It depends on the type of incontinence surgery they are thinking of and who the surgeon is.
TVT or TOT can be done by gynae surgeon or urologist. The gynae may consider vaginal refashioning but I doubt a urologist would.
It's also a completely different procedure and unlikely to be funded on the NHS. Prolapse surgery is more likely to result in things tightening up and more likely to be under gynae, so if you need front or back repairs / sacrospinous hitch / tvt you're more likely to feel less loose post op.
If it's tvt you're less likely to get refashioning funded. You'd almost certainly have to have completed your family (because you don't want it all stretched out again!). However you won't know if you don't ask
After I posted, I realised my humour may have been a little insensitive, and apologise if I may have offended you. Its just something that me and dh joke about and as we can I know it doesn't bother him too much. He could just be being cautious, theres nothing more off putting or a bit restrictive than when they know we are experiencing trouble below. Good luck with the OP, hope all goes well x