My ex (mother of our 18mth son) is refusing to share in the responsibility of his travel to contact with me.
The facts are: -
We lived in London
January 13 she left and moved to SW England to live with her parents
After 6 months attempting to reconcile with her, I had no choice but to petition as it was clear she wanted no further part in a relationship and had committed to a life in SW England.
Throughout separation I wasnt working as Id taken an extended leave from work to be able to spend time with her and our son; however, the moment she left I began to pay 1k per month in terms of maintenance despite her living rent free at her parents house.
I have tried to request that she, reasonably, shares the responsibility of travel for contact (every other weekend).
She refuses; the distance is 130 miles and I drive for 10 hours every other weekend to collect my son for two nights in London and then return him.
She has income equal to earning 41k per annum which is provides her with a disposable income which is greater than mine (once I have paid support etc).
She has many friends remaining in London I would have thought the option to see them would have been appealing she only has no friends where she has moved to.
She has said that she will drive (when convenient to her so basically never) for 45p per mile which equates to 120 per return journey.
I have offered to pay her the AA fuel price for the journey of 32; she refused.
I increased this to 40 she refused.
I wrote requesting that I was being left little alternative and suggested that we go to mediation/arbitration she refused unless I paid for both of our costs in it.
I made a final offer of 50 per return journey and that she commits to sharing the travel equally with me; ie she either delivers him or collects him with me doing the opposite or we meet half way (I suggested somewhere 20 miles in her favour)
She refused so I had no alternative but to issue a specific issue application; I know this will cost me money but, the way I look at it is this, it costs me approximately 300 per month in petrol to see my son which equates to 3600 per year; I dont see that it is neither fair nor reasonable that someone can move so far away, taking a loving fathers son and then refuse to share in the driving of their son to contact with his father.
I would be interested to see what peoples thoughts are; the divorce is all done and all financial matters are settled; I pay full CSA monies, I pay spousal maintenance and I also contribute significantly in terms of clothing, footwear, food etc. As far as I am concerned the divorce is amicable and I try my very best to do what is in the uttermost best interests for our son.
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
Am I beling unreasonable?
8 replies
Foreverboris · 27/02/2014 12:09
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.