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AIBU?

To Think 'No' It's Not Something We Should Just Put Up With..

60 replies

NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 11:55

Warning TMI and long!

I have a variety of health problems (believe me I would have died in days of yonder) but there's one thats particularly worrying me.

Everytime I have an orgasm, I bleed. And I mean I have to run to the toilet because there's a gush of blood, about a cup full. Followed by extreme pains in my lower abdomen. It's not just through penetrative sex, it's orgasm and only orgasm. (good job I don't fake them!)

I've had all sorts of tests done, they've found nothing.

I recently saw a consultant, who had a look with a camera and put it up on the screen. She kept saying 'look at your cervix' and I didn't really want to, but she was insistent. There was a tiny scratch on it and she went 'aha, we have found the problem'. I told her that most definitely wasn't the problem, there was far too much blood, it doesn't explain the pain and doesn't explain why only during orgasm.

She then said 'oh well, it looks like it's something you'll just have to put up with - part of being a woman ey!' then a wink. Confused

I've been to A&E through the pain, I'm now terrified of the pain, I'm scared of the amount of blood... but it's something I should put up with because I'm a woman?

Sorry I know it's ranty but could do with some advice and if anyone has experienced the same?

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olidusUrsus · 19/03/2014 11:57

Get a new consultant. Can you ask for a second opinion?

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 11:59

I think I will have too. She's supposedly 'the best' Hmm I've been bounced from pillar to post. It's been going on for a while now, I had to wait for my birthday before they'd even give me a smear (I know the reasons why, and they can't help that, just very annoying when I'm experiencing these problems)

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Burren · 19/03/2014 12:00

Jesus Christ, no. What an appalling response. Your poor creature. Have experienced nothing of the kind ever, but that amount of pain and blood loss can't be 'nothing'. And I would be very surprised if a medic would have suggested that a man shooting gouts of blood from his penis on orgasm should just put up with it because 'it's part of being a man, eh?'

I would have said that a good consultant would be interested in such an unusual problem - that it's caused by orgasm, not penetration...? Were you tested for anaemia? The blood is clearly coming from somewhere - or is the suggestion that it's menstrual blood? Do you have endometriosis?

I'm sorry, no advice at all, but I would make a formal complaint about the way you have been palmed off, and try to find another doctor to try more tests.

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Pobblewhohasnotoes · 19/03/2014 12:02

Absolutely unacceptable. I would be asking for a second opinion.

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 12:03

Ah yes imagine if it was a man!! They'd be in hospital now Grin

I'd have thought so too, I've even researched medical journals I have access to and can't find anything of the like. I'm worried because it seems to be as though there must be blood building up somewhere, and then when my muscles contract it's sort of... shooting out?

I don't have endo, but do have anaemia so you'd think they'd take it more seriously. I'm at the end of my tether.

Thanks for replying, I think I will do as you all say and take it further. I was worried I was being dramatic and that I'd be told to deal with it ha

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Pobblewhohasnotoes · 19/03/2014 12:11

I'm assuming from your username you're a nurse? If so, come on! Get stroppy! We're very good at it!

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 12:15

Yes Pobble Grin I'm a right stroppy cow when it comes to advocating for my patients but for myself... I think it's because she made me feel like a child and like I was worrying for nothing. I'm not usually one to back down but I think it's partly because I felt vulnerable, legs in the air looking at my own cervix!

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TwittyMcTwitterson · 19/03/2014 21:21

Sorry to be vulgar but just to confirm, even if you have penetration that's basically 'vigorous' you still don't bleed? Just orgasm? And by lower abdomen do you mean womb/like period pains or cervix? Sorry to sound stupid, I'm no nurse but why is she only looking at your cervix and not higher?

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crispyporkbelly · 19/03/2014 21:23

I think you're going to have to orgasm on the drs table. Only way I'm afraid

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JeanSeberg · 19/03/2014 21:26

Not a bad idea or perhaps film the gushing/take in a sample.

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 21:27

Yes, I can have rough penetrative sex without orgasm I be fine, it's just when I orgasm. Even without penetration IYSWIM.

Me and DP have tested this Blush

Yes period type pains, then they go in about an hour or so

I've had an ultrasound and that was fine, but I can't help but think there must be something.

And exactly, the blood must be coming from deeper/higher so there's not much use just looking at the entrance of my cervix via camera.

I'm honestly bewildered. I've spoken to friends, colleagues, everyone about it. No-one knows!

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somethingwillturnup · 19/03/2014 21:28

That's what I was thinking crispy...not much help am I?

But to answer your question, no, you shouldn't just have to put up with it. Is there any way of checking it's not menstrual blood? Just to put your mind at rest on that score? Are you sure it's all blood, and not just fluid that is maybe tainted with blood from the cervical erosion? I would've thought someone would be interested in this, even if it was just for the rarity value. Might be difficult to actually find that someone though.

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ThreeBeeOneGee · 19/03/2014 21:29

Do you have a coil? The smooth muscle contractions in the uterus could be causing the coil to irritate the lining or something?

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 21:31

crisp I'm actually tempted. I wonder if I strolled in with my rabbit in tow, they'd take me seriously then.

I'd gone straight to A&E the last time it happened and showed them the blood soaked pad, in fact it took two massive pads. It'd definitely fresh blood, and I have periods as normal which is even more confusing.

Should I go on Embarrassing Bodies Blush

And I thank you all for talking through my TMI bloody problem! Thanks

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FightingOverImaginaryIcecream · 19/03/2014 21:33

I have absolutely no idea what it could be, but certainly doesn't sound like you should be fobbed off as 'part of being a woman'. Yes, being a woman means putting up with blood and pain once a month, I've always been told that blood or pain at other times was unusual and should be investigated though.

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wishful75 · 19/03/2014 21:39

This is a long shot op but......

I used to get horrific abdominal cramps after orgasm with some spotting too, not as much blood as you but the pain used to put me off entirely. Nothing to to with sex itself, only orgasm.

Nothing was ever found to be wrong so I just put up with it........a couple of years later after one misdiagnosis after another it was discovered my thyroid was completely out of of control. 2 years of meds and it seemed to sort itself out....no pain on orgasm whatsoever now and no spotting either.

my endocrinologist told me that the thyroid has a huge effect on a woman's hormones, menstruation and fertility in general. Might be worth asking your gp for a thyroid blood test?

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TwittyMcTwitterson · 19/03/2014 21:40

Very strange. You must be right in thinking it's to do with contracting but if it's fresh blood, it can't be 'stored' waiting to come out can it?

Is it a shot of blood followed by pain or you continue to bleed until the pain has gone? I'm so so shocked by the consultant. Hmm

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youarewinning · 19/03/2014 21:41

www.netdoctor.co.uk/interactive/discussion/Bleeding-after-Orgasm--Bleeding-for-4-weeks-t84334-f26.html

Anything on here ^^ useful? I agree that it needs thoroughly investigating

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JeanSeberg · 19/03/2014 21:42

Are we talking clitoral orgasm (so it happens without penetration and/or when you're alone)?

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 22:03

Wishful thankyou I'll have a look into that! And I'm sorry you had something similar, awful isn't it!

evees that's what I keep thinking of, I have images of this little blood reservoir somewhere insideConfused It's like a gush of blood as soon as I orgasm, pain comes almost instantaneously, and I continue to spot for about an hour whilst the pain is still there.

youare thankyou I'll look at that!

and jean yes in fact the first time it happened was when I was alone having erm.. me time. Imagine my shock! Then it happened with DP...


Thankyou all so much it's made me feel so much better talking about it with women who aren't condescending and making me feel silly!

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 22:03

I'm going to book a thyroid blood test tomorrow wishful Thanks

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JeanSeberg · 19/03/2014 22:06

I hope you get it sorted, don't give up. Thanks

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NurseyWursey · 19/03/2014 22:12

Thanks Thanks

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FuzzyWuzzywasaWoman · 19/03/2014 22:32

Where does female ejaculate come from? I'm sure I've read it's the bladder not the vagina? Could it be worth asking for a refer to a urologist for a cystoscopy perhaps?

I've just done a v.quick search and there seems to be a relpy to the same question stating that bleeding in female ejaculate could be due to stimulation trauma from the small capillaries in the "G spot" area on the anterior vaginal wall.

Sorry hope you get it sorted.

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FunkyBoldRibena · 19/03/2014 22:50

Where's House when you need him eh?

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