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To leave this person outside waiting?

(12 Posts)
OurMiracle1106 Sat 01-Mar-14 21:37:24

A boy has just knocked for one of my house mates, as often one of the other house mates brothers does, which I have no problem with and will happily buzz him in and let him up. However the boy that has come tonight is to do with another house mate and they have a record for turning up knowing the person they are here to visit isn't here nor will they be, letting their friends in, eating mine and the other house mates food, leaving a mess, and most recently last time they were here my handbag was gone through, money taken from my purse and my oyster gone. I found this the following morning.

Two days later someone tried booting off our front door and the flat downstair's door <where they lived until evicted two weeks ago>

I therefore told him I wasn't buzzing him in, giving no reason why and he would have to wait for the flatmate he was waiting for to return and hung up.

I know its cold and raining, and they were made homeless and have since been told that their mum has breast cancer, HOWEVER, that is no reason to disrespect me and the other house mate, and use our home as a community centre, doing illegal substances on the side for me to have to deal with.

AIBU because apparently I am just being a "bi**h" about it and they don't need to deal with me being vindictive and spiteful.

ToootSweet Sat 01-Mar-14 21:40:16

I think you need to find somewhere else to live.

kc77 Sat 01-Mar-14 21:42:41

Yadnbu, it is your home, not a doss house for every tom, dick or Harry.

Pumpkinpositive Sat 01-Mar-14 21:43:51

Have you spoken to the other housemate about this?

Fairenuff Sat 01-Mar-14 21:44:00

How old is the boy and how old is your housemate?

AgentZigzag Sat 01-Mar-14 21:45:44

Was it this lad who definitely went through your handbag?

What made you think it was him who was booting your door?

YANBU to buzz/not buzz whoever the fuck you want in, and I know his situation isn't your responsibility, but maybe they do have a point in that you could cut him a bit of slack when he's going through all that.

Pipbin Sat 01-Mar-14 21:47:17

YANBU. Yes he's having a shit time right now but he hasn't done much to get sympathy.
Yes, find somewhere else to live.

Anonymai Sat 01-Mar-14 21:47:26

Are you the poster whose housemates friends make vulgar comments to you? You really need somewhere new and safe to live. New house share maybe.

JackNoneReacher Sat 01-Mar-14 21:50:00

YANBU.
YANB a bitch.

They don't need to deal with you, they can go elsewhere.

Don't let anyone into your home you're not comfortable with.

OurMiracle1106 Sat 01-Mar-14 21:54:06

They are early twenties as am I, I don't have the option of finding somewhere else to live as I was rehoused as I was homeless. It just seemed coincidental the day after they were evicted the door to our house was damaged and almost booted off and their door was booted off and he among some of his friends were found in their old house, however as it was a Saturday morning when I found it <was told the night before> the police couldn't contact the agents so couldn't remove them as they couldn't prove they were there illegally.

He was the only other person in the house at the same time as my bedroom door being unlocked. I only went toilet twice whilst he was here, but my hand bag was only just inside my room.

Me and the other reasonable house mate who are actually sleeping here every night have tried speaking to the house mate he is here to visit <who is maybe seen twice a month but claiming housing benefit> but in response gave these boys the key to our flat door but not his room. It resulted in me complaining to the agency and he has received several warnings regards of this.

To be fair, if things hadn't been going missing, I hadn't spent 3 hours having to clean up behind them before, there wasn't drugs involved and they didn't let a whole load of their friends in, I probably would be happy to let them come up and sit and chill in my room with me. However their lack of respect, going through cupboards they know aren't their friends and taking food drink and even my anti depressants going missing < I suspect they mixed it with the cocaine they were taking off my sides>

wightjellybaby Sat 01-Mar-14 21:56:03

I dont buzz people n here (converted house 6flats) to wait on the stairs or bang on the door untill people to come home. Ive taken to shouting at them through the intercom instead as they tend to do ot when dd is in bed and the buzzer is loud and wakes her. People who we have round all ring or text us before they come.

It might sound harsh but their situation is not your fault or your problem its theirs and theirs to sort out. If he wants to see his friend then he can wait outside or elsewhere as he would if you weren't in.

Fairenuff Sat 01-Mar-14 21:57:39

Oh, sorry OP, I thought you meant they were 14 or 16 year old boys, not men in their twenties.

Keep the doors locked and don't let them in.

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