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what is it about people that annoys others?

(58 Posts)
pamelat Thu 20-Feb-14 21:24:09

What attributes annoy you in people?

As im getting on, im realising that I dont have that many friends!!

I have a few close friends, mummy ones, a couple of cousins but they dont have much choice ;) and one school friend. Others seem to have life long networks of close friends.

I think I was rubbish at maintaining friendships at 16/17 when I got my first boyfriend, he was an idiot, very possessive etc.

Now im sad that I lost those friends, its a long time ago but by the delight of facebook, I see that those friends meet up etc and im almost envious!!

More recently, in group situations, school playground, work courses, I find that I make an effort to chat but that no one is very interessted.

Im almost paranoid now. I habe asked my old school friend what it is about me (!!) And shes I credibly honest but says there is nothing.

Dh says im too self absorbed so perhaps just notice it nore. I dont think that I am self absorbed, but am aware of most things around me. Is that self absorbed thougb?!!!

ISeeYouShiverWithAntici Thu 20-Feb-14 21:42:00

People who only want to talk about themselves
ignorant people
people with no sense of humour are dull to be around but dont annoy me.

Hotmad Thu 20-Feb-14 21:48:24

Narcissistic people and people who park in p&c bays when they shouldn't

pamelat Thu 20-Feb-14 21:49:09

Im none of those ;)
I find that I like most people.

I think its hard to be interesting though, for me and most people?! Harder stikl since being a mum

Life gets a bit small on you

Madeyemoodysmum Thu 20-Feb-14 21:49:18

People with no regard for the happiness of others annoy me

This can be flakiness, cancelling at the last minute or strangers behaviour , talking in cinemas, letting kids run riot in cafés, general bad manners.

I'm sure this kind of behaviour is getting worse.

drnoitall Thu 20-Feb-14 21:51:20

People who talk about themselves the majority of the time.
People who talk about their children all the time.
People who talk one day and ignore me the next.
People who over look me based on me being a sahm with 5 children.

pamelat Thu 20-Feb-14 21:55:45

I dont like competitive parenting which seems to be eveerywhere.

I think its harmful for parents and children.

I dont like rudeness. I have an acquaintance who will talk to you but actively look around for other people and talk over you! Its not just to me or I wold get concerned ;)

KeepCalmAndLOLKittens Thu 20-Feb-14 22:00:42

I think that there a couple of things about me that annoy people.

For one thing I'm quite reserved in the sense that I don't have much small talk and sometimes say the wrong thing.

But I think most 'annoying' trait is voicing opinions, which I do face to face and on FB blush. Don't get me wrong, I have generally liberal views and don't think much of what I say offends, but I get the feeling that some think I'm up myself, and that others don't like to hear opinionated women's views hmm. This observation stems from FB - male friends who share similar views don't seem to ruffle too many feathers.

Maybe I'm just a contradictory sort of person.

I do think that people who never annoy are probably a bit bland and maybe say 'hun' a lot

Hotmad Thu 20-Feb-14 22:01:30

I notice the same things as you OP, about people just not being interested. I think people are just too busy in their lives to give time to meet new people, this is unfortunate but I think that it's the way it is a lot nowadays. I however like to meet and talk to new people. Maybe if you have time and all the rest of it you could do a evening college course or take up some sort of exercise class? I met 2 good friends through a kick boxing class and when I studied at university in my late 20's

BabyMummy29 Thu 20-Feb-14 22:04:08

I hate inverted snobbery.

Also people who judge others when they know nothing about them or their situation.

TheReluctantCountess Thu 20-Feb-14 22:06:11

Me. I annoy people.

mummyto2boysandagirl3 Thu 20-Feb-14 22:10:18

I know how u feel iv got no friends now lost all my friends from school and work sad.

I think when ppl maybe don't seem interested it's more they've already got their little group of friends and I just don't fit rather than there being something specific that they don't like about me. Could that b true for u? I haven't plucked up the courage to ask anyone yet but I do think it's a combination of that and I'm boring smile
(Sahm so really only have the dc to talk about as I don't have any hobbies or me time etc)

FoxesRevenge Thu 20-Feb-14 22:10:41

Know it alls
Cocky people
People who talk ALL the time about themselves
People who constantly have drama in their lives
People who walk along the street texting. Gormless gits.
Nosey fuckers

TitsalinaBumSquash Thu 20-Feb-14 22:16:19

I'm quite miserable easy to irritate, but my top five things I did like about people are;

1. Fake ditziness (the 'gosh I'm soooo silly and ditzy' thing some women do for attention)

2. 'Laddish' behaviour (if you talk about 'the boys' a lot then no)

3. Arrogance (you're not better than anyone, stop acting like it!)

4. Snobbishness (don't look down your nose at me because I'm young)

5. Cliquish behaviour (grow up, you're not in school now)

FudgefaceMcZ Thu 20-Feb-14 22:17:25

Constantly trying to start conversations when someone is trying to do something else. Gabbing on all the fecking time. Not actually listening properly to what the other person says.

Being pushy or up themselves- unless as a response to being unrecognised/unheard, which it usually isn't, it's usually posh people who do this.

Ignoring friends who aren't 'useful' to you. Failing to recognise friends' major life changes. Not keeping up with basic information about friends' lives e.g. when I got new job a bunch of people I was discussing something completely different with made it very clear that even though I had told them in person and posted it on Facebook, they had no idea what my job was, how long I had been applying for jobs, etc etc. If you can't keep up with all of the people who are your friends, you need to stop pretending to be friends with them, because it's just a waste of their time and energy. Generally 'popular' people annoy me because they are usually very shallow and only know you superficially but expect you to pay homage to them in return for their occasional conversation- no one is that important!

Crowler Thu 20-Feb-14 22:21:20

People who talk only about themselves.

People who refer to freely to their money, accomplishments, claims to greatness.

People who drink too much.

Crowler Thu 20-Feb-14 22:22:27

Laddish behavior is really bad. I live equidistant between Chelsea and Fulham stadiums. I loathe game days.

drnoitall Thu 20-Feb-14 22:23:12

Fudge.... You must know my sister !!!

pamelat Thu 20-Feb-14 22:26:36

I think I am a bit boring, unless I drink a lot, perhaps twice a year!! Then im ridiculous!!

I used to be very shy. Now some people think im quiet, even though I think I talk as much as them!!!

I like quiet people anyway, as long as people try to interact. Life is cruel enough without school girl type bitchiness.

For some reason, im told that people think I come over as a bit too nice.

Dh would disagree!!!!

Youre probably right, peoples lives are busy. It would sometimes to be good to get anonhmous feedback!!

One ex mummy friend told another that she didnt want to see me for the following reasons; I stilll used a buggy for ds (then just turned 3, busy school run), went out too much (maybe every 6 weeks), always wanted to be doing (I find it hard to stay in with dc as they drive me crazy in all day) and that my dh helped too mcuh!! He cooks our tea. Bizarre.

VulvaBeaker Thu 20-Feb-14 22:27:57

People who would rather be wrong with everybody else, than right and on the outside.

Idiots who think they are clever and try to lord it over others.

Not-really-scientist scientists who archly repeat stupid and wrong things they don't understand to other people in a patronising tone. Would cheerfully chip in for those people to be sucked up with a giant hoover and the bag launched into space and smashed into the surface of Titan.

LessMissAbs Thu 20-Feb-14 22:30:17

- Fake people.
- People who boast about how rich they are.
- Inverted snobbery.
- People who try to tell you what to do, outwith an employment context, particularly when they are more stupid than yourself.
- Closed-mindedness.

Adeleh Thu 20-Feb-14 22:32:09

People who don't pull their weight or do their fair share.

SleepSleepSleepSleep Thu 20-Feb-14 22:34:44

Constantly trying to start conversations when someone is trying to do something else. Gabbing on all the fecking time

fudge I am guilty of this!! But I DO listen too and it is hard when you are a chatterbox to stop sometimes. One of my friends is naturally quiet and she says she likes me to talk a lot!

Not much annoys me about others apart from lack of a sense of humour. Most other faults I can put up with (obviously excluding people who are totally insane, psychotic etc, we are talking about minor faults here)

To the OP I think there is nothing wrong with you - you just haven't met the right people who you fit in with. As others have said, try evening classes. take up a hobby/sport etc. Get a dog perhaps, I don't have one but am told it is a great way of meeting others.

alemci Thu 20-Feb-14 22:40:05

yes the people who talk about themselves but make no effort to ask you about things. people who complain in public and are rude to restaurant or shop staff etc.

zeezeek Thu 20-Feb-14 22:41:03

Oh God this is my dream thread because everyone is irritating me at the moment...but I'll try and narrow it down...

1. All politicians
2. People who are supposedly grown up (ie over 30) who act like teenagers
3. People who don't listen to other people
4. People who fail to see that there can be more than one POV and that the person who disagrees with you is actually allowed to hold that opinion without being insulted (a particular irritation in my line of work)
5. Entitled parents
6. Other entitled people
7. Including those who make a fuss of p&c parking spaces (I mean life's too short)
8. The national press, especially when they are writing utter nonsense about the NHS/research/academia/public sector
9. People who fail to understand that small children sometimes make a noise.....

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