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To say something to my cousin?

(19 Posts)
brokenhearted55a Sat 01-Mar-14 23:06:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MamaPain Sat 01-Mar-14 23:10:38

YABU, she can post what she likes as long as it isn't offensive.

CailinDana Sat 01-Mar-14 23:11:11

What's the problem with the pictures being public? Are you worried the children might object when they're older?

midnightagents Sat 01-Mar-14 23:13:55

Yabu just my opinion of course, but I i don't see the harm. It's best to have private settings and not put addresses etc up. But apart from that I think it's pretty harmless putting pics on fb.

I wouldn't comment on the pic because she clearly meant it in a light hearted jokey way, and if you say something it might get her back up, or make her think you are judging her.

I don't think there's a big risk of harm coming to anyone from these photos so best to leave it I reckon.

WorraLiberty Sat 01-Mar-14 23:14:22

I don't know why everyone's worried about people seeing their kids

I can't think how they cope when they're out in public?

Either way, your comment sounds a bit snippy.

If you feel you need to say something, just inbox her and say "Hi, nice pics of the kids. By the way, do you know your settings are public?"

Abbierhodes Sat 01-Mar-14 23:15:17

I'm really struggling to understand the problem here!

brokenhearted55a Sat 01-Mar-14 23:17:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brokenhearted55a Sat 01-Mar-14 23:19:16

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WorraLiberty Sat 01-Mar-14 23:20:49

I would just be pissed if my mum put virtually everything I did on fb.

God so would I

When I was a kid I used to cringe when family came to visit and my Mum got my photos out. I really hated it.

That's why I feel truly sorry for today's kids. They might be internet savvy and not leave a web trail for themselves, but many parents will fuck that up for them.

They forget, once a photo is on the internet it's there for people to do what they want with.

At least my mum could close the family album and put it back in the cupboard.

But I still think you should stay out of it...or send a private message if you must comment.

nennypops Sat 01-Mar-14 23:22:46

There's no harm in what she posts but pictures of little girls in leotards is the type of thing some deeply unpleasant people get off on. I wouldn't be too happy at the thought of some perv drooling over dd.

LetTheRiverAnswer Sat 01-Mar-14 23:58:39

Id mention it. Either in person or in a message. If you get on ok I think you could probably do it without causing offence. She might well have just not thought about it. I'm sure setting it to friends-of-friends would still allow plenty of people to share her photos, "public" is a bit uneccessary.

AgentZigzag Sun 02-Mar-14 00:46:41

Thing is with telling her how it might look to other people is that she obviously sees it as a cute picture of her DD dressing up in mums shoes, and you'd be introducing a sexual element she won't be thinking of.

She could take that as a bit creepy and wonder WTF is going on in your head to think such a thing.

FWIW I agree with you, I look at a lot of fb profiles for work and the majority of the UK (other countries profile pictures are completely different) older teens/early twenties (of both sexes) are pictures that could be described as them 'selling themselves', in the same way you'd get dressed up to the nines going to a nightclub with the intent to pull (can't think of a nicer way of putting it).

Some of them have a pose that they've made all their own grin just photo after photo of them hand on hip pulling the same duck face grin

EBearhug Sun 02-Mar-14 00:56:01

I'd probably mention it in passing - "BTW, do you know your FB photos are totally public? Your Instagram's really tied down, so I just wondered if your security settings had changed on FB."

splasheeny Sun 02-Mar-14 01:12:43

I don't see the problem with having children's photos on facebook, and it is totally her call. The most you could do is ask her is she's aware that its totally public.

pastaNcheese Sun 02-Mar-14 04:39:37

I don't share pics of my DD online. I just feel that if I wanted to show someone pics of her, I would. I don't see the need to share them with my old school friends I haven't spoken to in 5 years.

I don't know your cousin's circumstances though. Maybe she has Facebook precisely for sharing with a select few people she has as friends?

Regardless, it's her choice and I think YWBU to mention it and assume she isn't already considering her children's welfare.

YankeeMum8 Sun 02-Mar-14 05:14:52

I wouldn't say anything .

Chottie Sun 02-Mar-14 05:24:51

I would say something about her privacy settings.

bragmatic Sun 02-Mar-14 07:40:27

I'd assume she didn't know they were public, if she has tight controls on Instagram.

brokenhearted55a Sun 02-Mar-14 08:45:29

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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