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to not understand why Purdy on First Dates gets such a negative reaction from men?

(65 Posts)
physallis Sat 01-Mar-14 19:23:12

So, have been watching First Dates (if you've not seen it, Channel 4 reality prog where strangers meet in a restaurant for first dates. Bit like online dating - I think they see photos first - but obviously it's filmed, and at the end they give a bit of feedback etc).

Anyway, one of the girls on it, Purdy (who says she's never had a relationship) has been knocked back by both her dates so far, who say she's too talkative.

Some of the comments I've seen online from men discussing the are that she's too full on, needs to calm the fuck down etc, which I don't get, as I think she's pretty great (she reminds me in some ways of a younger version of myself!) and I thought being chatty, confident etc were positive qualities on dates - surely no-one wants to sit in silence?!

Linky to her date in the most recent episode...

AlexVause Sat 01-Mar-14 19:27:54

YANBU, I think she's great! Better than sitting in an awkward silence.

WillYouDoTheFandango Sat 01-Mar-14 19:29:10

She was a bit full on tbf. She seems nice but comes across as a bit of a nervous blatherer, which obviously must put some men off.

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 01-Mar-14 19:30:32

Do you mean the posh one? She was awful.

Excitedforxmas Sat 01-Mar-14 19:31:48

No one else can get a word in edge ways!

LeslieKnope Sat 01-Mar-14 19:31:52

Because she comes across like a self absorbed twat who only wants to talk about herself?

Add in the unbearable rah voice and laugh and I can see why the men aren't keen.

LeslieKnope Sat 01-Mar-14 19:33:03

That said, she's still better than the sexist gobshite men they have chosen this series.

What's that about??

MamaPain Sat 01-Mar-14 19:33:52

She's very sweet and I don't want to be mean because she's young but she's awful!

She reminds me of the assistants from Ab Fab.

She seems to love the sound of her own voice and the men are just giving her the SHUT THE FUCK UP look. She doesn't know when to stop and take a breath. Her jokes or anecdotes are so long-winded. Comes across a bit like a hyped up mother of the bride.

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 01-Mar-14 19:40:43

Yes, I feel bad for saying awful- she is nothing compared to that horrendous young fella coming out with those cheesy pick up lines.

physallis Sat 01-Mar-14 19:42:22

She's a bit posh, but what's wrong with her laugh?

I thought she comes across as very friendly - especially the part where she's chatting to the girl in the loos.

Is talkative a bad thing then?

MamaPain Sat 01-Mar-14 19:45:00

The laugh is like a snorting cackle which goes on way too long.

Yes she's probably more popular as a friend, particularly to women, although I think even I'd find her draining. It's not really date or relationship behaviour though.

Could you imagine living with her, I'd spend lots of time hiding in the loo my DHs morning activities all make sense now!

Pippintea Sat 01-Mar-14 19:47:14

I think she's very pretty and sweet! Bit posh but heck, the first 'chap' she dated wasn't exactly down healed.
She's a lot nicer than a lot of the girls on the show.
I love it! Re watched series 1this week!

Teeb Sat 01-Mar-14 19:48:18

Oh it is an annoying laugh.

I think some people don't seem to have any filter when it comes to talking, which you either love or you feel a bit stifled by the onslaught.

She's young and nervous though, lord knows I wouldn't do it!

cees Sat 01-Mar-14 19:51:17

Well talking non-stop from the moment she meets her date is just rude, if you want to get to know someone then you have to shut up long enough for them to respond.

Anonymai Sat 01-Mar-14 19:53:03

Perhaps it comes across as a bit of a performance rather than a genuine date to the other person. This isn't the first tv show she's popped up on.

physallis Sat 01-Mar-14 20:00:15

MamaPain in what way not date behaviour? I thought usual dating advice (that I've read on here and elsewhere) was to be chatty, smiley, etc, which as far as I can see she is being?

I didn't see it as a 'performance' Anonymai, like I said above, she reminds me of my younger self (albeit a lot less posh) and at least in my case that was me being me, not an act for the camera!

monkeynuts123 Sat 01-Mar-14 20:01:13

She's everything that men don't like - over keen, pulls silly face (scares men that she'll look like that when throwing a tantrum) she seems unstable if not good fun, will she EVER shut up, she's intense and she does silly voices. Men hate all that. Men like calm, serene, low maintenance, adult. That's why it took me 20 years to find a husband ;-)

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 01-Mar-14 20:02:34

I don't think being overly talkative is great. It is exhausting.

I'm not sure purdy has ever had an unexpressed thought.

She'll grow up though...

furlinedsheepskinjacket Sat 01-Mar-14 20:03:01

yy to all above

a girls girl

MamaPain Sat 01-Mar-14 20:05:46

You're meant to be there to get to know each other, not treat them to a monologue.

weirdthing Sat 01-Mar-14 20:06:47

The pony-tailed history goth guy was pretty awful. He just talked about himself.

JohnFarleysRuskin Sat 01-Mar-14 20:08:28

My god wasn't he?! Up his own historical arse.

SqueeksAway Sat 01-Mar-14 20:09:28

OMG I've just realised why I'm single! *facepalm

cees Sat 01-Mar-14 20:09:42

I don't think she is on it to meet someone, she just wants to be on the telly. Surely she would try to get to know her dates rather then constantly yap at them the entire time, if she was serious then she would want to hear about their lives and be happy to let them speak.

physallis Sat 01-Mar-14 20:11:59

On the basis I do accents, pull faces (and speak in different languages during the same conversation, she's not done that so far, but give her time!) I'm starting to see why I'm single if it's all so horrifying to people...!

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