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To think if you arent sure, you shouldnt ask....

(56 Posts)
Gwladgwlad Tue 25-Feb-14 15:31:47

Some stupid bloody woman in work asked me when the baby was due. I am not pregnant (have 6 yr old and 2 yr old) and am mortified.

I am a bit over my favourite weight and my tummy does stick out a bit! But FFS, would you ever ask?
Gutted! I was having a fat day too as can't seem to lose the last half a stone sad

prettybird Tue 25-Feb-14 15:35:15

I did that once to a friend of my overseas' family when we were visiting after a couple of years' gap. blushblush

I swear she looked 6 months at least gone blushblush

I now need confirmation from the mouth of the woman concerned or at a push her partner before ever commenting on a pregnancy blushblush

saulaboutme Tue 25-Feb-14 15:36:24

I've been asked and am afraid I'm guilty of asking once!
Woman I know was always saying she was trying for her 3rd DC.

CardiffUniversityNetballTeam Tue 25-Feb-14 15:38:25

I think an excellent rule of thumb in these situations is never to ask a woman if she is pregnant unless you can actually physically see a baby coming out of her. wink

workingtolive Tue 25-Feb-14 15:39:00

I have been asked too, I had a new top on at the time, felt wonderful, was shattered to a million pieces shortly after being asked how old my ds was (not a ds but a dd who looked a bit boyish) and when the next one was due.
conversely, when I was pregnant I didn't look it for ages!

DaleyBump Tue 25-Feb-14 15:40:31

Even if I could see the head coming out I would be scared to ask.

WorraLiberty Tue 25-Feb-14 15:42:02

I asked someone once when I was a teenager blush

The thing was, in my mind I was absolutely sure she was pregnant.

Lesson learned though. That was 30 years ago and I've never asked anyone since.

ArsePaste Tue 25-Feb-14 15:42:27

Better a pregnant lady standing, than a fat lass crying, as that well known "wit" Peter Kay once said. NEVER ask.

PeggyCarter Tue 25-Feb-14 15:42:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Goblinchild Tue 25-Feb-14 15:44:47

How would you solve the issue of shy pregnant women standing then?
Those that are too timid to ask for a seat, surrounded by those that are too embarrassed to ask if she wants one in case she's just fat? grin

I've done that...I just wanted to die on the spot, was not my finest moment. I will never ever say anything now unless I see someone in full blown labour!

BadgersRetreat Tue 25-Feb-14 15:45:36

I hadn't been there long when a woman at work showed me an ultrasound pic and said 'look, my baby' and i wished her congratulations, and said i didn't know she was expecting.

'i'm not, it's my grandchild'.... blush

I blame her for that - very misleading!! She looked about 40 but was in fact over 50 too.

Lambzig Tue 25-Feb-14 15:49:17

A young guy absolutely insisted I had his seat on the tube last week. Am trying to figure out if he thought I was pregnant or old. Not happy about either.

Pawprint Tue 25-Feb-14 15:50:24

Totally agree. My tummy was fat for ages after I had ds and looked like a bump sad At least 12 people asked me when my baby was due. I was mortified. Then I realised that it was partly the clothes I was wearing so went on a diet and bought some new clobber still look fat though

WorraLiberty Tue 25-Feb-14 15:50:54

OMG Badgers that's hilarious and so not your fault! grin

BadgersRetreat Tue 25-Feb-14 15:52:36

pfft thanks Worra

i was this colour for about 2 hours ---> angry

she did laugh, thank fuck.

Lottiedoubtie Tue 25-Feb-14 15:55:00

I got asked once I was blush but also vaguely confused as whilst I was overweight I definitely wasn't carrying it as a bump at the front!!

Well actually not asked, but told I shouldn't be moving a heavy table 'in my condition' which as probably worse... grin

AlpacaLypse Tue 25-Feb-14 15:58:09

I once did something far worse sad. When I was a teenager I ran into someone I knew who'd been expecting a baby which would have been due in about a month's time. Thoughtlessly I asked her where it was. It turned out to have been still born at six months.

It's left me with a lasting terror of asking anybody anything about pregnancy.

RiverTam Tue 25-Feb-14 16:00:35

my old hairdresser looked permanently 6 months gone - luckily I never asked but it was only after I'd seen her like this for about a year that I realised that it was just her tummy.

Scarletohello Tue 25-Feb-14 16:02:46

I have had this so many times! I'm an apple shape so although quite slim I have a bit of a tummy.

So, a few examples are;

One time I was walking down the street, minding my own business and smoking a fag. A homeless person shouted out, you shouldn't be smoking in your condition!

Been asked many times by strangers, when's it due?

Been offered seats on tube by people assuming I'm pregnant.

However the one that takes the biscuit is one when a few years ago I was with a group of friends travelling back to UK from France on an overnight ferry. We hadn't booked a cabin so I wanted to find out where the recliners were. I asked a cabin member who was French. He replied, oh no Madame, in your condition you shouldn't be sleeping in a recliner, I'll show you to the medical room! So he showed me to a private room with a bed in! My French wasn't good enough to explain, no I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. So I had a very restful night's wlee

Scarletohello Tue 25-Feb-14 16:04:29

*sleep on a comfy bed!

It used to upset me but I'm used to it now

But really wish people wouldn't make assumptions...

Goblinchild Tue 25-Feb-14 16:05:22

Badgers, that's an easy one to recover from though, just look astounded and say 'Grandchild? Surely not, you are far too young. Really? Wow, you look amazing!'
Then watch the happy smugness put a bounce in her step for the rest of the day.
Much worse to mistake a parent for a grandparent.

Scarletohello Tue 25-Feb-14 16:07:14

Arse that Peter Kay quote is sooo funny!

Corygal Tue 25-Feb-14 16:08:12

My stomach sticks out and when tired I go green, so people spend their lives asking me if I want a seat on the tube. It's superb because I have a bad back - I couldn't care less if anyone thinks I'm pregnant.

Ememem84 Tue 25-Feb-14 16:10:09

I was asked once. I'd taken great care that day choosing a really nice outfit for work which included a New grey pencil skirt. Turns out skirt was not very forgiving. Was congratulated. And then asked when I was due.

I corrected colleague. Threw skirt to back if wardrobe when I got home. Then hit the gym the next day to sort out stomach.

Can now wear skirt again.

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