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Not to invite one boy from ds's football team to his bday party??

(73 Posts)
CocktailQueen Fri 14-Mar-14 21:45:48

DS has never got on with one boy from his team. There are ten of them. Other boy is rough and kicks and pushes DS all the time. I don't like him. Wibu not to invite him to his football bday party? Other boys in the team have asked all team members. Can't decide... There will be other boy's there apart from team boys.

LEMmingaround Fri 14-Mar-14 21:48:35

what does your son want?

Sirzy Fri 14-Mar-14 21:49:43

I think leaving one child out is unfair

NinjaBunny Fri 14-Mar-14 21:50:54

It's fine.

Why would you want someone who pushes and shoves at your child's party?

I don't get the whole 'not excluding children' thing. If they're unkind/badly behaved then I doubt they'd even expect an invite. It also teaches them they can do what the fuck they like with no consequences.

It's your home. You have who you want in it.


BettyBotter Fri 14-Mar-14 21:51:38

How old?

TheGreatHunt Fri 14-Mar-14 21:52:07

Surely your ds decides?

NinjaBunny Fri 14-Mar-14 21:52:11

Oh, just kicks and pushes your DS?

Then definitely not!

You can't have your child being kicked and pushed around at his own party.


ChickyEgg Fri 14-Mar-14 21:55:27

I don't understand the 'not excluding children' either. Its his party, he can have who he likes there. Not some child who bullies him!

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 14-Mar-14 21:55:56

Kicks and pushes on the field, or off?

FernieB Fri 14-Mar-14 21:57:57

From your DS's point of view you are being perfectly reasonable. Other parents may not see it that way.

When it comes to parties for my DDs I have always allowed them to choose their guests themselves. One year this meant that all the girls from their class were invited except one. As she had physically and verbally attacked them during the year I wasn't surprised they didn't want her there. I don't think her parents were surprised either. If other parents thought it was odd they didn't say anything, but I think they understood.

Does your DS want to invite this boy or not?

CoffeeTea103 Fri 14-Mar-14 21:58:03

It's a mn thing, 'must not exclude children'. In real life, people do not tolerate children who abuse/bullies their child. Even if it's just one child, why would you do something that upsets your own child.
Yanbu to leave him out.

Nanny0gg Fri 14-Mar-14 21:58:27

Excluding him will probably reinforce his bad behaviour. And does he do it out of malice or is there another reason?

And it would be kinder to take the moral high ground. I assume there will be enough adults to keep an eye?

NK493efc93X1277dd3d6d4 Fri 14-Mar-14 22:02:14

Yanbu, why on earth should your son be obliged to have someone who bullies him at his own party!

NinjaBunny Fri 14-Mar-14 22:10:22

I once invited DS's whole class except for one child.

He's deeply unpleasant, very aggressive, violent and very used to getting his own way.

Not putting up with that, not fair on myself, DS or other children who were in my care and could possibly be explaining bruises and knocked out teeth to their parents.

Fuck, no!!

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 14-Mar-14 22:11:13

It's a mn thing, 'must not exclude children'. It obviously isn't, since he has been invited to every other party, according to the OP.

CocktailQueen Fri 14-Mar-14 22:11:25

DS asked today if we had to invite him! He doesn't want to.

TheGreatHunt Fri 14-Mar-14 22:12:23

Then don't invite him! Job done.

CocktailQueen Fri 14-Mar-14 22:12:53

Terry - he is good friends with the other boys in the club who have had parties so far, so would be invited anyway.

FernieB Fri 14-Mar-14 22:14:20

It's your DS's party he should choose his guests. Don't force him to have someone there he doesn't like. Presumably you are going to spend a bit on the party and would like your DS to enjoy it.

Viviennemary Fri 14-Mar-14 22:14:41

I'm not keen on leaving one child out. It's just simply not right.

CocktailQueen Fri 14-Mar-14 22:14:54

DS is 6, and other boy pushes and shoves him at football and at school - where they play footy at break and lunch. Gah.

gamerchick Fri 14-Mar-14 22:15:06

So how old are they?

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 14-Mar-14 22:15:07

Why does he target your DS? Is the coach doing anything about it?

MrsTerryPratchett Fri 14-Mar-14 22:15:30

Is the school doing anything?

gamerchick Fri 14-Mar-14 22:16:13

6 no.. but you're going to do what you want anyway.

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