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To think a lot of hcp are biased against borderline.

(9 Posts)
Suicidal5833 Sun 23-Feb-14 17:44:43

I have bipolar one and borderline. When I'm on a episode because of bipolar hcp are very nice and sympathetic. But when my borderline is playing up hcp are not as understanding I have been shouted at threatened with social services if I don't act different. Told that it's behavioural and therefore I must fix it and sent away with no help. I have been treated like I'm a manipulating attention seeking person who is lying about the severity of how ill she is. It is also blamed anytime I speak up I'm just being a bit borderline.

Aibu to think that having a borderline diagnosis is not a pleasant one to have largely because the attitude on a lot of hcp.

Meerka Sun 23-Feb-14 18:42:44

Agreed they are.

Im also going to put the other side that actually some people with BPD are really difficult to handle and very frustrating. But its one of the relatively few PD's that is treatable and there is often a good long-term prognosis so actually, if people persevere there's a good chance they will see positive changes in their clients / patients.

But it is a diagnosis with a lot of prejudice attached and that makes it all the harder for the person who is living their life with the intense ups and downs of this emotionally unstable disorder and with the sheer pain of it. It really doesn't help the person living with it or the people near them when health care professionals come with heavy duty prejudice attached.

iamsoannoyed Sun 23-Feb-14 19:56:51

Well, it's possible you are being treated unfairly- you should not be shouted at (even if your behaviour is poor). If this really is the case, I am surprised that a HCP would behave in this way towards you (especially if they work in mental health), and even more surprised that this been done by more than one HCP and has happened on multiple occasions. If so, you should complain about it, as it seems to be a systematic problem within the department you are treated by, and needs to be dealt with.

That said, are you sure that they have actually shouted at you and threatened you? As opposed to telling you frankly your behaviour/actions was unacceptable and that continuing to behave in this way would result in unpleasant consequences- such as a referral to social services?

However, from personal experience (as a HCP and as someone who has a cousin with BPD and a brother with narcissistic PD), some people with BPD are difficult to treat/be around and do display manipulative behaviour, which tends to cause others to react differently to them. I hate it when my relatives attempt to manipulate me, I tend to just back off and keep them at arms length.

Clearly, with patients you can't just distance yourself from them if you are on the receiving end of manipulative behaviour. However, I do make sure everything is done exactly by the book, and with witnesses if at all possible, if I think a patient is behaving in a manipulative manner. This is to protect myself.

Perhaps what you are perceiving as "unfair" treatment is a perfectly rational response to your behaviour? I understand that having this condition isn't your fault, and you probably aren't consciously displaying BPD behaviours- but that doesn't change the impact it has on others, nor their reaction to you.

Meerka Mon 24-Feb-14 09:17:10

btw, dialectical behaviour therapy is generally thought to be quite a good treatment, if you can find it.

SaucyJack Mon 24-Feb-14 09:34:27

Im also going to put the other side that actually some people with BPD are really difficult to handle and very frustrating.

some people with BPD are difficult to treat/be around and do display manipulative behaviour,

Oh the irony. Would either of you have bothered to point this out about any one single other mental illness or disorder?

YANBU OP. But I suggest you leave this thread before it starts.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 24-Feb-14 09:58:41

I agree with saucy Jack's comment and yes I DO have experience of bi polar as a good friend and family member have it and I've had help for mental health issues (been hospitalised)

Tbh it's the same with any illness, some HCP's are great, others are dire.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Mon 24-Feb-14 09:59:33

Sorry,I meant I agree with meerka .

Nomama Mon 24-Feb-14 15:37:56

iamsoannoyed - I understood what you meant and agree with the possibilities you present.

Having worked with and for adults with BPD I am certain that the same advice was seen as too blunt, uncaring, judgmental by many friends and family when I gave it.

I am also certain that many people are still so overly careful about causing offence that they accept such poor behaviours and forgive them, not realising that even people with BPD etc can be bad tempered, rude gobshites who need to learn how to judge the effect of their behaviours, just the same as the rest of us.

It is often really hard to point out what should be blindingly obvious without causing offence.

Suicidal Meerka and iamsoannoyed have both posted some good stuff to ponder. Have another read of both posts and see if it possible that your own irritation and feelings aren't preventing you from separating cause and reactions sometimes. It might help to identify which of your behaviours causes those of the HCP and, vice versa, which of the HCP behaviours cause your own. Knowing which is casue and which is effect can be a powerful tool to control.

Otherwise, yes, some HCPs can be offhand and rude too - just like everyone else.

fluffydressinggown Mon 24-Feb-14 15:56:39

I have a diagnosis of BPD and agree that there is still a lot of prejudice about it MH services.

I have been spoken to very unkindly when I have been feeling very low, which doesn't help things.

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