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To be anxious about getting married?

(5 Posts)
Choccywoccydoo Thu 27-Feb-14 08:52:04

Have lovely DP and happy relationship.

It's not that I think marriage would drastically change our day to day life, it's just the commitment of 'forever' that I find hard to grasp.

Also the thought of the actual wedding - standing up in front of all those people! I'd be happy with something small but DP has big family and would like our friends there. If I told him I'd be really unhappy with it I'm sure he'd give this up, but I don't want to, he's a wonderful guy and deserves the wedding he wants even more than I do (for numerous reasons, I've put him through an awful lot) And once I'd got over the nerves I'd probably be glad he'd been so keen on it.

Advice/thoughts? Anyone else been in a similar situation?

PumpkinPie2013 Thu 27-Feb-14 09:19:06

Hi, I think a lot of people feel anxious about getting married. It's a big commitment and imo shouldn't be taken lightly.

When I got married I was very aware of the important vows we were making in church and what it meant (I am religious so it was a full church ceremony but this would apply equally to a civil ceremony).

As for the wedding itself can you find a compromise with your dp? Maybe close friends and family for the ceremony and a quiet meal and then an evening party for everyone with a buffet?

I hope you have a lovely time when you decide to get married x

Choccywoccydoo Thu 27-Feb-14 15:06:48

Thanks pumpkin, it's good to know I'm not alone! Makes me nervous I wouldn't be making the right choice/with the right person

Suicidal5833 Thu 27-Feb-14 15:11:45

I was so nervous on the day I kept stuttering my words. And I was anxious in the run up I think it's normal.

BumpNGrind Thu 27-Feb-14 16:16:38

I wasn't nervous until the morning when I found myself being sick in the bathroom, and unable to walk. The second I started walking down the aisle (which I had absolutely dreaded), all of the nerves disappeared and it was amazing.

i never for a question questioned the long term commitment because that's exactly what we both wanted. Maybe if you are struggling with this you could go to counselling together almost as a health check before the wedding. If you are not sure then its not fair on either of you to go through with it. If its just nerves about the day itself, then they are completely normal and you'll have an amazing day.

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