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AIBU?

MIL thinks I should stay overnight at a party when i'm 37 weeks pregnant

8 replies

buffythebarbieslayer · 19/03/2014 12:01

My SIL's 50th party is coming up and i'm 37 weeks pregnant. I don't want to stay overnight as I just need my own bed right now.

We've agreed to go for a couple of hours and dh will drive us home.

MIL seems to put out by this Hmm. She thinks it's a shame we'll miss out on time with SIL and other relatives we haven't seen for a while.

I love my MIL but she can be very focused on her own family and forget I have my own needs. She also seems to forget what it's like to be this pregnant.

OP posts:
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affinia · 19/03/2014 12:08

Its up to you where you sleep whether 37 weeks pregnant or not.

Turn her down kindly and you've done nothing wrong at all.

Enjoy your sleep. I hate sleeping over anywhere as a couple. DH and I only sleep well together in our own bed.

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LittleMissGerardButlersMinion · 19/03/2014 12:09

Pregnant or not pregnant you can sleep were you want, not where someone tells you!

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parallax80 · 19/03/2014 12:09

She is unreasonable to be put out, as it's your decision whether or not you want to stay over at a party. This would be true whether or not you were pregnant.

You are being unreasonable to assume that she should assume that you wouldn't want to stay over, despite being heavily pregnant. That's a very poorly worded sentence, but not everyone feels the same as you do (I went to stay with relatives to go walking somewhere 6 hours drive from home at 38 wks). Everyone has different feelings about this, and some people might be offended if they weren't given the option to stay over because they were pregnant.

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Scholes34 · 19/03/2014 12:15

parallax80 is right. I was 200 miles from home the day before DC2 was born at 40 weeks to go to a reunion. I just took my bag and notes with me and had an idea in my head of where all the hospitals were along the M1 for the return journey. Fortunately, we made it home for one night in my bed before he arrived by 10.00 am the next morning.

It's all about how you feel and how much you want to spend time with these people. Which takes priority for you - your bed or relatives?

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AuroraRoared · 19/03/2014 12:19

YANBU. Just politely decline her offer. You are an adult and can decide for yourself whether you stay over or not!

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ShadowOfTheDay · 19/03/2014 12:28

it is your SILs day - if you don't want to stay over, then don't .... but just kindly say you won't....

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Bejeena · 19/03/2014 12:28

Tell you MIL it is your choice. Also perhaps you won't even make it to 37 weeks, I had my little boy at 36 weeks. Sometimes dates are wrong, sometimes babies come early so at that stage it is impossible for you to commit to anything, you might not even be able to go at all

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Nocomet · 19/03/2014 12:34

I wouldn't care, my DSIS sleeps really badly in beds that aren't her own at anytime.

I can't see why saying firmly my back, hips whatever are getting creaky and I'll keep everyone awake needing the loo should cause huge offence.

If it does, DMIL will forget as soon as she has a new GC to coo over.

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