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To expect a 5 year old not to bite me.

(66 Posts)
Cravey Fri 28-Feb-14 12:06:14

A five year old dog yh I could accept. Wouldn't be happy of course but maybe understand. A five year old child though. Aibu in expecting his parent to at least tell him off. Not laugh and say oh he's so bad tempered. He bit my bloody hand so hard it drew blood and I think I might want a tetanus. I knew there was a reason I don't like children. This is one of them. Really though to be serious I'm not wrong to expect him to be disciplined am I ? Oh and the reason for the bite. Because he wanted a camera to play with. A four hundred pound camera that doesn't belong to me. I said no. He bit me. I should add I've known this little boy for all his life and I don't think he has any special needs. Although if he had I'm not saying he should be able to go round biting people. That's him struck off the xmas list.

Floggingmolly Fri 28-Feb-14 14:49:47

You've upset his wife by remaining unamused at being bitten by a feral 5 year old? hmm. Bin the whole mad lot of them.
If he does this at school and she trots out that line, they'll probably report her for neglectful parenting.

zzzzz Fri 28-Feb-14 14:54:08

<boggle> at the husband phoning your Dh. shock grin

My life is so boring. No one ever phones Dh and tells him to control his wife. sad

DidoTheDodo Fri 28-Feb-14 14:54:13

Cravey, I love your husband! He's a keeper!

Cravey Fri 28-Feb-14 15:09:08

I too love my hubby. I did tell him not to get any ideas. He's not managed to control me thus far so it isn't going to happen anytime soon. Lol. I shall be holding my head high in the bar don't fret.

MajorGrinch Fri 28-Feb-14 15:14:56

Top marks for restraint!!

At least you'll have an amusing tale for dinner parties now...

Good luck with the jabs!

ADishBestEatenCold Fri 28-Feb-14 15:26:40

Is it truly awful of me to ask, will you let us know what happens when you and she next meet?

Oh, and I hope the tetanus shot isn't too painful.

kentishgirl Fri 28-Feb-14 15:31:31

My God, knowing there were no special needs, I would have whacked the little git across the room. And thrown him and his parents out.

Understandable in 2 year olds (if then disciplined by parents). 5 year old? Mental parenting. Child who will probably end up in prison. Yay them.

Cravey Fri 28-Feb-14 15:32:48

I have a horrid feeling that we shall be meeting tonight. We have music in the bar. They always make a point of coming out when we have a live act on. I might ask one of the staff to bite her. Lol. Then say oh sorry she gets upset when we are busy. Or failing that ask her husband to control her.

DidoTheDodo Fri 28-Feb-14 15:33:54

Is it your bar? If so, you could ban her?

YouTheCat Fri 28-Feb-14 15:34:27

Is it your bar? Can you not just ban them for being utter arseholes?

DearTeddyRobinson Fri 28-Feb-14 15:41:04

A muzzle! Haha! Love your DH grin
What a little shit and what a stupid mother. She's in for some real problems

OwlinaTree Fri 28-Feb-14 15:46:49

Wonder what would have happened if child bit his mother? Would she be so forgiving then?

Chippednailvarnish Fri 28-Feb-14 15:50:34

You need to get a huge bandage and sling, and then tell everybody that you had to have stitches grin

Cravey Fri 28-Feb-14 15:51:00

It is indeed my bar. I'm not banning them. No way. They spend too much money on stupid cocktails. I will not however be saving them a seat as I usually do. They can bloody well sit at the back. Childish satisfaction. Oh and I had the jab. Bloody hell tetanus jabs hurt.

Chippednailvarnish Fri 28-Feb-14 16:02:51

Then add a limp because of your poor sore bum from the tetanus jab.

Cravey Fri 28-Feb-14 16:08:32

Chipped I'm swinging towards the bandage at the moment lol.

Cravey Fri 28-Feb-14 16:13:39

I'm also thinking of serving jugs of a new cocktail tonight. I'm sure I can whip one up. I may well call it the muzzle. Might even send them a free jug !

DidoTheDodo Fri 28-Feb-14 16:19:12

Cocktail names...

The Jaw Dropper
The Biting Pest
Never Darken my Door


Peekingduck Fri 28-Feb-14 16:21:33

Vampire Cocktail

WilsonFrickett Fri 28-Feb-14 16:26:21

What kind of band is it? I'm sure we could help with a playlist...

Skin Deep? Cuts like a knife?

WilsonFrickett Fri 28-Feb-14 16:26:55

Fangs for the memories???

EverythingsDozy Fri 28-Feb-14 17:26:22

Honestly?! I think you should pat yourself on the back for staying so calm! I am never one to tell off someone else's child but had a child bitten me so hard to draw blood and a tetanus injection to be necessary I don't think I'd have been able to control the crazy in me (towards child and parent!)
Love the cocktail names grin

KrevlornswathoftheDeathwokClan Fri 28-Feb-14 18:32:21


I would have gone mental because that is my reaction to pain, she is lucky it wasn't me!

BalloonSlayer Fri 28-Feb-14 18:38:32

If they come in, go up to them and have a tantrum and declare you want something expensive they have. Snarl a bit and get pulled away by one of your staff

Staff member could then explain that you were bitten by some sort of nasty zombie creature today and they are worried you are now turning into one yourself.

Blueandwhitelover Fri 28-Feb-14 19:45:20

just marking place because I'm dying to know what happens tonight! )and no, he shouldn't have bitten you!)

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