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To want to know where my son is

(13 Posts)
Anydrinkwilldo Tue 11-Feb-14 15:36:36

Fully prepared to be told IABU but need to know. Mil has taken ds1 (2yo) while I get some time to rest etc with ds2 (2wo). I didn't ask she just arrives to take him but that's for a different thread! So just saw on fb that sil has actually taken him out for the day without saying anything to me. AIBU to want to know where and who he's with or am I being controlling?

mindthegap01 Tue 11-Feb-14 15:44:40

I'm sure she did it to be helpful and give you a break but of course she should have agreed it with you first and told you where she was taking him - YANBU.

WorraLiberty Tue 11-Feb-14 15:52:31

YABU a bit

If she'd rang and told you your SIL wanted to take him out, the phone might have woken you up.

BridgetJonesPants25 Tue 11-Feb-14 15:59:15

You should know who your son is with and where he is. Next time maybe just ask what plans are and just say if plans change could you let me know?

If it doesn't suit you or you would rather they didn't just say thanks but no thanks.

BridgetJonesPants25 Tue 11-Feb-14 16:00:15

However if SIL has taken him out before with your knowledge they probably don't see it as a problem. I honestly wouldn't be bothered if I left DD with my Mum and my Brother decided to take her out somewhere...

curlew Tue 11-Feb-14 16:02:30

He's with his family. YABU. But you have a new baby, so you get a bit od slack......grin

PatriciaHolm Tue 11-Feb-14 16:08:52

Well, YABU really, if you trust them to look after him. Ask what their plans are next time?

Congrats on the baby though. You are entitled to be a bit hormonal at the moment!

Bigbadgladioli Tue 11-Feb-14 16:09:19

Depends on how you feel about MIL and SIL imo. I don't think you are being unreasonable at all.

But agree also with Bridget if you've got a happy and close relationship with your family then maybe you feel that way because you have a new baby.

My sons are a bit older now and it would still upset me if I didn't know where they were and who they were with.

Curlew is right you deserve to be cut some slack.

LimitedEditionLady Tue 11-Feb-14 16:34:37

I dont think yabu,i like to know where my ds is going and with who.Its not that I think he is in danger it puts my mind at rest to know what the plans are roughly.

motherinferior Tue 11-Feb-14 16:36:48

Had anyone announced they were keeping DD1 out for the full day when DD2 was two weeks old I would have wept with gratitude. Frankly, even a passing stranger. My sister's lovely partner I would have showered with chocolates.

ILoveFrogs Tue 11-Feb-14 16:47:03

I think YABU, as has already been mentioned it's family. This happenes with my DS all the time, he'll go to grans and I'll get a phone call hours later telling me he's with auntie, I personally don't see it as a big deal.

3catsnokids Tue 11-Feb-14 17:13:59

I do understand what you mean, and if I had a child I think I may well feel the same.

But, if you're normally happy with SIL looking after him then really there's no problem. When my nephew was coming up to 2 my husband and I popped into PIL's to find he was there for the day, so we offered to take him out for a few hours. As far as I can remember noone even thought to ring his mum to tell her.

Maryz Tue 11-Feb-14 17:17:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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