My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

AIBU to be a bit surprised that grown ups really care about Valentine's Day?

59 replies

TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals · 14/02/2014 13:54

Just look at all the threads! If it is really important to you that your DH is romantic and vice versa, shouldn't it be all year round?

We aren't what I'd call romantic but a couple of times a year I get flowers from DH or I take him out for dinner etc. I just don't understand why it has to be on a set day?

It was important to me when I was 16 and undoubtedly NOT getting a valentines card from anyone though. I'm not entirely sure when it changed but I'd reckon by 18 I was over it.

OP posts:
Report
OuterFromOutersville · 14/02/2014 14:06

It is strange, isn't it? But if it makes companies money people happy, then maybe that's okay.

DH and I will have a takeaway, but more because we really want a takeaway Grin.

I feel awkward when people ask about Valentines day plans, it's like they're asking about your live life. Or making you think about theirs when they tell you about theirs. I DO NOT WANT TO KNOW THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE CALENDER SPECIFIED SEX.

Report
ephemeralfairy · 14/02/2014 14:13

CALENDER SPECIFIED SEX brilliant Grin

I dunno, I don't 'get' Valentines Day hoopla but then I make a big fuss about adult birthdays which is apparently not the done thing either.

Christmas on the other hand can go take a running jump as far as I'm concerned. I never enjoy it and TBH I find it weird that childless adults make a big deal of it. But y'know, each to their own.

Report
olidusUrsus · 14/02/2014 14:14

I don't mind it, but I have been a little bit eyebrow-raised-ey at the amount of women swooning because their DH cleaned the house as a valentine's treat...

Report
BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 14/02/2014 14:16

That is brilliant! Grin

I'm with you, I dont get it. Its nice and all, but just Confused at the whole thing

Nice to see Mn arent in on it too though, with special loved up smilies...
Report
HoneyDragon · 14/02/2014 14:17

I started a thread. I'm outraged at the fact the wirld hadn't stopped to pay homage to me.

Report
TheListingAttic · 14/02/2014 14:17

It's a good excuse to go out for dinner! Although we never do that on Valentine's Day itself, as everywhere is just busy and more expensive. And can't be arsed with whole heart-covered card/flowers/performance of exaggerated romance nonsense though.

I got a Valentine's text from DH. It had a heart and a picture of Cthulu.

Report
Grennie · 14/02/2014 14:20

I love birthdays and Christmas. Valentine's Day though I do see for teenagers. I don't understand it either.

Report
elQuintoConyo · 14/02/2014 14:21

Yabu to give a shit what other adults do.

Yabu to start a thread about it.

Some people celebrate Valentines Day - is it really any skin off your nose?

Blimey, op, someone shit in your Black Magic?

Report
Pigeonhouse · 14/02/2014 14:22

Well, I'm in a happy long term relationship, and we are abroad visiting friends, another couple who are visibly happy and have been together a long time, and none of the four of us remembered anything about it until we were sitting in a restaurant having lunch, and there was some disgusting-sounding St Valentine's peach Melba crepe special.

God knows, I have no issue with love and romance being celebrated, but when I think of romantic love, it's not usually outsize cuddly toys holding stuffed hearts or neon-pink cards with IOUs for a blow job that leap to mind.

Report
TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals · 14/02/2014 14:45

Wow Quinto do be a love and choke on a thorney rose.

Glad I'm not the only one! I am a bit of a sap and do like a good bit of romance, especially the courting ones in the office getting flowers and surprise weekends etc. I think that's how it should be, especially in the early days.

I do also agree about the having sex on a day because you should

OP posts:
Report
specialsubject · 14/02/2014 14:48

we go for a curry, but it's got too fashionable so will wait a day or so.

no cards or furry crap though, we are adults.

Report
chocoluvva · 14/02/2014 14:53

What happened to the tradition of sending a card to your would-be GF or BF?

What a rubbish day to go out for a meal - when the restaurants are at their busiest!

As DH and I have a joint bank account, I'd be cross if he wasted our money on half-dead roses or suchlike rubbish accoutrements.

Report
McFox · 14/02/2014 14:54

I couldn't give a shit, but am Shock at the person on my fb who has given their wife a flippin BMW as a valentine's present! WTAF is that all about?!

Report
Chocotrekkie · 14/02/2014 14:55

I'm making him a cake - valentines day is the best excuse I've had in weeks to make cake and then eat it.

I like cake...

Report
fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 14/02/2014 14:57

Olidus..exactly..I clean the house every day.

Report
lottieandmia · 14/02/2014 14:57

YANBU. Increasingly it seems to be a kids thing. My dd asked me if I could make her some 'valentines cakes' this morning!

Report
MrsWolowitz · 14/02/2014 15:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals · 14/02/2014 15:00

A BMW you say... now I could be converted!

OP posts:
Report
Kendodd · 14/02/2014 15:06

Oh don't be so 'bah humbug' personally I'll celebrate anything.

I saw an old man (I would guess 70) coming out of the supermarket today with a small bunch of red roses. It really made me smile because I imagined him taking them home to his wife of 40+ years. Who wouldn't want that?

(Please don't come along and burst my bubble, saying he's taking them to his young lover).

Report
tiredbutstillsmiling · 14/02/2014 15:07

DH & I have been together 8 years and have never celebrated Valentine's Day, out friends think we're weird! The way I see it we're quite romantic all year around, I don't need cards & flowers to prove that. Anyone who knows me knows how little I value cards & the only cards I have ever kept are my wedding ones and when DD was born (but that's more to do with people thinking I'm a bad wife/mother if I throw them away!). I'm not very sentimental.

I don't begrudge other people celebrating it - just respect my decision to have a heart of stone! :-)

Report
popcornpaws · 14/02/2014 15:14

I think its a load of old tosh.
Ive been married "forever" and my dh has surprised me over the years with city breaks on my birthday, a diamond ring on our anniversary, flowers and chocs just because etc.
He was told many years ago that i'd divorce him if he gave me any valentine shite… Its for teenagers ffs!!!

Report
WhisperingShadow · 14/02/2014 15:14

Been with DH 9 years. Celebrated it for the first time this year. Something made me realise that you only have one life, enjoy it. Doesn't have to be comercial crap, but it does remind those with busy lives and little free time to refocus. It could all be gone in an instant, so why turn your nose up at something that is fun?

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

womblesofwestminster · 14/02/2014 15:15

Life is too busy day to day with 2 small DC that yes, I'm afraid to say, it takes something like valentines day to make DH and I stop and make a proper effort to be a couple sans kids.

Report
CogitoErgoSometimes · 14/02/2014 15:19

YABU to feign surprise. If the calendar didn't have these kinds of events every so often... Valentines, Hallowe'en, St Patricks Day... it would be a dreary old year. At the end of the winter when everyone's been cooped up together snarling at each other for several dark, chilly and soggy months, I think a lot of people like the prompt to do something a bit daft.

Report
Dahlen · 14/02/2014 15:23

Most people are a sucker for marketing, so I'm not surprised.

Valentine's Day has been very aggressively marketed over the last 20 years, with the message loud and clear that you are an unromantic tight-fisted skinflint who clearly cares not a jot for your so-called loved one if you don't at least buy a piece of mass-produced card for a fiver and a bunch of half-dead roses for twice as much as you'd pay at any other type of year, but preferably please can you go the whole shebang and show you really care by arranging an expensive meal out and buying lots of sentimental tat. Oh and BTW you can treat each other like shit for the rest of the year, but as long as you do Valentine's Day right and remember birthdays, Christmas and anniversaries and spend lots of money on all of them, all will be forgiven.

Can you tell I don't do Valentine's Day? Grin

But seriously, the point of the above is that it capitalises on guilt and the fear of being rejected or causing someone else to feel rejected, which is a very powerful driver.

Despite not celebrating it myself though, if other people choose to good luck to them I say. After all, I'm a sucker for Christmas and that's a massively commercially exploited affair too.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.