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To get wound up with my mums over used phrase

(33 Posts)
K8eee Sat 22-Feb-14 22:16:03

Dh and I dread one thing when we see my mum. Her use of the word 'really' for pretty much anything. I'm really sorry to swear but it does my fucking head in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's a one word response too. It's not used to say something is 'really great' or 'I really love that jacket'. It's the tone she says it in too. Sort of a whine; if dh or anyone makes a joke or says something that is meant to be slightly humorous, her answer is 'really?' I wish I could have a 'really' had for when we see her just so she could see how much she uses that 6 letter word!!!!!!!!!!

Probably doesn't help I'm 36 weeks pregnant too hmm

K999 Sat 22-Feb-14 22:17:39

She sounds really annoying

And really unsure of what it is she's really trying to say??

NoodleOodle Sat 22-Feb-14 22:18:28

Have you ever watched Miranda? She gets annoyed any time her mum says "what I call..."

It's normal, and funny YANBU.

ParsleyTheLioness Sat 22-Feb-14 22:19:08

Sounds passive agressive to me... YANBU

Finola1step Sat 22-Feb-14 22:21:09

Really? grin

Amy106 Sat 22-Feb-14 22:21:44

Congratulations on your pregnancy! Although that might have something to do with how you feel about this, I think it would be very annoying, pregnant or not. YANBU

thenightsky Sat 22-Feb-14 22:22:19

she probably does it without realising. DH says 'if you know you know what I mean' as a sort of break in his trail of conversation. It does my nut in as he says it so fast so it comes out as 'no-wh-a-mee' I've started challenging him by saying... do you think I'm not not understanding? Of course I know what you mean! If you think I don't, then please explain.

Can you do similar OP?

TheLostPelvicFloorOfPoosh Sat 22-Feb-14 22:22:37

I really think you're being really oversensitive.

K8eee Sat 22-Feb-14 22:24:38

K999 I think you're right! It's funny as since dh and I have lived together, I've lost a lot of her traits (which I'm thankful for!!!) just little ones like talking whilst other people are trying to watch tv/read, and she has an awful habit of trying to commentate or talk about what's going on in a programme at the important bits, really drives me insane! I can see my dad gets wound up with it too. She likes an audience, and to be looked at as funny. Dh and I were analysing it after Xmas as it seemed she was trying to drown her sorrows with alcohol on boxing day infront of all the family, and it's as though she has no confidence in herself and feels probably like she hasn't a lot to offer apart from her entertainment value (which in all honesty isn't funny) I know I must sound awful, and I should be grateful my mums around to support me, but as I've gotten older it's just one of those things you find in someone that really grinds on you confused

K8eee Sat 22-Feb-14 22:28:31

Thenightsky, she said tonight 'oh do I say it a lot?' A lot!?! It's every other bloody word!!! I think she'd get narked with me if I did say anything, or tried to throw it back at her as she would think I'm trying to make a joke of it. Apparently dh and I say 'like' a lot. I don't think we do, but even if we do, we don't pointless use it when someone is trying to explain something and reply with 'like...?' My dad on the other hand uses 'what's name' loads. Does my head in!!! His example is 'oh you know what's name on the end of that road where what's name shop is? You know where that cafe is?' Yep really bloody helpful!

K8eee Sat 22-Feb-14 22:29:05

Thanks finola wink

Waltonswatcher1 Sun 23-Feb-14 00:49:02

Is this a wind up op ?
Cos over use of these !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is really annoying to some people ;)
(Said light heartedly whilst knowing I am a highly irritating individual )

K8eee Sun 23-Feb-14 08:43:03

Sorry waltons, it's just one of those things that infuriates dh and I but no one else has noticed it grin it probably seems as though I'm over reacting but it's one of those things that you can't help but notice someone doing.

winterlace Sun 23-Feb-14 08:47:28

I understand as I'm like that with 'ok.'

In some contexts I think it's pretty rude to be honest. Not as in 'I'm getting a drink, do you want one?' 'Ok!' It's when it's used as a response to everything you say!

springykyrie Sun 23-Feb-14 08:55:16

YABU. give her a break! No wonder she has no confidence if you're nit-picking about something so small. It's not that bad (though you two bitching about her ain't so great tbh). Don't see her so much if she so easily gets on your nerves, poor woman.

livelablove Sun 23-Feb-14 09:04:37

Using really with a strong questioning tone as "they said what???", is a newish thing. Not sure if I like it. But if she uses it this way at least she is up to date.

likeneverbefore Sun 23-Feb-14 09:05:55

Well, if it helps.

My Mum refers to the Prime Minister as "Cam-a-RON" (with the emphasis on the last syllabble which she pronounces like the men's name Ron).

So you'll be having a conversation about politics or whatever and she repeatedly refers to him as Cam-a-RON. I've asked her why she does it - and she replies smugly" "Cam-a-RON" yes, that's how it's spelt. I am correct"

And I'm like but Mother, the enitre REST OF THE WORLD does not pronounce it like that.

I'd take really any day. REALLY!

paxtecum Sun 23-Feb-14 09:11:29

Fast forward 30 years and imagine your DCs talking about you - because they will however perfect you think you are.

likeneverbefore Sun 23-Feb-14 09:13:44

I don't mind if my DC talk about my annoying habits. I know I can be annoying grin

just not as annoying as my Mum

ProfPlumSpeaking Sun 23-Feb-14 09:13:44

"it's just one of those things that infuriates dh and I"

Incorrect use of the personal pronoun is just one of those things that infuriates I.

We all have our bugbears.

He, he, I assume this thread is lighthearted. Everyone has their own conversational tics. Concentrate on what is important - that you have a loving mother making an effort to support you.

Congrats on the pregnancy btw.

Poppyhat Sun 23-Feb-14 09:18:59

My mum uses the same word ,and it drives me mad,
She uses it when she doesn't understand what I have just said ,so because she doesn't have an appropriate response ,she says really !
Or she will say right ,in a drawn out manner ,riiiiggghhtt,as if she is pondering over what she's just been told !
Why not just say ,'I don't understand,could you explain it a bit more to me ?'
Instead , by using those words ,I know she hasn't understood,but doesn't want to go over it again ,which makes me feel like I wish I hadn't bothered in the first place .
And breathe :-)
You have hit a nerve there op ,

ThreeBeeOneGee Sun 23-Feb-14 09:23:17

I do this to my children when they do something particularly unwise or foolish. I just look at them, raise one eyebrow, sigh and then say "Really?".
It is actually shorthand for "I can't believe you just did that. I thought you knew better."

I find it effective and it saves energy compared to having a massive rant at them. I use it sparingly though (no more frequently than once a week).


DumSpiroSpero Sun 23-Feb-14 09:24:35

grin I think it's just a mum thing and you need to try and find a way to laugh to laugh through it, although it's bound to be more irritating if you're pg.

With my mum it's mispronounciation...T-MObeeel and Diabeetus being the two that most frequently press my buttons.

Not to mention starting every phone convo with...'I read something really interesting in the paper...'

No you didn't mum - you read the Daily Mail!

Toofattorun Sun 23-Feb-14 09:24:55


Toofattorun Sun 23-Feb-14 09:27:07

Does she sound like this, OP?

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