To be bemused by the phrase 'young mothers'?

[ComposHat]

It sounds rather archaic, but I've still heard it used on here from time to time. However never been sure if it refers to

A) Women who had children at an early age

Or

B) Women with very young children.

Can anyone help?

[weeblueberry]

I always assumed A..

[Bunbaker]

To me it means young women who are mothers.

[SummersDumbAsPie]

In the context I've seen it used, it seems to mean "mother who is younger than me and therefore an open target for my judgements and bitching about what they do and how they parent".

[Pipbin]

Younger women who are mothers.

[TheNightIsDark]

A. Usually used in a derogatory manner.

I fucking hate it. It's the polite way IMO of saying teenage/chav parent and it's always used on here as "there was a young mother giving her baby a fruit shoot" or "I know a lot of young mothers who have DCs called that"

Sorry it bugs me. People seem to use it to excuse crap parenting. If someone said old parent then they would be flamed.

Yes, I am/was a 'young' parent

[Bunbaker]

I don't think of it as derogatory at all. I wasn't a young mother - not through choice I might add.

[NinjaBunny]

C) Women you're determined to patronise.

[Jollyphonics]

My mental definition of a young mother is someone who had their first child in their late teens or early 20s. I never use the phrase myself, but that's what I imagine people mean when they refer to someone as a young mother.

[PrincessOfChina]

I don't even know what it means. I was told by a group of colleagues today that I'm a young mother. I'm 33 and DD is 3.

[trashcanjunkie]

Love it! so true. I was a young mother - ds 1 at 18. I want to know what I am now? (ds1 17/ dts 9) me - 36...

[Dollslikeyouandme]

Switch it to 'old' mother.

Of course the term young mother is derogatory, patronising, makes me bloody cringe just thinking about it.

[takingthathometomomma]

I tend to use the term a lot to describe myself as saying "teen mum" conjures up all sorts of stereotypes. I have recently come to realise that "young" does the same though. If you look at a lot of newspaper articles, "young mum" is always used if there has been any sort of bad situation, even if the mother is 28. Like other posters have said, it's a sly way of saying "chav".

[MonsterMunchMe]

A.

With a bucket load of smug patronising that follows.

I feel like walking around with a sign on my back whenever I go out in public with my 6yr old DS.

It will say:

I'm 24 although I look 17
Don't be jel be reem
I've never claimed a benefit in my life
And I'm not trying to be your husbands second wife
You barely see me as I work full time and have joint custody
Not because I'm out on the P ........ iss

I've actually said this before to someone though not in such a polite rhyming manor.

Bitter much, what me?

[Dollslikeyouandme]

I always think applying some before 'mother' infers 'too' young, 'too' old, not young or older mother.

Why the fuck can't you just be a women, a mother?

[ComposHat]

It always seemed to be quite a condescending phrase. I just wasn't sure who people were being snooty about. Ta!

Sort of like common law wife / husband with heavy emphasis on the common. I thought that phrase had died a death until I saw it on this board.

[ethelb]

Its a way of justfying not having your first until you were 38

[AgaPanthers]

It means 'probably on benefits'.

[AwfulMaureen]

It's derogatory merely by it's existence. A mother is a mother. If you need to add something about the Mother's age, then add the actual age and not the word "Young"...the only circumstances in which I can see a Mother's age being relevant would be medical or official circumstances or discussion of forthcoming Birthday celebrations!

[AwfulMaureen]

ethelb I don't think what you just said is any better or nicer than those who use the term "Young Mothers" actually. There is no need to justify having DC at 38!

[ScrambledSmegs]

It's insulting and judgmental. Said by people who think that you shouldn't have a child until you are married, own your own home and have squillions in the bank, and are at least 30.

Problem is, as soon as you ARE 30 and pregnant the very same people tell you that you are too old and you will be dead before your children are teenagers. Can't win.

[JazzAnnNonMouse]

It's often used in a judgemental way.

Or a way to excuse/explain bad parenting practice.

If people used 'old mother' across the boards they'd be age discrimination posts in droves.

Mothers are mothers.

[Sharaluck]

Both but probably more B.

For A I would be more likely to use the phrase 'teen mothers'.

[Mumoftwoyoungkids]

I think B is more "new mother" than young.

Am I the only one who would love to be described as a young mother? (Rather than an old knackered one?)

[SPsMrLoverManSHABBA]

Young mum is used as people have described.

[NinjaCow]

A. I have found it to be used patronisingly (against me) but have used it to describe myself sometimes too iyswim. So can be derogatory but not always.