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Upset over tea party

(18 Posts)
doglover Fri 21-Feb-14 22:08:46

I think I am probably being unreasonable but just need to opportunity to vent! Four of my friends/colleagues met today - just seen the photos on the dreaded FB - for tea and cakes. I've been really supportive of one (off with stress) and another who was faced with workplace bullying issues.
Seeing the pictures was upsetting. There was no particular reason for me to be invited but I would have expected to have been there. I suppose it's that feeling of being excluded - albeit unwittingly, I'm sure.

Sorry. Rant over.

BrokenToeOuch Fri 21-Feb-14 22:11:44

YAB very sensitive! They also probably have other friends who weren't invited too, you weren't 'excluded', more like just not invited.

SantanaLopez Fri 21-Feb-14 22:12:49

Oh, it's rotten when that happens. I know its far to easy to say forget it, but honestly, it's the best thing to do.

Wigglebummunch Fri 21-Feb-14 22:28:43

Yanbu that is a shit thing to do.

CoffeeTea103 Fri 21-Feb-14 22:32:50

I always think when these situations happen it always comes down to one thing, you see yourself as a friend to them in a very different way that they see you.

Scholes34 Fri 21-Feb-14 22:34:17

Occupational hazard of being on Facebook.

complexnumber Fri 21-Feb-14 22:34:45


wol1968 Fri 21-Feb-14 22:35:07

If the workplace bullying was backstabbing among frenemies, you're probably better off not invited to the tea party. Be supportive if you must, but stay detached because offering emotional support does not necessarily mean a close friendship. You don't really know these people, or the politics they're working with.

doglover Fri 21-Feb-14 22:36:51

Thanks for the responses. Advice taken!

Innogen Fri 21-Feb-14 23:11:18

Google 'dealing with fomo' - fear of missing out.

I got over this last year and it has been liberating, and my friendships have improved greatly.

feathermucker Fri 21-Feb-14 23:38:34

I struggle badly with this sort of thing and always have done. its really not worth the worrying energy wink

Will Google the fomo

moominmarvellous Sat 22-Feb-14 00:28:59

Sounds like a storm in a teacup.......

(Sorry, I had to do it!)

Amy106 Sat 22-Feb-14 01:29:40

YANBU. That would have hurt me too.

kerala Sat 22-Feb-14 12:16:47

Yanbu had this only last week and had that awful sinking rejection sick feeling. We had unexpected child free night so texted our group only to find 4 out of 6 of them were going out anyway and we were nfi. They said it was because the men in the group were doing an activity that the rest of us aren't involved in. Dh and I went for dinner just us as didn't want to go despite them asking us. Then they all started texting saying we were being daft and should meet up which we did. Still feel abit sad though so sympathies here

Nomama Sat 22-Feb-14 12:38:47

NU - but send them a happy message and then try very hard to make the happy message what you really feel.

In all probability they didn't make an invitation list, they just sort of got together. Not worth getting upset over....

doglover Sat 22-Feb-14 21:43:01

Will google fomo.

OldBagWantsNewBag Sat 22-Feb-14 21:52:43

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Greenmug Sat 22-Feb-14 21:58:13

Its horrible when this happens but you dont really know the circumstances. I have a (now ex),friend who used to arrange things with different people and at any one time somebody was always made to feel left out because she would do all the arranging and inviting. Perhaps a similar situation here?

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