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Feel left out of my online post natal group, AIBU or just too sensitive?

(7 Posts)
OnMyJones Wed 26-Feb-14 20:03:18

I joined the post natal thread when DC was born recently and I feel like I'm ignored and maybe disliked and I don't know why as I am not controversial or OTT. There are about 6-7 mums there who mostly all chat on the thread offering support and advice etc. But literally everything I ask or say is ignored.
It's a little upsetting as i thought it would be a nice way to talk to mums with similar aged babies, I will try and join some real life groups but nice convenient online group would have been nice.

DomesticDisgrace Wed 26-Feb-14 20:08:23

Oh same here, a really handy local group had a whatsapp group and I joined and felt really left out sad, I think it's just that they'd all been chatting for a while before I came along.

NewtRipley Wed 26-Feb-14 20:08:34

That sounds tough. Maybe you are being sensitive but most of us are a little tender when we've got a newborn

Not been on a postnatal thread, but I have namechanged before and people do tend to not acknowledge you at first until they get to "know" you

Do you name the person you are replying to in your posts, or just post without names? If it's the latter, maybe try using names so people are forced to reply to you by name.

chandlerbing Wed 26-Feb-14 20:21:47

I went on another website's mums due board when I had my youngest child, and it was the same. Very cliquey. And totally revolving around one or two members. What annoyed me too was that there were three Scottish members on there that constantly slagged off English people, even though most of us on there were English.

My advice would be to leave and to join other forums. There are lots of parenting FB groups, so might be worth checking some of those out.

JabberJabberJay Wed 26-Feb-14 20:25:05

I joined a FB Mums group after DC2 was born. It was quite cliquey but I enjoyed chatting with others with babies the same age. A couple of months ago I was removed from the group. Not sure why really as i was an uncontroversial and regular poster. It upset me more than it should have.

Then I thought 'fuck em'. Now if I want to chat about anything I come to MN instead.

Leave the group OP. Seriously. It is not worth this level of angst. They don't sound like very nice people.

OnMyJones Wed 26-Feb-14 20:48:13

I do name who I'm talking to at times yes, I.e. ......... Have you tried this or that, when they mention a problem. I didn't know there was Facebook groups, how would I find those?

fluffyraggies Wed 26-Feb-14 21:34:28

How long have you been in the group OP? And how long have the others been part of it?

i ask because i chat on a particular web site's forum and when i joined (2 years ago) i felt exactly as you do. i just kept reading and posting regularly, and in time became 'part of the group'. As time has passed most of the original members of the group have gradually fallen away, and now i'm one of what some might see as the next 'clique' of old timers who have been chatting to each other for 18 months or so. We see many 'newbies' come (its an open forum) and i make an effort to be welcoming. So many of them only post 2 or 3 times and then disappear. A few keep posting and just become a familiar 'face' and a natural part of the group. Just like in RL really. My advice is to stick with it for a bit.

Hope any of that ramble is a help!

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