/2014 10:16

You must have noticed that school attendance has come under close scrutiny lately? It's really not on to adopt such a lax approach to attendance - as another pp said, it stores up problems for the future if going to school seems to be optional.

How about a bike with a trailer? I live rurally, and have seen quite a few parents biking it to school, especially those who are just a bit far to walk but don't have cars. We don't have public transport servicing the school, so it's a sensible option.

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WorraLiberty · 20/03/2014 10:17

I agree with your DH

You're running the risk of your kids feeling left out and awkward with so much time off school. It can be hard to catch up socially as well as academically.

I appreciate it's a difficult situation for you, but it's one you have chosen.

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SapphireMoon · 20/03/2014 10:19

Also those bikes with a bucket type/ wheel barrow bit at the front.
Saw someone with a three wheeler with a seat at the back. two children on it, strapped in with their safety helmets waving at everyone.

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Gerrygiraffe · 20/03/2014 10:23

I am SAHM (another 10 month old as well but they are portable ha ha) and we can't afford driving lessons or another car. No direct bus route and to go indirectly would be a complicated journey.

No one local goes to the school. It has a small catchment but we are OK due to sibling rule for DD and baby.

They aren't off lots by any means, it is just that eg if they have been up a bit in the night and still not great the walk would probably be too much along with a day at school.

I know it will get harder as they get older but I am hoping they will be more resiliant!

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BabyDubsEverywhere · 20/03/2014 10:24

Surely you could have got a taxi for the odd time one was really too ill to walk? or a bus, or a buggy board? or you should have really considered this before moving away from the school? or you should move to the closer school? Tbh our school is only satisfactory in the league tables, we were convinced to look around by friends and totally bowled over by how great the school is.. look beyond the tables!

You really cant be keeping both off because one is under the weather and its cold out!!! How ridiculous!

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Gerrygiraffe · 20/03/2014 10:26

We do walk in all weathers and fully kitted out with waterproofs etc. It is not the cold it is that the DC don't seem well.

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BabyDubsEverywhere · 20/03/2014 10:28

You say its not that often... get a taxi?

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redskyatnight · 20/03/2014 10:28

You need to get them to school unless they are really too ill to go. What sort of an example are you setting?

Just under 2 miles is really not that far - I get that the DC will find it tiring at the end of the day - is there a park or somewhere you can stop off on the way home? Other than that get cycling and get the DCs on their own bikes as soon as you can.

My neighbour has what I think must be similar age children (Reception and pre-school) and they do the round trip to the juniors which is OVER 2 miles every day without any problems - just because they've got used to it, mum takes it slow on the way home etc.

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CoffeeTea103 · 20/03/2014 10:30

If the dc were genuinely not well you wouldn't feel the slight bit concerned enough to post on here.
It's because you know it's something wrong that you're doing, your reasoning is just not on. You can't make your kids miss school for a decision you made.

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BumpyGrindy · 20/03/2014 10:30

Summer's coming...weather will be better. You need to look at making some money on the side through Ebay or something in order to afford driving. I understand as we live away from school and I can't drive...but I ALWAYS get them there. I have in the past cycled or got a cab...cabs are expensive but they HAVE to get to school.

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WilsonFrickett · 20/03/2014 10:31

Get bikes, with a trailer for the littlest one. You'll do a 2 mile journey in 10 minutes, easy.

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youmakemydreams · 20/03/2014 10:31

Yabu you need a better plan. I say this as someone who made the same decision re schools and distance albeit for different reasons.
I also had the dilema of complicated buses. I totally get it's a horrible walk but you have to do it. I used to get a bus that took me a mile closer and walk the rest. If I was in a situation with a rotten feeling child I would take the door to door bus that meant I had to leave much earlier because it was a longer route to avoid having to make an under the weather child walk.

You really do need to get a plan in place. It really isn't an option to keep one off when your pre school child is also in school. Get a plan in place now so that it is routine rather than the stress off it being thrown on you when it actually happens.

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kilmuir · 20/03/2014 10:34

Yabvu.
Bikes, bike with trailer?

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formerbabe · 20/03/2014 10:35

Your eldest must be exhausted with all that walking! And you are walking 8 miles a day!

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SapphireMoon · 20/03/2014 10:35

My children go to a school once rated 'satisfactory', now got recent 'good'.
Suffers from snobs avoiding it though.....
Anyway, you have made your choice and have to get to the school.
Three wheeler bikes with big wheel barrow thing at front can fit fair few children in I think and cheaper than a car I imagine.

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BarbarianMum · 20/03/2014 10:37

Well, just so you have some variety in your responses Wink, I think it is fine for the youngest to occasionally miss preschool, if your oldest isn't up to the journey.

I also think if a dc is not well enough for a 2 mile walk, they are not well enough for school.

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ProudAS · 20/03/2014 10:38

Could you ask a neighbour to sit with your ill DC for an hour rather than drag them on school run?

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smokeandglitter · 20/03/2014 10:40

I would say the cycling idea is a good plan if feasible. Is it ok to get a taxi when not? I live in an expensive taxi area of greater London but there's one company that's great (most services are ten pound minimum but with my leg problems when it's hard to get to an appointment or take cats the short distance to the vets - I can't drive - this company does it for a fiver). Would it be worth having a phone round to see?

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woodrunner · 20/03/2014 10:49

How old are they? Can you get hold of a double buggy that they could both ride in? I did that when we lived a long way from school. Lots of mums raised their eyebrows at DS coming into school in a buggy, but they were all jumping into cars with their offspring and DS would otherwise have had a 1.5 mile walk which was too much for a summer born.

Agree that scooters and bikes are a great way forward and that missing preschool is no big deal, but missing school from Yr R onward would be a problem, so it's best not to get into the habit of it.

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