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To ask how long it took to sleep train your DC, if you used sleep training?

(16 Posts)
Reasonablydesperate Mon 17-Mar-14 08:21:37

I always said I wold never, ever sleep train DD (5 months). She's my baby, not a monkey. But recently we hit a new low where she was waking up every 20 minutes and needing to feed back to sleep, so reluctantly, I agreed that we needed to do something. We asked a sleep trainer to visit us for a few nights and it's true that the results were pretty amazing - in two nights, DD was going 7-7 without needing a feed (although she was waking up a few times still). I was willing to do this, and to allow her to cry for a short while, being picked up for a cuddle every 4 minutes of crying, as I understood that the idea was that after a week or so, she would stop waking up, realising that it wasn't playtime and it wasn't breakfast time either. However, two weeks on and she's still waking up at 3 am and 5 am without fail, and is now getting really upset when we try to get her back to sleep without feeding her - by cuddling, rocking, patting her etc. I know she isn't very hungry because when I offer her food in the morning she sometimes isn't really that bothered. It's comfort she wants and I am utterly miserable knowing that she is crying because I am choosing not to give it to her. Last night was awful and she cried for an hour and a half before I couldn't do it anymore and fed her to sleep. DH is away with work this week and the idea of doing this again on my own tonight makes me want to sob. Can I ask how long it took for sleep training to work with your DC? It is absolutely horrific and I feel like the worst mother in the world.

Forgettable Mon 17-Mar-14 08:34:17

We did it but much older -18 months. It took three nights.

5 months is far too young. Small babies do wake loads. Said kindly, you might need to adjust your expectations and accept that sleep will continue to be in small blocks for a while yet.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 17-Mar-14 08:37:31

5 months is too young. Ds was 2.5 and leading us a merry dancehmm

Little babies wake up, it's a killersad

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 17-Mar-14 08:38:52

There is NOTHING wrong with feeding a tiny baby to sleep, it's perfectly natural.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 17-Mar-14 08:39:37

brew thanks

TarkaTheOtter Mon 17-Mar-14 08:41:33

I've done it with an older baby and it took one night then drastic improvement, then three nights til sleeping through.
I'd suggest your baby is still hungry.

arethereanyleftatall Mon 17-Mar-14 08:45:46

1 night, but I think 5 months is still a bit too young to go 12 hours without feeding. Also, I think if you gave it 1.5 hours, then you gave it a really good go. I ould wait till she's on 3 meals a day then try again.

dolphinsandwhales Mon 17-Mar-14 08:46:12

You did this at 5mo?! Poor dd, sleep trainers are there to make money from you. There's nothing wrong with feeding to sleep, she's hungry, she has a tiny stomach. Even if she wants comfort, why would you withhold comfort from a baby? Have a look at Dr Sears website, good luck!

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 17-Mar-14 08:48:43

What time it's she going to bed OP? Waking at 3 am and then again at 5 sounds normal tbh. I think possibly you had an unusual first baby so this has come as an almighty shock.

Forget sleep training, you need to do what you can to get through the week, co sleep, feed to sleep, whatever it takes. You won't start 'bad habits' you just need to provide food and comfort which is as important as food at this age x

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 17-Mar-14 08:51:20

I'm sorry OP I thought you had an older child who sleep through.

Just because a baby can sleep through a couple of times it doesn't mean they will continue to do it especially add they grow and need more good.

Sunnysummer Mon 17-Mar-14 08:53:30

Every 20 minutes does sound like hell, but twice in a night is pretty normal, unfortunately. Can you do shifts with DH in the morning or evening so you get extra sleep? Or feeding to sleep twice doesn't sound like a disaster, you could always gently revisit the training principles once she's a little older if she hasn't grown out of it yet.

MeepMeepVrooom Mon 17-Mar-14 08:55:31

Sorry another that thinks 5 months is too young. In fact I'm sure that the guidelines for CC is that it is dangerous for a baby under 6(?) months.

I did CC with my DD at about 14 months after 4 months of no sleep, she had always been an ok sleeper before that stage. It took 3 nights for no tears at bedtime but she slept through till morning on those 3 nights. We have had periods of regression where we've had to start again but I honestly think it's just them going through various stages and the older they get it isn't they can't sleep but don't want to miss out on what going on in other rooms.

I would say to feed your baby and comfort just now, you may find he'll do it himself in a few weeks or months. Personally I would give it to a minimum of 12 months before revisiting CC but that's just me.

soverylucky Mon 17-Mar-14 08:57:27

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jaggythistle Mon 17-Mar-14 08:57:40

She is too young. Feed her.

No idea where your 'sleep trainer' made up their shit from.

Sorry but your baby is not likely to sleep through at this age.

QueenofKelsingra Mon 17-Mar-14 09:01:54

In a way we did sleep training from day one with all of ours. between the hours of 11pm and 5am (in the very early days) the lights would stay off, just a nightlight to be able to locate child! no eye contact, no talking, offer milk. as they got older we increased 'night time' until we ended up with 7pm to 6am by the time they were around 4 months. whenever they woke they were offered milk - they either fed or went straight back into the cot. baby still got cuddled and offered milk but learned very quickly that night time was for sleeping. they only woke for milk from about 4-6weeks outside of illness or teething - but even then we gave calpol, offered milk and then back to bed once calm in arms.

mine started actually sleeping through at around 4 months intermittently and reliably by 5.5-6m.

QueenofKelsingra Mon 17-Mar-14 09:04:28

to add...there was very little crying in this method, they knew I came when they called but they also knew the only option was milk when I did come.

we had to do a few cry it out nights when they went through the clingy 8/9/10 month ages for each of them though.

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