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to be a bit hurt by this comment by friend's DD

(63 Posts)
roastedalmondfudge Tue 18-Mar-14 21:33:08

Well, I probably am. See what you think.

Friend's DD is 16. It's a pure coincidence as sometimes happen but the DD learns dance from another friend of mine.

So I was talking about an upcoming trip to Edinburgh and we were going to see the ballet and the DD came into the kitchen. I said "oh, (friend's DD) I was just saying how we're (ramble about the ballet.)"

DD sneers and says, "You being friends with Miss X is weird."
"Why?" I laugh, thinking she meant "coincidence."
"Well, it's weird you two are friends, you're not alike."
I said, "How do you mean?" more bemused than anything. The DD shrugs and says, "I dunno," (in a voice that suggests she DOES know" - "she's ... pretty."

Erm - AIBU?

moominmarvellous Tue 18-Mar-14 21:43:57

YANBU - that's a really bitchy thing to say and at the age of 16, I'd expect her to understand the impact of saying that kind of thing.

I think I'd have come back with 'Hmmmmm, interesting you should say that, as I often wonder about some of DD's friends as well......'

.....Actually I'd probably have been too shocked and said nothing but she'd be waaaay down in my estimations.

BrianTheMole Tue 18-Mar-14 21:47:11

Thats really rude. I would have told her that. At 16 she should know better than that.

WitchWay Tue 18-Mar-14 21:47:44

What a horrible girl angry

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks Tue 18-Mar-14 21:48:04

YANBU, and her parent should have pulled her up on that comment!

SamandCat Tue 18-Mar-14 21:48:09

I think you are projecting onto this situation.
Why do you think she meant difference in looks, which ime has no beqring on friendships.Are you sure she didn't mean different interests/age/job etc

largeginandtonic Tue 18-Mar-14 21:48:40

I'd have asked if she meant to a rude little horror.

roastedalmondfudge Tue 18-Mar-14 21:50:16

Sam - because she said "she's pretty"!

Ah, thanks people - I was/am really pretty upset by it to be honest which is stupid I know, but I daresay the girl has issues of her own. Horrible thing to say though. I hope she cringes when she remembers it in ten years time!

Only1scoop Tue 18-Mar-14 21:51:14

What did the mum<your friend> say ?

chattychattyboomba Tue 18-Mar-14 21:52:31

That's awful! I would have said something patronising like "I think dear, as you get older you will realise what true beauty is, and what you just said, is truly ugly".
I know it probably doesn't make you feel any better though. What a little cow. 16 is such a mean age.

Samhainslass Tue 18-Mar-14 21:52:44

Hormones and immaturity never do mix well.

VoyageDeVerity Tue 18-Mar-14 21:52:46

That was a horrible thing to say.

Would put me right off her.

dollymixedup Tue 18-Mar-14 21:52:48

Maybe its just how she perceives you as her mums friend (and all that entails) and her dance teacher as an interesting/independent/exotic adult.

roastedalmondfudge Tue 18-Mar-14 21:53:02

Said the girl's name in a shocked tone, to which the girl did a Kevin-the-teenager "What? What?" thing to grin

Not friend's fault, but I just was so shocked at how bitchy it was.

VoyageDeVerity Tue 18-Mar-14 21:53:59

Is that all the other mum did! I would have been mortified!

roastedalmondfudge Tue 18-Mar-14 21:54:23

Dolly - but she said "you are different ... she's pretty."

I don't think it could have been any clearer that she thinks I'm a bog-trotting beast, which may have some truth in it wink BUT I'd rather not hear it!

roastedalmondfudge Tue 18-Mar-14 21:55:04

Voyage, I don't think she knew what to say to be honest, none of us did! Wish I'd had a clever retort ready but I was shocked!

dollymixedup Tue 18-Mar-14 21:55:41

I'm not defending her btw and YANBU to feel a bit hurt.

Paintyfingers Tue 18-Mar-14 21:55:48

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pumpkinpositive Tue 18-Mar-14 21:55:56

How long has she been friends with your DD? She sounds a right little cow.

You should have said, "Well, look at you and my DD. Do you think she's your friend out of pity?"

Salmotrutta Tue 18-Mar-14 21:57:07

You can bet her Mum gave her a right earful afterwards!

At least I hope so...

roastedalmondfudge Tue 18-Mar-14 22:01:06

Pumpkin - the comment was about me - if it had been about my child she'd have been floored by me (verbally, at least) but I was [shocked]

She isn't a particularly nice girl!

dollymixedup Tue 18-Mar-14 22:01:19

Thats what I meant Paintyfingers.

I think being friends with mum may mean you are a seen as a frump.

Teens can be everso tactless.

SamandCat Tue 18-Mar-14 22:03:09

Oh Ok I misunderstood your post

SinisterBuggyMonth Tue 18-Mar-14 22:03:18

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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