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To not want my cats now the baby's here?

(375 Posts)
elliebe13 Thu 13-Feb-14 11:37:02

2 years ago I really wanted a baby but my husband thought it was too soon so got me a cat instead. She's the gentlest, sweetest cat there is. A year later my friend found a box of abandoned kittens and we took one in. I put all my effort into her and lavished love on her but she's just a grumpy, horrible cat who steals my other cat's food, fights with her and leaves white hair everywhere. She doesn't even like to be stroked. Sometimes she just poops next to the litterbox.

I became really freakish about cleanliness during pregnancy and they're banned from our bedroom and the baby's room. They're both treated for fleas but I still find them on my baby's face occasionally.

I thought my hatred for them would disappear when the baby came but I just really resent them, no matter how much I clean there's hair and dander everywhere, we don't have much space or money really and it's hard to find a decent rented flat for pets.

The second cat needs to go as I am miserable and dreading when the baby starts crawling. I had guests over last night and my friend's coat was just covered with this white hair.

I am going out of my mind. I thought I was an animal lover but I guess I'm not sad

yoshipoppet Thu 13-Feb-14 11:39:48

If you hate them then you should definitely rehome them.

onetiredmummy Thu 13-Feb-14 11:39:55

Is it just the second cat you would rather not have or both of them?

elliebe13 Thu 13-Feb-14 11:41:04

Definitely can't stand the second one. The first one I still love, she's so sweet but still hate having litterbox and fleas sad don't kow what to do

HarpyFishwifeTwat Thu 13-Feb-14 11:42:02

This isn't going to end well. Not sure what you want to be told - animal shelters are struggling to cope with unwanted pets but worth contacting local places for advice. Please, please don't offer the cats free to people you don't know.

Best just stick to the one baby though. A second one might make you want to throw out your first.

ComposHat Thu 13-Feb-14 11:42:58

I think ypu are being ott.

Monthly flea treatment and a covered litter tray. If ghey are indoor-outdoor cars get rid of the litter tray.

AngryFeet Thu 13-Feb-14 11:43:29

I think you need to ease up on the obsessive cleanliness to be honest! Kids love dirt and mess and you will pass your obsessions on to them. Not good.

DanceParty Thu 13-Feb-14 11:43:35

Find them a home where they will get love, not hated for being second-best now the baby is here. Do them the best favour of their lives hmm

WaffilyVersatile Thu 13-Feb-14 11:43:58

I thought long and hard about whether we should have a dog. In the end we got one when my oldest was 6 and youngest was 2. It has been great.. 6 years on and now I am pregnant and similar to yourself I am not loving dog hair getting everywhere etc etc

Bottom line though is our dog is part of our family. She is going nowhere - an animal is for life and I am not a fan of irresponsible owners and rehoming centres full of unwanted pets.

Joolsy Thu 13-Feb-14 11:44:03

YANBU to not want the 2nd one however I think you'll change your mind about the 1st one - we've had cats since my DDs were babies & they absolutely adore them & we'd never be without them - they are true friends to the DDs. But yes it can be alot more work that you could do without when you have a baby too.

SoupDragon Thu 13-Feb-14 11:44:31

Change your flea treatment for a start.

Thisismyfirsttime Thu 13-Feb-14 11:44:32

You're not treating your flea problem properly if you're finding fleas on your baby's face after de-fleaing both animals!
Did you hate them before you were pregnant?

ifyourehoppyandyouknowit Thu 13-Feb-14 11:44:48

You need to treat your house for fleas, not just the cat.

If you don't like the second cat, re-home it. Otherwise you're looking at at least another 10 years of hating the cat. Can you get a cat flap so that you don't need a litterbox?

TheProsAndConsOfHitchhiking Thu 13-Feb-14 11:45:17

Those poor cats. Please find them a home where they will be loved and cared for properly sad

Lovecat Thu 13-Feb-14 11:45:30

You need some decent flea control - frontline is rubbish, most fleas seem to be immune to it nowadays. Advocate is far better, I treated our cats at the start of the winter and they are still flea free. Plus a good, proper flea spray to get rid of the ones that have jumped off in the house, especially around the skirting boards etc. 24 hours and you'll be flea free. The hair... that's just cats, I'm afraid.

Can you keep the litterbox somewhere your DD can't crawl to? It would be better for the cats too if they have a safe place they can retreat to when she starts getting interested in them <voice of experience>

I was coming on to say YABtotallyU, but given how much you hate the rescue cat, you might be doing it a favour rehoming it.

And anyone else reading this & thinking of getting a pet instead of a baby, please think on...

UriGeller Thu 13-Feb-14 11:46:08

Oh dear, I really hated my cat when the babies were new. I banished him to the shed for months when I found him asleep in the baby's car seat!. I couldn't tolerate him. I suppose my inner protective lioness had kicked in and I didn't want him in my gang.

Now they are a bit older (dd is crawling) I'm so glad we didn't get rid of him. He's teaching the kids how to be gentle and patient with smaller creatures (a very important thing to learn!) and ds (3) loves to feed him his biscuits.

I've go much more relaxed about fur and muddy paw prints since dd started crawling about and can often be found eating floor stuff anyway. They honestly adore the cat and I couldn't take their friend away now, just for the sake of having a slightly cleaner house.

BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack Thu 13-Feb-14 11:46:09

You will not come of well on this.

Yes, get rid of them, they deserve a decent owner not one who hates them!!

What will you do if your second baby comes along and is a bit wild and poops out of it's nappy.....maybe re-home them and get a big dog instead....till that pisses you off too.

patienceisvirtuous Thu 13-Feb-14 11:46:31

Can't stand people who want rid of their pets once they've had a baby.

Triliteral Thu 13-Feb-14 11:47:14

With regard to the fleas, have you tried Frontline? I have found it to be quite effective if used religiously. If you are finding them on the baby's face, the place must be seriously over-run with the little horrors (you have my sympathy, they're really unpleasant).

If you get a chance to rehome them, then I would take it, but as others have said, it can be quite difficult. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

elliebe13 Thu 13-Feb-14 11:50:00

We use advantage on them. I guess the hard part is it's a REALLY small 2 bed flat. Can't install cat flap as it's a rental plus loads of other cats in the area.

I know I'm being horrible, I hate myself for feeling like this but I just do.

MatryoshkaDoll Thu 13-Feb-14 11:50:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TalkieToaster Thu 13-Feb-14 11:50:07

Rehome the rescue cat. Ease up on your cleanliness standards or you'll drive yourself insane.

Did you know that children who grow up with an animal like a dog or a cat are less likely to develop asthma symptoms? Maybe that helps you to see that normal, animal 'mess' like the occasional bit of fur isn't a bad thing?

ZombiesAreClammyDodgers Thu 13-Feb-14 11:51:26

What harpyfishwife said. ^^

ChrisMooseMickey Thu 13-Feb-14 11:52:10

You need to de-flea your entire house.

And an animal is for life. But it sounds like you'd be doing the cats a favour if you rehome them

Vida Thu 13-Feb-14 11:52:15

Difficult to find a rented flat with pets? Hair everywhere? Surely you should have thought of that before getting them? And then to get another one? How terribly irresponsible.

Really, I have a very low tolerance for people who get pets then don't want them for stupid reasons. Selfish, shallow and uncaring deep down.

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