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AIBU?

To take myself out for dinner?

65 replies

PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 21:58

I have recently started singing in a choir which rehearses far enough away from home that I can't get home from work and out again to choir without having such a short space of time at home that it would be pointless. (I have a long commute to work as well). I therefore have the choice of staying late at work before going to choir, or going into town and killing time before choir.

Last night the journey was quick and I ended up in town with a good hour and a half to kill before choir. I was hungry. Therefore, I took myself out for dinner to a dim sum restaurant and had a cocktail . It was lovely and I went to choir full and happy.

Today I told people at work what I'd done. One or two said 'oh how lovely!' But the majority were horrified- 'REALLY?!' 'I could never do that!' One chap made a sympathetic face and said 'Could you not find anyone to go with you?'

This attitude confuses me and pisses me off. As an adult, why is it abnormal for me to go and eat dinner on my own if I'm hungry? Why should I need or want anyone else?

Just wondering if IABU and I am the weird one? Or do others do this and it's my colleagues who are BU?

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YouTheCat · 18/03/2014 22:00

I think it's sad they'd rather be hungry than have something nice to eat. So what you were on your own?

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Guitargirl · 18/03/2014 22:01

Yabvnu

Your colleagues on the other hand seem like children.

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sandyballs · 18/03/2014 22:02

Sounds fab. I love eating out on my own occasionally.

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SingSongSlummy · 18/03/2014 22:03

Crazy colleagues! I have worked away from home a lot and rather enjoy a quiet solitary meal with my book!

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TheSkiingGardener · 18/03/2014 22:03

Exactly what I would do, it sounds great! I know lots of people that wouldn't countenance the idea of eating alone in a restaurant though. Apparently you spend the entire time in a miasma of shame and embarrassment. Can't say I've ever felt that but I think people do struggle with it.

Glad you enjoyed it, if I were you I'd be planning all the restaurants I could try each week.

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Chippednailvarnish · 18/03/2014 22:04

YANBU - I often had to do this when I travelled with work.


and I miss it!

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Mintyy · 18/03/2014 22:04

Your colleagues are the weird ones.

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TwelveLeggedWalk · 18/03/2014 22:04

God no, kindle + dim sum +cocktail minus children sounds like heaven to me.
If you wanted to be more sociable you could see if anyone in your choir was in the same boat, but frankly for one night a week I'd enjoy the peace and quiet!

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 22:05

Yay, lots of solitary diners on the thread! And The SkiingGardener I have already had that thought- I'm thinking tapas and a nice glass of sangria next week Grin

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AgentProvocateur · 18/03/2014 22:05

I love it if I'm away for work and I get to eat on my own with a book. YANBU

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rookiemater · 18/03/2014 22:06

YANBU - I quite like eating alone. I wouldn't go to a posh restaurant, but often go to Yo Sushi for lunch and quite happily pass the time watching the conveyor belt and the other people or we have a great veggie place which has lots of folks on their own.

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Chloerose75 · 18/03/2014 22:07

I would prefer to eat with others if going to a nice long chatty meal, of course, but if you just want something nice to eat and have a short gap to yourself to do it I don't see a problem with going it alone and at least having something nice, better than a macdonalds or something! I think the colleagues saying ooh I could never are the insecure ones.

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 22:08

I suppose I could TwelveLeggedWalk but frankly, that would involve more effort than I'm willing to make :)
I have a very busy job in which I am constantly interacting with people and to be honest, I relish the peace and quiet.

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LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 18/03/2014 22:08

I used to love a café lunch on my own, a coffee and a hot beef sarnie with a book. Bliss!
YWNBU!

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 22:11

Interesting to see some responses making distinctions about where/when they would eat on their own. I wouldn't think twice about having a cafe lunch alone and have been doing so since I was at university. However, last night was my first actual restaurant dinner by myself. I can tell you though, it certainly won't be the last!

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TwelveLeggedWalk · 18/03/2014 22:12

God I really really want dim sum and a cocktail now. Is it a Ping Pong? Bloody countryside, not enough pan Asian cocktail bars in amongst the fields round here.

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 22:13

YES a Ping Pong! I love Ping Pong. I want another one now- I could live off their roast pork puffs!

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TwelveLeggedWalk · 18/03/2014 22:14

Blocking this thread now, too upsetting Grin

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Lovecat · 18/03/2014 22:14

I've had breakfast and lunch alone (in fact I had breakfast this morning in a cafe while DD was with her dyslexia tutor) but never dinner, for no reason I can think of.

As long as I had a book it wouldn't phase me. In fact cocktails and dim sum without anyone there to be stealing the spare char sui bun sounds wonderful... :o

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MomOfTwoGirls2 · 18/03/2014 22:17

Good on you OP. I eat alone on business trips, I enjoy a nice meal with a glass or two of red wine. I do bring a book of iPad to read between courses, and to enjoy with my wine.

I would totally eat on my own before my hobbie in your situation. Lucky you to have the time to do it!!

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 22:17

Spare char sui bun Lovecat? I'm afraid you're confusing me- I've never heard of such a thing Grin

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CointreauVersial · 18/03/2014 22:20

I'd do that, for sure. I have happy memories of dining alone while travelling on business; also as a student when I backpacked around the US I treated myself occasionally (and was fussed over and spoiled by waiters).

I have to have something to read, though.

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 18/03/2014 22:23

I did have a book but most of the time I just watched the world go by, as I asked for a window seat for that very purpose :)

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SolidGoldBrass · 18/03/2014 22:26

I do it quite a lot - or at least I used to as I travelled for business purposes a fair bit in the past.

The only reason I don't do it now is lack of money.

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whois · 18/03/2014 22:28

Oh I'm 100% with you OP! It's a enjoyable thing to have a nice meal and a drink on your own and watch the world go by. I love seeing my friends, but if I'm out and about in my own, or staying away with work in happy to go somewhere or eat on my own.

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